Read Online Shut Up and Give Me the Mic by Dee Snider - Free Book Online Page B
Authors: Dee Snider
Ads: Link
when the music stops or the crowd gets antsy. We’re out there with our dick in our hands. All we’ve got to protect ourselves is the massive ego it takes to get up there in the first place. It’s that we’re so full of ourselves that makes us believe people will actually want to listen and watch us do the things we do. Front men are fucked in the head by definition.
It’s been said that most people are more afraid of public speaking than they are of dying. We are the nuts who choose the former as our livelihood. Of course we’re fucked-up. You need us to be! Our band members want us to be cocky, egotistical, and defiant onstage, but then “lose the ’tude” the minute we get offstage. Ha! It doesn’t work like that. It’s not a switch we can just flick on and off; it’s who we are. It’s what makes us tick. It’s what makes us rock. I appreciate your (the band’s) frustration, but the “ego-less front man” is a mythical creature, like a unicorn or Bigfoot. They don’t exist.
The point is, all bands hope against hope that somehow they can manage without a front man. Maybe one of the guys in the band, one of the musicians , can handle the job and they’ll be able to get by without one. While it can happen, and there are some great guitar or bass-player/vocalists, keyboard or even drummer/vocalists, the terrible truth is LSD is contagious. Eventually, whoever that “leadguy” is, will catch it and become just as bad as any other front man. It comes with the territory.
After dealing with two nightmare lead singers, Jay Jay was hoping that maybe he could make a go of it without one. He even brought his childhood friend Eddie Ojeda into the band on guitar and vocals. Eddie’s got a great voice . . . but he’s not a front man. Jay Jay tried to do it without one, but he couldn’t, so he made the call. Maybe this Danny Snider won’t be like the others. Fat chance.
It didn’t take me long to choose between the Dukes and Twisted Sister. I knew the whole fifties thing was just a craze; there was no future in recording old songs (Sha Na Na had already milked the hell out of that cow), and I would have to cut my hair! Deal breaker. I saw a real future in Twisted Sister, so I jumped at the chance to audition.
There was one problem. I had just finished training at my job, the guy I was replacing had left, and my boss was scheduled to go on vacation the week Twisted Sister wanted me to go away with them to audition. Wait a minute! I was looking for a way to get even with Zeke the Asshole. Problem solved! I quit my job without notice and left that prick hanging (no pun intended). It not only destroyed his vacation, but had him pulling 8-track tapes himself while he looked for a replacement for me. Payback’s a muthafucker!
this is twisted sister?
M y audition for Twisted Sister was not going to be typical. The band had a long weekend of shows booked in a club at an upstate New York ski area called Hunter Mountain. Jay Jay had made a deal with the Turtleneck Inn to spend the week there. The plan was for me to drive with the band to the club, audition, and, if all went well, rehearse with them during the week for the weekend shows. I don’t know if they were confident I would pass muster or just hopeful, but I readily agreed to the plan. I had never lost an audition in my life, but I still brought money for a bus ticket home. The last thing I wanted was to be stuck for a week with a band that didn’t want me and then have the long drive home with them as well. Besides, Queen (when they were still metal) were playing while I was away, and having not missed any of their previous tours (this was before they broke big—I’m an original fan! Queen II is the best), I wasn’t going to blow the audition and a chance to see my then-favorite band in concert.
I felt everything I’d done in my life up until that point had led to this audition. I was ready.
On February 1 (my dad’s birthday), the night before
It’s been said that most people are more afraid of public speaking than they are of dying. We are the nuts who choose the former as our livelihood. Of course we’re fucked-up. You need us to be! Our band members want us to be cocky, egotistical, and defiant onstage, but then “lose the ’tude” the minute we get offstage. Ha! It doesn’t work like that. It’s not a switch we can just flick on and off; it’s who we are. It’s what makes us tick. It’s what makes us rock. I appreciate your (the band’s) frustration, but the “ego-less front man” is a mythical creature, like a unicorn or Bigfoot. They don’t exist.
The point is, all bands hope against hope that somehow they can manage without a front man. Maybe one of the guys in the band, one of the musicians , can handle the job and they’ll be able to get by without one. While it can happen, and there are some great guitar or bass-player/vocalists, keyboard or even drummer/vocalists, the terrible truth is LSD is contagious. Eventually, whoever that “leadguy” is, will catch it and become just as bad as any other front man. It comes with the territory.
After dealing with two nightmare lead singers, Jay Jay was hoping that maybe he could make a go of it without one. He even brought his childhood friend Eddie Ojeda into the band on guitar and vocals. Eddie’s got a great voice . . . but he’s not a front man. Jay Jay tried to do it without one, but he couldn’t, so he made the call. Maybe this Danny Snider won’t be like the others. Fat chance.
It didn’t take me long to choose between the Dukes and Twisted Sister. I knew the whole fifties thing was just a craze; there was no future in recording old songs (Sha Na Na had already milked the hell out of that cow), and I would have to cut my hair! Deal breaker. I saw a real future in Twisted Sister, so I jumped at the chance to audition.
There was one problem. I had just finished training at my job, the guy I was replacing had left, and my boss was scheduled to go on vacation the week Twisted Sister wanted me to go away with them to audition. Wait a minute! I was looking for a way to get even with Zeke the Asshole. Problem solved! I quit my job without notice and left that prick hanging (no pun intended). It not only destroyed his vacation, but had him pulling 8-track tapes himself while he looked for a replacement for me. Payback’s a muthafucker!
this is twisted sister?
M y audition for Twisted Sister was not going to be typical. The band had a long weekend of shows booked in a club at an upstate New York ski area called Hunter Mountain. Jay Jay had made a deal with the Turtleneck Inn to spend the week there. The plan was for me to drive with the band to the club, audition, and, if all went well, rehearse with them during the week for the weekend shows. I don’t know if they were confident I would pass muster or just hopeful, but I readily agreed to the plan. I had never lost an audition in my life, but I still brought money for a bus ticket home. The last thing I wanted was to be stuck for a week with a band that didn’t want me and then have the long drive home with them as well. Besides, Queen (when they were still metal) were playing while I was away, and having not missed any of their previous tours (this was before they broke big—I’m an original fan! Queen II is the best), I wasn’t going to blow the audition and a chance to see my then-favorite band in concert.
I felt everything I’d done in my life up until that point had led to this audition. I was ready.
On February 1 (my dad’s birthday), the night before
Similar Books
