Read Online Scarlet Wakefield 01 - Kiss Me Kill Me by Lauren Henderson - Free Book Online
Authors: Lauren Henderson
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embarrassed about them. He nudges my head sideways so he can reach my mouth without our noses getting in the way, and I think Oh, so that’s how it’s done. . . .
And then his lips are gently pressing against mine. They’re really soft. I don’t know what I was expecting. I’ve never kissed anyone on the mouth before. Sixteen and never been kissed. God, how tragic. I’m terrified of doing it wrong. At least I’ve seen a ton of kisses on TV and in films. What did people do before television? How did they have any idea what it meant to kiss someone properly? You can read about stuff in books, but that’s nothing compared to seeing it happen.
It’s part of going to an all-girls’ school, of course: if I’d been at a normal, mixed school, I’d have snogged at least a few boys by now. But then this wouldn’t be my first kiss. With Dan. On this terrace. With a soft night breeze lifting my hair, and stars in the sky. So I’d rather have it this way. And it’s not as if he’s pulled away, laughing at me and telling me I obviously don’t know what I’m doing. . . .
God, Scarlett! Where is your brain going? I’m so dazed with what’s happening I feel like I’m on drugs, or drunk, or both. I feel as light as a feather (dizzy and spinning with the sensation of Dan’s lips on mine and the extraordinary concept that it’s me, out of all the girls here, that he wants to kiss) and as heavy as lead (I’m gigantic, I must weigh twenty pounds more than Plum, how can he bear to touch me?). Dan’s hand is on my waist and I’m terrified that it will (a) stray down and feel the fat on my side, or (b) stray up and touch my breast, which would make me scared that he’s only kissing me because of them, but he’s kissing me and kissing me and I’m kissing him back and suddenly I can’t think of anything but his mouth.
They say kissed, but really it’s hundreds of tiny kisses. You don’t see that so much on TV. I wasn’t expecting this: Dan is kissing all around my lips, till they feel swollen, big and pouty like a supermodel’s. And now he’s nipping at them, biting them lightly, but somehow that’s incredibly exciting. I feel something inside me melt and pour like honey, and I realize that I’m nipping back at him, teasing him with little bites like he’s teasing me. He groans. That’s a little scary, because he sounds like a man when he makes that sound. It comes from deep down inside him, like the part of me that’s melting.
And then Dan wraps his arms around me tightly, and his tongue slides into my mouth, warm and wet.
I knew this was going to happen. But I thought I would have to brace myself, because it would feel weird, and instead it feels unbelievably sexy. It’s the sexiest thing I have ever felt in my life. I hear someone moaning and I realize that it’s me, and Dan’s making that deep groaning noise again and clutching me to him, and I’m clinging on to him for dear life, and my tongue is meeting his.
We’re entwined like someone’s roped our bodies tightly together. We’re holding on to each other like we’ll drown if we let go. I can’t imagine ever wanting this to stop.
And then the terrible thing happens, and nothing will ever be the same again.
six
“YOU KILLED HIM”
All of a sudden, Dan’s grasp loosens. He jerks back from me so abruptly that cold air rushes in on the front of my body. My hands drop, too. I feel stupid, holding on to him when he’s let go of me. I must have done something that showed him how inexperienced I was. He’s probably embarrassed that he ever wanted to kiss me in the first place.
However, that fear drifts away and another takes its place when I see that Dan’s hands are scrabbling at his jeans pocket. His skin is losing its color and his eyes are fixed on me, like he’s in a state of sheer panic. He manages to gasp out some sounds that resemble words.
Oh my God. Now I realize that he’s choking—
“Scarlett,” he manages,
And then his lips are gently pressing against mine. They’re really soft. I don’t know what I was expecting. I’ve never kissed anyone on the mouth before. Sixteen and never been kissed. God, how tragic. I’m terrified of doing it wrong. At least I’ve seen a ton of kisses on TV and in films. What did people do before television? How did they have any idea what it meant to kiss someone properly? You can read about stuff in books, but that’s nothing compared to seeing it happen.
It’s part of going to an all-girls’ school, of course: if I’d been at a normal, mixed school, I’d have snogged at least a few boys by now. But then this wouldn’t be my first kiss. With Dan. On this terrace. With a soft night breeze lifting my hair, and stars in the sky. So I’d rather have it this way. And it’s not as if he’s pulled away, laughing at me and telling me I obviously don’t know what I’m doing. . . .
God, Scarlett! Where is your brain going? I’m so dazed with what’s happening I feel like I’m on drugs, or drunk, or both. I feel as light as a feather (dizzy and spinning with the sensation of Dan’s lips on mine and the extraordinary concept that it’s me, out of all the girls here, that he wants to kiss) and as heavy as lead (I’m gigantic, I must weigh twenty pounds more than Plum, how can he bear to touch me?). Dan’s hand is on my waist and I’m terrified that it will (a) stray down and feel the fat on my side, or (b) stray up and touch my breast, which would make me scared that he’s only kissing me because of them, but he’s kissing me and kissing me and I’m kissing him back and suddenly I can’t think of anything but his mouth.
They say kissed, but really it’s hundreds of tiny kisses. You don’t see that so much on TV. I wasn’t expecting this: Dan is kissing all around my lips, till they feel swollen, big and pouty like a supermodel’s. And now he’s nipping at them, biting them lightly, but somehow that’s incredibly exciting. I feel something inside me melt and pour like honey, and I realize that I’m nipping back at him, teasing him with little bites like he’s teasing me. He groans. That’s a little scary, because he sounds like a man when he makes that sound. It comes from deep down inside him, like the part of me that’s melting.
And then Dan wraps his arms around me tightly, and his tongue slides into my mouth, warm and wet.
I knew this was going to happen. But I thought I would have to brace myself, because it would feel weird, and instead it feels unbelievably sexy. It’s the sexiest thing I have ever felt in my life. I hear someone moaning and I realize that it’s me, and Dan’s making that deep groaning noise again and clutching me to him, and I’m clinging on to him for dear life, and my tongue is meeting his.
We’re entwined like someone’s roped our bodies tightly together. We’re holding on to each other like we’ll drown if we let go. I can’t imagine ever wanting this to stop.
And then the terrible thing happens, and nothing will ever be the same again.
six
“YOU KILLED HIM”
All of a sudden, Dan’s grasp loosens. He jerks back from me so abruptly that cold air rushes in on the front of my body. My hands drop, too. I feel stupid, holding on to him when he’s let go of me. I must have done something that showed him how inexperienced I was. He’s probably embarrassed that he ever wanted to kiss me in the first place.
However, that fear drifts away and another takes its place when I see that Dan’s hands are scrabbling at his jeans pocket. His skin is losing its color and his eyes are fixed on me, like he’s in a state of sheer panic. He manages to gasp out some sounds that resemble words.
Oh my God. Now I realize that he’s choking—
“Scarlett,” he manages,
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