that your wife at the time wanted desperately to put back on the streets, for some incomprehensible reason.’
‘She was a public defender.’
That elicited a snort from Wild Jim. ‘Bad bedmates, cops and public defenders. But I guess you figured that out.’
The comment really pissed Magozzi off. It was incredibly bad form to bring up his ugly divorce that had been so
‘Come on, where’s your sense of humor, Magozzi? I’ve had five divorces, so that makes you four times smarter than me. Hey, do you know what the difference is between a criminal and a public defender?’
‘No, Judge, I don’t,’ Magozzi said flatly.
‘Neither do I!’ He busted a gut laughing at his own tired joke, then his eyes honed in on Gino. ‘And I remember you, too, Rolseth. Only saw you once, but we made a good team. We exterminated some vermin that day, yes indeed. So, Detectives, assuming this isn’t a social call, what can I do for you?’
‘A body was found in the river this morning,’ Gino said.
‘Ah.
That’s
why there were so damn many cops in my front yard. So what happened to the poor schmuck?’
‘Drowned.’
‘And I’m talking to two homicide detectives. Isn’t that interesting.’
Magozzi ignored the comment. ‘We understand you may have seen something last night.’
‘You wouldn’t believe the depraved shit I see down by the river, every goddamned night. People having sex, shooting up, smoking crack … I don’t know what happened to this city.’
‘Last night specifically,’ Magozzi said, trying to get him back on track. ‘The sergeant running the canvass said you mentioned a commotion.’
‘Raising hell? What does that mean?’
‘He was crashing through the brush, yodeling like a coloratura soprano on helium.’
‘Calling for help?’ Gino asked.
Wild Jim leaned back in his chair and rubbed his bloodshot eyes. ‘You know what the problem with this line of questioning is, Detectives? I’m a bourbon aficionado. And when you like Kentucky horse piss as much as I do, memories and recollections are hard to come by. If I saw something, I don’t remember it. All I can tell you is I heard yodeling, then I heard a cop shouting at me to wake up this morning. There’s nothing in between.’
Magozzi sighed audibly.
‘Don’t look so dejected, my friend. I may be a dissolute drunk, but just because I don’t remember last night right now doesn’t mean I won’t think of something later. So, are you expecting your perp to get into more monkey business down there, maybe return to the scene, or is this a one-off murder?’
Magozzi and Gino just shrugged noncommitally.
‘Well, there’s my answer. Tell you what – I’m down there every night anyhow. I’ll be your eyes and ears. And I know where to find you.’
‘We wouldn’t recommend night walks by the river for a while.’
The judge smiled. ‘I’m sure I’ll have plenty of company.
‘Should you be?’
‘Absolutely. Anybody down by that river last night should be a suspect, but I don’t have to tell you that. Anything else you need to know?’
Magozzi looked straight at him. ‘Yeah. What happened to the respected judge who sat on the bench, handing out justice for twenty years?’
The judge looked surprised. ‘Nothing happened to that respected judge. You’re looking at him. I sat on the bench handing out justice for twenty years, and for every one of them I was drunk out of my mind. Kind of puts a wrinkle in the robe, doesn’t it?’
Clint ran his red pen down the list next to his computer, crossing off the items he’d completed one by one. Feed Ruffian. Eat supper. Wash dishes. Code post.
If you’re too stupid to remember your chores, write them down, Clinton.
The only valuable advice from the dead bitch who claimed to have borne him, although the thought of such a thing still made him sick to his stomach. To have lived in the sagging, bloating belly of such a creature was more than he could imagine.
He put a gold star
‘She was a public defender.’
That elicited a snort from Wild Jim. ‘Bad bedmates, cops and public defenders. But I guess you figured that out.’
The comment really pissed Magozzi off. It was incredibly bad form to bring up his ugly divorce that had been so
‘Come on, where’s your sense of humor, Magozzi? I’ve had five divorces, so that makes you four times smarter than me. Hey, do you know what the difference is between a criminal and a public defender?’
‘No, Judge, I don’t,’ Magozzi said flatly.
‘Neither do I!’ He busted a gut laughing at his own tired joke, then his eyes honed in on Gino. ‘And I remember you, too, Rolseth. Only saw you once, but we made a good team. We exterminated some vermin that day, yes indeed. So, Detectives, assuming this isn’t a social call, what can I do for you?’
‘A body was found in the river this morning,’ Gino said.
‘Ah.
That’s
why there were so damn many cops in my front yard. So what happened to the poor schmuck?’
‘Drowned.’
‘And I’m talking to two homicide detectives. Isn’t that interesting.’
Magozzi ignored the comment. ‘We understand you may have seen something last night.’
‘You wouldn’t believe the depraved shit I see down by the river, every goddamned night. People having sex, shooting up, smoking crack … I don’t know what happened to this city.’
‘Last night specifically,’ Magozzi said, trying to get him back on track. ‘The sergeant running the canvass said you mentioned a commotion.’
‘Raising hell? What does that mean?’
‘He was crashing through the brush, yodeling like a coloratura soprano on helium.’
‘Calling for help?’ Gino asked.
Wild Jim leaned back in his chair and rubbed his bloodshot eyes. ‘You know what the problem with this line of questioning is, Detectives? I’m a bourbon aficionado. And when you like Kentucky horse piss as much as I do, memories and recollections are hard to come by. If I saw something, I don’t remember it. All I can tell you is I heard yodeling, then I heard a cop shouting at me to wake up this morning. There’s nothing in between.’
Magozzi sighed audibly.
‘Don’t look so dejected, my friend. I may be a dissolute drunk, but just because I don’t remember last night right now doesn’t mean I won’t think of something later. So, are you expecting your perp to get into more monkey business down there, maybe return to the scene, or is this a one-off murder?’
Magozzi and Gino just shrugged noncommitally.
‘Well, there’s my answer. Tell you what – I’m down there every night anyhow. I’ll be your eyes and ears. And I know where to find you.’
‘We wouldn’t recommend night walks by the river for a while.’
The judge smiled. ‘I’m sure I’ll have plenty of company.
‘Should you be?’
‘Absolutely. Anybody down by that river last night should be a suspect, but I don’t have to tell you that. Anything else you need to know?’
Magozzi looked straight at him. ‘Yeah. What happened to the respected judge who sat on the bench, handing out justice for twenty years?’
The judge looked surprised. ‘Nothing happened to that respected judge. You’re looking at him. I sat on the bench handing out justice for twenty years, and for every one of them I was drunk out of my mind. Kind of puts a wrinkle in the robe, doesn’t it?’
Clint ran his red pen down the list next to his computer, crossing off the items he’d completed one by one. Feed Ruffian. Eat supper. Wash dishes. Code post.
If you’re too stupid to remember your chores, write them down, Clinton.
The only valuable advice from the dead bitch who claimed to have borne him, although the thought of such a thing still made him sick to his stomach. To have lived in the sagging, bloating belly of such a creature was more than he could imagine.
He put a gold star
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