grab me as bait for Doane.”
“It sounds like a good plan to me,” Stang said.
“I’ll make a decision on how to handle Doane when I make the approach.”
“It seems to be the only way to keep Eve Duncan alive. Why not go along with Quinn?” He met Zander’s eyes. “And don’t tell me that you don’t care whether or not Eve survives. I’m no expert about analyzing your reactions. God knows, you’ve had decades to grow that hard shell, and I’ve just accepted that it has become part of you. But I watched you after that saloon blew up, and everyone thought Eve and Doane were dead. If you’re capable of caring about anything, you cared that night. You cared, Zander.”
Zander gazed at him without expression. “Maybe I was angry that I didn’t get my chance at Doane.”
“I don’t think so. You let me read Eve Duncan’s dossier. You talked to me about Doane and his son, Kevin. That was completely unlike you.”
“Was it?”
“Yes, you wanted me to know about Eve Duncan. You wanted someone to be on her side, to try to convince you to go after her and try to save her.”
“You think I’m that complicated?”
“I think that you’re an unsolvable Rubik’s cube.”
“That you’ve solved?”
“No, but perhaps you’ve given me enough clues to see a way to do it.” He grimaced. “Maybe. You’re fighting so hard not to care about Eve. For God’s sake, she’s your daughter. It’s pure instinct to care about her.” He gestured to the TV. “And there are dozens of people at that damn memorial service who will testify that she’s a life worth saving. She’s a very special person, Zander.”
“So eloquent. You must have been storing that dissertation up for a long time.”
He was silent a moment. “It’s what you want to hear from me, Zander. Now accept it and go save her.”
“Is that an order?” he asked silkily.
Stang found himself tensing. He was on very shaky ground at that moment. “Yes, and a plea. She must have gone through hell. She deserves to have it end.” He paused. “You had a meeting with her up in the mountains, didn’t you? Before Doane captured her again. You must have some idea what kind of person she is after that.”
Zander was silent. “Yes. She’s extraordinary.” His shoulder lifted in a half shrug. “And it has nothing to do with me. I could never have given her what her life experiences have done to shape her. It was good that I stayed away from her.”
“No regrets? What about her daughter, Bonnie? If you’d been there, you might have saved her.”
“Or brought a horde more of the scum of the earth down on her, who would only use her to destroy me. By the time I was twenty-five, I was on the enemies list of half a dozen countries and targeted by four criminal networks. The only way I could survive was to do it alone and with no encumbrances. Would you like to know how many people have died because I allowed them close to me? When I was a young man, I was arrogant enough to think I could keep it from happening because I wanted to reach out and pretend I was normal. That didn’t last long. Revenge and greed are powerful motivations, and I attract the bastards who go after both.” He gazed directly in Stang’s eyes. “So don’t try to lay any guilt trips on me, Stang. If I’d allowed myself to feel guilt, I would have put a bullet in my head a long time ago.” He added impatiently, “And stop staring at me with that sickeningly maudlin look on your face. I didn’t start being cautious with my associations because I wanted to spare anyone. I just realized that it wasn’t safe for me either.” He shrugged. “And it gets boring having to replace the people close to you. It’s better to keep them at a distance.”
“I see.”
“And I know all the philosophies and psychological explanations you’re probably stifling at the moment. Think what you like. I’ve made my life what it is, and that’s how it will remain.”
“After you
“It sounds like a good plan to me,” Stang said.
“I’ll make a decision on how to handle Doane when I make the approach.”
“It seems to be the only way to keep Eve Duncan alive. Why not go along with Quinn?” He met Zander’s eyes. “And don’t tell me that you don’t care whether or not Eve survives. I’m no expert about analyzing your reactions. God knows, you’ve had decades to grow that hard shell, and I’ve just accepted that it has become part of you. But I watched you after that saloon blew up, and everyone thought Eve and Doane were dead. If you’re capable of caring about anything, you cared that night. You cared, Zander.”
Zander gazed at him without expression. “Maybe I was angry that I didn’t get my chance at Doane.”
“I don’t think so. You let me read Eve Duncan’s dossier. You talked to me about Doane and his son, Kevin. That was completely unlike you.”
“Was it?”
“Yes, you wanted me to know about Eve Duncan. You wanted someone to be on her side, to try to convince you to go after her and try to save her.”
“You think I’m that complicated?”
“I think that you’re an unsolvable Rubik’s cube.”
“That you’ve solved?”
“No, but perhaps you’ve given me enough clues to see a way to do it.” He grimaced. “Maybe. You’re fighting so hard not to care about Eve. For God’s sake, she’s your daughter. It’s pure instinct to care about her.” He gestured to the TV. “And there are dozens of people at that damn memorial service who will testify that she’s a life worth saving. She’s a very special person, Zander.”
“So eloquent. You must have been storing that dissertation up for a long time.”
He was silent a moment. “It’s what you want to hear from me, Zander. Now accept it and go save her.”
“Is that an order?” he asked silkily.
Stang found himself tensing. He was on very shaky ground at that moment. “Yes, and a plea. She must have gone through hell. She deserves to have it end.” He paused. “You had a meeting with her up in the mountains, didn’t you? Before Doane captured her again. You must have some idea what kind of person she is after that.”
Zander was silent. “Yes. She’s extraordinary.” His shoulder lifted in a half shrug. “And it has nothing to do with me. I could never have given her what her life experiences have done to shape her. It was good that I stayed away from her.”
“No regrets? What about her daughter, Bonnie? If you’d been there, you might have saved her.”
“Or brought a horde more of the scum of the earth down on her, who would only use her to destroy me. By the time I was twenty-five, I was on the enemies list of half a dozen countries and targeted by four criminal networks. The only way I could survive was to do it alone and with no encumbrances. Would you like to know how many people have died because I allowed them close to me? When I was a young man, I was arrogant enough to think I could keep it from happening because I wanted to reach out and pretend I was normal. That didn’t last long. Revenge and greed are powerful motivations, and I attract the bastards who go after both.” He gazed directly in Stang’s eyes. “So don’t try to lay any guilt trips on me, Stang. If I’d allowed myself to feel guilt, I would have put a bullet in my head a long time ago.” He added impatiently, “And stop staring at me with that sickeningly maudlin look on your face. I didn’t start being cautious with my associations because I wanted to spare anyone. I just realized that it wasn’t safe for me either.” He shrugged. “And it gets boring having to replace the people close to you. It’s better to keep them at a distance.”
“I see.”
“And I know all the philosophies and psychological explanations you’re probably stifling at the moment. Think what you like. I’ve made my life what it is, and that’s how it will remain.”
“After you
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