Read Online Silent Dances by A. C. Crispin, Kathleen O'Malley - Free Book Online

depth of wisdom no
    human could plumb. She realized this was someone who could
    understand her spi ri tually as well as mentally. Tesa had come to love
    the Avernian, who seemed more like a spi ri t being than an alien.
    Doctor Blanket was, in reality, an intelligent fungus, incredibly old, who,
    someday , would reproduce through spores. But no one who 'd ever
    experienced the alien's gentle wisdom and humor could ever refer to the
    Ave rn ian as an "it." Instead, eve ry one used the Mizari neuter pronoun
    " seloz."
    Finally, Tesa opened the parfleche she'd brought and removed a small ,
    red stone and a bundle of sweet grass. Placing the stone between
    them , she pulled a pinch of sweet grass from the bundle , crumbling it onto the stone. She used the parfleche as a screen, so the fire she
    needed to ignite the sweet grass would not harm the Avemian with its b
    ri ghtness . Slim curls of smoke wafted around them , climbing to the
    ceiling.
    41
    SILENT DANCES 41 Speaking telepathically, Doctor Blanket told her how
    much seloz enjoyed the scent of the burning sweet grass.
    "I do, too," Tesa signed in Plains Indian Sign Language. Doctor Blanket
    encouraged students to use their own languages when communicating with
    seloz. "There are so many memories in that smoke, so many ghosts ..." She
    stopped. "You know I'm leaving."
    The Blanket knew.
    "It's so hard to say good-bye ...
    Even with Doctor Blanket she avoided the subjects that had kept her tossing
    in bed--her confusion, her dreams. The dreams, especially, were a subject
    she feared to touch. If she discussed them, she might remember them.
    Besides, she argued with herself, how serious is a dream dreamt on this
    asteroid, that had to be towed to where it is, and can't even support life, left to its own devices?
    Doctor Blanket drew up on end and stood erect. The pearllike sheen of
    seloz' cilia reminded Tesa of the Grus' woven cloak.     such a love/hate relationship with their dreams.> The Blanket's thoughts
    tickled Tesa's mind with gentle amusement. She didn't experience seloz'
    thoughts as words, but as ideas-she thought of them as feelings directed to
    her.
     the Avernian "said,"     These dreams are like the "stories" my people invent for entertainment. Yet
    most humans either ignore their dreams or turn them into ominous warnings
    from the dark sides of their natures. Few humans ever see the beauty of their
    dreams or look on them as a visionary side of their minds.>
    They'd talked of this on other nights, but then it had just been philosophy.
     the Blanket continued,     couldn't understand my interest in seeing new worlds, or communicating
    with different beings. No doubt they attributed my interest in adventure to my
    youth.>
    The idea of Doctor Blanket being young startled Tesa so much she couldn
    ' t respond.
        42
    your standards I'm incredibly old,> the being replied, amused. "Are you
    saying you have no answers for me?" Tesa asked.     turmoil , I wouldn't know where to begin. Tell me first why you are trying to
    change your own feelings about your hearing. That confuses me.>
    Too weary to put into signs all her conflicting feelings, Tesa opened her mind. She thought of her choices and the bitterness she felt at having to
    make them at all. When she finally began to wind down, she felt emptied of
    anger and sorrow. But the terrible indecision was still there.
     the Avernian asked.
    "Maybe not hearing itself as much as the perception of being normal. I want to be Deaf, but that makes me feel selfish, as though I'm depriving my
    parents of the one thing they've always wanted. Or I feel