Read Online Rock Stars Do It Dirty by Jasinda Wilder - Free Book Online Page B
Authors: Jasinda Wilder
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while, headlining at the Mayne Stage here in Chicago.
He liked Tess, a lot. He had a good time with her.
But…it just wasn’t enough.
Tess emerged from the shower to find Chase standing naked at the eleventh-floor window, staring out at the swirling snow. She stood next to him in silence for a while, then looked up at him.
“This isn’t working, Chase.”
He glanced down at her. Serious green eyes gazed back up at him, calm and collected. “No, I guess not.” He turned back to the view of downtown Chicago. “I’m sorry.”
“Why are you sorry?”
“I don’t know. It’s…I’m just sorry this didn’t work. You’re an amazing girl, and I wish—”
“I can’t keep up with you. I know I can’t. But I think that’s only a part of the problem. There’s something else. That thing you said you’d tell me ‘eventually.’” Tess leaned her head against his arm. “This is eventually, but you still don’t have to tell me. It’s someone else. I see the way you look at me sometimes. Maybe I look like her, or something. I don’t know. But that’s what it is.”
“Yeah, sort of. But it’s—”
“Complicated,” Tess said in sync with him.
“Yeah,” Chase said. “It’s really complicated.”
Tess turned away from him, dropped the towel, and stepped into her panties, then hooked her bra around her middle and slipped it on. “I don’t need to know the details. But I’ll tell you this: A lot of the time, when someone says something is complicated, what they really mean is they’re afraid of the truth. They’re afraid of what will happen, afraid of the consequences.” She turned back to Chase. “Good things often come with tough consequences. It just makes us appreciate the good that much more.”
“You’re right,” Chase said. “But it’s not me you have to convince. It’s her.”
Tess shrugged. “ I don’t have to convince anyone. You do. And if it’s meant to be, it’ll happen.” She put on her flight attendant uniform, zipped her bags, and then set her rolling suitcase on end, handle extended. “I care about you, Chase. You’re a good man and an incredible lover. I really am sorry this didn’t work out, too.”
Chase thunked his head against the cold glass, then moved toward Tess. “I haven’t been fair to you, Tess. And that’s what I’m sorry for.”
She smiled at him, a little sadly. “I knew this was coming a long time ago. I knew it was coming when you said you didn’t want to talk about it back in Eric’s gym. I was just being selfish. I wanted a piece of you for myself.”
“Well, you got a piece. A big piece.” He grinned lecherously, but his heart wasn’t in it, and neither was hers. “Seriously, though. This goodbye sucks.”
Tess nodded. “Yes, it does. All goodbyes do.”
He leaned toward her and kissed her, careful not to smudge her makeup or wrinkle her uniform. When he let her go, Tess took a deep breath and let it out.
“Goodbye, Chase.”
“’Bye, Tess.” He watched her leave, wondering what he was supposed to do with himself now.
He took a long shower and dressed, packed his one duffel bag, and left the hotel. The snow was bitterly cold against his shower-hot skin, and the wind was even worse, snatching his breath away. He walked aimlessly, trying to empty his heart, snuff out the turmoil inside himself. He shrugged deeper into his thick coat, eyes downcast, attention wandering. His bag was slung over one shoulder, and his hands were dug into his pockets. He thought he might be capable of just walking, walking, walking until the snow buried him or the cold froze him, or the hole in his chest ate him from the inside out.
Then he rounded a corner, and something soft yet firm slammed into him, knocking him backward. He slipped on a patch of ice, tangled up with whoever he’d run into, and tumbled to the sidewalk, slamming his head into the concrete. He saw stars, squeezing his eyes shut against the pain. Then something
He liked Tess, a lot. He had a good time with her.
But…it just wasn’t enough.
Tess emerged from the shower to find Chase standing naked at the eleventh-floor window, staring out at the swirling snow. She stood next to him in silence for a while, then looked up at him.
“This isn’t working, Chase.”
He glanced down at her. Serious green eyes gazed back up at him, calm and collected. “No, I guess not.” He turned back to the view of downtown Chicago. “I’m sorry.”
“Why are you sorry?”
“I don’t know. It’s…I’m just sorry this didn’t work. You’re an amazing girl, and I wish—”
“I can’t keep up with you. I know I can’t. But I think that’s only a part of the problem. There’s something else. That thing you said you’d tell me ‘eventually.’” Tess leaned her head against his arm. “This is eventually, but you still don’t have to tell me. It’s someone else. I see the way you look at me sometimes. Maybe I look like her, or something. I don’t know. But that’s what it is.”
“Yeah, sort of. But it’s—”
“Complicated,” Tess said in sync with him.
“Yeah,” Chase said. “It’s really complicated.”
Tess turned away from him, dropped the towel, and stepped into her panties, then hooked her bra around her middle and slipped it on. “I don’t need to know the details. But I’ll tell you this: A lot of the time, when someone says something is complicated, what they really mean is they’re afraid of the truth. They’re afraid of what will happen, afraid of the consequences.” She turned back to Chase. “Good things often come with tough consequences. It just makes us appreciate the good that much more.”
“You’re right,” Chase said. “But it’s not me you have to convince. It’s her.”
Tess shrugged. “ I don’t have to convince anyone. You do. And if it’s meant to be, it’ll happen.” She put on her flight attendant uniform, zipped her bags, and then set her rolling suitcase on end, handle extended. “I care about you, Chase. You’re a good man and an incredible lover. I really am sorry this didn’t work out, too.”
Chase thunked his head against the cold glass, then moved toward Tess. “I haven’t been fair to you, Tess. And that’s what I’m sorry for.”
She smiled at him, a little sadly. “I knew this was coming a long time ago. I knew it was coming when you said you didn’t want to talk about it back in Eric’s gym. I was just being selfish. I wanted a piece of you for myself.”
“Well, you got a piece. A big piece.” He grinned lecherously, but his heart wasn’t in it, and neither was hers. “Seriously, though. This goodbye sucks.”
Tess nodded. “Yes, it does. All goodbyes do.”
He leaned toward her and kissed her, careful not to smudge her makeup or wrinkle her uniform. When he let her go, Tess took a deep breath and let it out.
“Goodbye, Chase.”
“’Bye, Tess.” He watched her leave, wondering what he was supposed to do with himself now.
He took a long shower and dressed, packed his one duffel bag, and left the hotel. The snow was bitterly cold against his shower-hot skin, and the wind was even worse, snatching his breath away. He walked aimlessly, trying to empty his heart, snuff out the turmoil inside himself. He shrugged deeper into his thick coat, eyes downcast, attention wandering. His bag was slung over one shoulder, and his hands were dug into his pockets. He thought he might be capable of just walking, walking, walking until the snow buried him or the cold froze him, or the hole in his chest ate him from the inside out.
Then he rounded a corner, and something soft yet firm slammed into him, knocking him backward. He slipped on a patch of ice, tangled up with whoever he’d run into, and tumbled to the sidewalk, slamming his head into the concrete. He saw stars, squeezing his eyes shut against the pain. Then something
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