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smile on my face. Poppy was rubbing his whiskers, pondering whether to shave or not.
    â€œWell, you sure look better, sweetie,” he said to her. “I think I’ll go wait outside with your mother. Come on out when y’all are ready.” Mama stared at herself in the mirror over the dresser and towel-dried the hair hanging over her left shoulder. She let her other towel fall, and I caught a glimpse of her skinny body. She was too skinny now, causing a couple dimples to run down the back of her legs, and her chest was beginning to droop. It was like seeing a scary image of my future. I pinched my eyes shut and turned toward the window, curtains still drawn.
    Rainey was engulfed in a Tom and Jerry cartoon. Tom was chasing Jerry down a dock. When they jumped off into the water, she turned away and said, “Mama, we go home now?”
    Mama struggled with her bra, back toward me, and then turned to face me, holding her shirt up to her chest. Wearing a strange, I-mean-business look—very unusual for her—she said, “Not another word about going home. It’s time we stopped whining and started acting like grown-ups.”
    I raised my eyebrows. Rainey looked shocked. I hadn’t thought she was whining at all, but maybe being pregnant, Mama was hearing things differently. Then Mama realized what she said and who she’d said it to and crumbled. She got on her knees next to Rainey and hugged her. “I’m so sorry. I’m just . . . I’m just confused.
    I really need to stay away right now. I know you don’t understand—”“I ’stand. Okay, Mama? Love you.”
    â€œThank you, baby. I love you too.”
    Mama put her shirt on and fluffed her hair, then moved to the mirror again, stretching her skin back at the temples so she looked younger. Changing her tone, she said, “I think I need a face-lift. What do you think?”
    I thought of saying something back, but it wasn’t very nice so I decided to keep my mouth shut. Rainey just watched her cartoon again.
    Mama looked at me in the reflection and nodded, determined. Then she moved to the little table between the beds and turned on the light. She opened the drawer, pulled out a Black Mountain phone book, and flipped through the pages till she found what she wanted. She stared for a minute, set the book back in the drawer, and closed it tight.
    â€œEverything okay, Mama?” I asked.
    She rubbed the back of her neck and said as she was getting up, “Yes, I guess that’s how it’s got to be.” Mama moved to the mirror again and sighed, looking at her reflection. She smooshed her hair up into a do and let it fall. She puckered her lips and smacked them a couple times. “Just give me just a few minutes, troops, and we’ll get out of here.”
    â€œWhere we goin’?” asked Rainey, peeling herself away from the television. Tom just got bopped on the head with an anvil.
    â€œPut on your walking shoes, honey. We’re going to a lake.” Then turning away from Rainey so she couldn’t hear but I could, Mama mumbled, “Maybe drown my sorrows and just get it all over with . . .”
    My throat tied up in a little ball, and I pictured myself having to dive in and save my mama neck deep in water. I knew it was just something grown-ups said, drowning their sorrows , but still . . . I hoped and prayed I’d be strong enough if and when it ever looked like Mama might go under.

Chapter Eleven

LAKE TOMAHAWK
    The water in Lake Tomahawk was real peaceful, no waves like the ocean, but ducks trailed and swam all here and there—brown ones, white ones, and a little ugly duck with a poofy hairdo, looked like Grandma Mona. Oh, and there were these little round ripples blossoming all over the place.
    â€œWhat that, Mama?” Rainey asked, pointing to something lying on the surface. There were hundreds of those somethings everywhere. “Oh, Mama,