seen together. They spent much of their free time attending all of the big church and school events as a couple. It was widely assumed by their families and friends they would marry and raise a family.
Words of love and devotion were not spoken aloud by the two as they finished up high school and began college. Looking back to that period in her life, Robin knew now she had naively taken it for granted her bond with Thomas included his unshakable love and loyalty. She assumed their marriage would last forever.
When the time came to attend college out of state after two years of studying at the local community college, a well-intentioned outside party suggested the couple marry. Then they could live in the university’s ‘Married Student Housing’ and save money. There was no still no official declaration of love or formal proposal of marriage by Thomas. By mutual agreement, a simple wedding, reception, and honeymoon were planned.
Robin and Thomas were married in a traditional wedding ceremony at the tender age of twenty at Bonita Creek Christian Fellowship’s redwood sanctuary. The couple was too young, immature, and ignorant to understand or acknowledge the kind of work goes into a successful, warm, loving marriage.
When they were preparing for the wedding, the reception, and the honeymoon, Robin now recognized subtle warning signs she’d failed to heed. Her Grandma Estelle had tried to impress upon the young couple the need for a deep commitment to their relationship.
“Marriage is not an easy journey, Robin and Thomas, even between those who’ve been raised in the faith. You must both possess a singular belief your marriage will last forever. It’s a total commitment to a lifetime partnership. No do-over’s and no easy-outs allowed,” Grandma Estelle had spoken poignantly to the couple one night a few days before their wedding.
Her fiancée said, “Got it.”
“Thank you for the advice. Since you and Grandpa were married for sixty years, I believe you know what you’re talking about on the subject,” she whispered as she embraced her grandmother.
Robin’s young mind couldn’t comprehend anything besides being married to Thomas Bennett for years and years to come. She expected their marriage to be their own happily-ever-after. To her future regret, the young bride didn’t question the deeper meaning of her groom’s rude retort.
At the time, the couple’s pre-nuptial agenda did not include discussions of when and if they would start a family, their individual goals and dreams after college, or even where they would like to settle after college graduation.
After a brief honeymoon at Lake Tahoe, the two packed up Thomas’s car and headed to a small Christian college in Oklahoma to begin classes. They settled into a hectic life of college classes, Bible studies, and Thomas’s musical performances. In addition to her coursework, Robin worked at a grueling waitressing job to support the couple. She was expected to tackle all the necessary household chores on her own.
Time passed quickly and it appeared neither spouse took the time to examine the marriage too closely. More importantly, it did not seem to occur to them they should examine their relationship. Days, weeks, and months passed uneventfully. Amazingly, Robin was somehow able to keep up with her responsibilities while earning her degree in literature.
Unbeknownst to his wife, Thomas’s secret and all-consuming personal dream was to make it big in country music in Nashville. He was willing to sacrifice anything, including his marriage, to attain his dream. Robin sacrificed her leisure time to work crazy hours as a waitress in a busy diner on the highway so her husband could ‘practice’ and perform his original music at the college and surrounding churches and communities. Robin didn’t even pause to consider the sacrifices she was making. She was a loving wife who was willing and able to support and encourage her spouse in his goals
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