Read Online Sassinak by Anne McCaffrey, Elizabeth Moon - Free Book Online
Authors: Anne McCaffrey, Elizabeth Moon
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adventure rather than a safe seat in the family corporation. That she never claimed such a connection spoke well of her; others claimed it in her name.
Her own researches into her family were discreet. The psychs had passed her as safely adjusted to the loss of her family. She wasn't sure how they'd react if they found her rummaging through the colonial databases, so she masked her queries carefully. She didn't want anyone to question her fitness for Fleet. When she'd entered everything she could remember, she waited for the computer to spit out the rest.
The first surprise was a living relative (or "supposed alive" the computer had it) some three generations back. Sass blinked at the screen. A great-great-great grandmother (or aunt: she wasn't quite sure of the code symbols) now on Exploration Service. Lunzie . . . so that was the famous ancestor her little sister had been named for. Her mother had said no more than that—may not have known more than that, Sass realized. Even as a cadet, she herself had access to more information than most colonists, already. She thought of contacting her distant family members someday . . . someday when she was a successful Fleet officer. Not any time soon, though. Fleet would be her family, and Abe was her father now.
He took his responsibility seriously in more ways than one, she discovered at their next meeting.
"Take the five-year implant, and don't worry about it. You're not going to be a mother anytime soon. Should have had it before now, probably."
"I don't want to be a sopping romantic, either," said Sass, scowling.
Abe grinned at her. "Sass, I'm not telling you to fall in love. I'm telling you that you're grown, and your body knows it. You don't have to do anything you don't want to do, but you're about to want to."
"I am not ." Sass glared at him.
"You haven't noticed anything?"
Sass opened her mouth to deny it, only to realize that she couldn't. He'd seen her with the others, and he, more than anyone, knew every nuance of her body.
"Take the implant. Do what you want afterwards."
"You're not telling me to be careful," she said, almost petulantly.
"Stars, girl, I only adopted you. I'm not really your father, and even if I were I wouldn't tell you to be careful. Not you, of all people."
"My . . . my real father . . ."
"Was a dirtball colonist. I'm Fleet. You're Fleet now. You don't believe all that stuff you were taught. You're the last woman to stay virginal all your life, Sass, and that's the truth of it. Learn what you need, and see that you get it."
Sass shivered. "Sounds very mechanical, that way."
"Not really." Abe smiled at her, wistful and tender. "Sass, it's a great pleasure, and a great relaxation. For some people, long-term pairing is part of it. Your parents may have been that way. But you aren't that sort. I've watched you now for what? Eight years, is it, or ten? You're an adventurer by nature; you always were, and what happened to you brought it out even stronger. You're passionate, but you don't want to be bothered with long-term relationships."
The five-year implant she requested at Medical raised no eyebrows. When the doctor discovered it was her first, she insisted that Sass read a folder about it " . . . So you'll know nothing's wrong when that patch on your arm changes color. Just come in for another one. It'll be in your records, of course, but sometimes your records aren't with you."
Once she had the implant, she couldn't seem to stop thinking about it. Who would it be? Who would be first , she scolded herself, accepting with no more argument Abe's estimate of her character. She watched the other cadets covertly. Bronze-haired Liami, who bounced in and out of beds with the same verve as she gobbled dessert treats on holidays. Cal and Deri, who could have starred in any of the romantic serial tragedies, always in one crisis of emotion or another. How they passed their courses was a constant topic of
Her own researches into her family were discreet. The psychs had passed her as safely adjusted to the loss of her family. She wasn't sure how they'd react if they found her rummaging through the colonial databases, so she masked her queries carefully. She didn't want anyone to question her fitness for Fleet. When she'd entered everything she could remember, she waited for the computer to spit out the rest.
The first surprise was a living relative (or "supposed alive" the computer had it) some three generations back. Sass blinked at the screen. A great-great-great grandmother (or aunt: she wasn't quite sure of the code symbols) now on Exploration Service. Lunzie . . . so that was the famous ancestor her little sister had been named for. Her mother had said no more than that—may not have known more than that, Sass realized. Even as a cadet, she herself had access to more information than most colonists, already. She thought of contacting her distant family members someday . . . someday when she was a successful Fleet officer. Not any time soon, though. Fleet would be her family, and Abe was her father now.
He took his responsibility seriously in more ways than one, she discovered at their next meeting.
"Take the five-year implant, and don't worry about it. You're not going to be a mother anytime soon. Should have had it before now, probably."
"I don't want to be a sopping romantic, either," said Sass, scowling.
Abe grinned at her. "Sass, I'm not telling you to fall in love. I'm telling you that you're grown, and your body knows it. You don't have to do anything you don't want to do, but you're about to want to."
"I am not ." Sass glared at him.
"You haven't noticed anything?"
Sass opened her mouth to deny it, only to realize that she couldn't. He'd seen her with the others, and he, more than anyone, knew every nuance of her body.
"Take the implant. Do what you want afterwards."
"You're not telling me to be careful," she said, almost petulantly.
"Stars, girl, I only adopted you. I'm not really your father, and even if I were I wouldn't tell you to be careful. Not you, of all people."
"My . . . my real father . . ."
"Was a dirtball colonist. I'm Fleet. You're Fleet now. You don't believe all that stuff you were taught. You're the last woman to stay virginal all your life, Sass, and that's the truth of it. Learn what you need, and see that you get it."
Sass shivered. "Sounds very mechanical, that way."
"Not really." Abe smiled at her, wistful and tender. "Sass, it's a great pleasure, and a great relaxation. For some people, long-term pairing is part of it. Your parents may have been that way. But you aren't that sort. I've watched you now for what? Eight years, is it, or ten? You're an adventurer by nature; you always were, and what happened to you brought it out even stronger. You're passionate, but you don't want to be bothered with long-term relationships."
The five-year implant she requested at Medical raised no eyebrows. When the doctor discovered it was her first, she insisted that Sass read a folder about it " . . . So you'll know nothing's wrong when that patch on your arm changes color. Just come in for another one. It'll be in your records, of course, but sometimes your records aren't with you."
Once she had the implant, she couldn't seem to stop thinking about it. Who would it be? Who would be first , she scolded herself, accepting with no more argument Abe's estimate of her character. She watched the other cadets covertly. Bronze-haired Liami, who bounced in and out of beds with the same verve as she gobbled dessert treats on holidays. Cal and Deri, who could have starred in any of the romantic serial tragedies, always in one crisis of emotion or another. How they passed their courses was a constant topic of
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