set,” said the sharp blonde in reply. “Authorized cast and crew only. And only a few of the crew at that.”
“Because of the sex scenes?”
She nodded, and smiled. “But I’m not here for her,” she said, surprising me. “Come on—I have a table booked at La Provençale.”
I wrinkled my brow. “For you and me?”
She grinned. “Would that be all right? Hayley asked me to keep you company a little this evening.”
“Uh…okay, I suppose that would be fine.”
She drove so I could drink, and I guess I did need a strong glass or two. It was a nice discreet restaurant with low-lighting and the kind of booths that could keep everyone but the waiting staff from intruding on a private conversation.
“So, how are you feeling?”
“Good. I think.”
Liona was sympathetic to my plight. It felt nice to have a reassuring person to talk to. “You know it’s just a movie, right?”
“Of course.”
“So I don’t have to tell you they won’t be…you know…fucking…for real?”
“I know.”
She nodded. “And most of the time they’re shooting, they’ll be wearing underwear anyway….”
“Most of the time?” I attempted a wry grin.
She broke out into another broad smile. She was one of those blondes who made you feel like you’d achieved something impressive just to make her smile like that. It warmed me a little inside, at least, where my nest of vipers was currently squirming.
We ordered our food—salad for Liona, who didn’t appear to be eating properly, merely for show—and a fish dish for myself—with the waiter providing some exceedingly speedy service.
“It’s really very awkward,” she said. “Shooting sex scenes. Not sexy at all.”
“You seen many?” I chomped on breadsticks while she didn’t even seem to want to consume water while we waited for our meals, and I suspected she was on some kind of special diet—one of those Hollywood women, paranoid about their weight.
“A few,” she said. “And I hear about them from my clients, of course. You’ve got dozens of people standing around tending to this or that, repositioning you, lighting you, the director yelling instructions, guys running in to blast you with fake sweat between takes. You’re trying not to stumble over your lines and not to get in the way of the other actor’s light…all while trying to seem like you’re so passionate about him, so completely into the sex…it’s really not an enjoyable experience for the actors.”
“I suppose not.”
“Everyone’s kind of embarrassed about it, and the things the director’s shouting seem kind of dumb all the time, and the actors are both wishing they were somewhere else—anywhere else, and they’re imagining that everyone around them is judging them—and they’re not, but you can’t get away from feeling that. It’s nothing like you’d imagine seeing the footage at the end.”
“I guess it takes great acting, huh?” I smiled.
“But they have incentive to get it over with as fast as possible.”
“A week, though,” I laughed. “And they’re only mostly wearing underwear while they’re doing it.”
She laughed. “He’ll probably be wearing a little flesh-colored thong when they’re doing the actual fucking parts,” she said.
“Dry humping all week with Aaron Simpson,” I chuckled. “Some girls would kill for that.”
“You’re a good guy, David, supporting her in all this. You guys should get well rewarded, too. I think Hayley will really make it with this movie.”
“I hope so. She deserves to.”
“She has the talent, she has the looks.”
*
I took it as a good sign that Hayley came back from her week shooting sex scenes, and she wasn’t in the mood for real sex for a while.
“God, I never want to do that again,” she said, as she slumped down with me in front of the TV wearing baggy sweatpants and a hooded top. “It was, like, the most awkward thing I’ve ever done.”
“You got to spend all
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