that same drug dealing scumbag that I had grown up with.
I kept my eyes down at the carpet as he left; he pulled the door quietly closed behind him. Instinctively I felt my stomach, I still hadn’t got my period, and the nerves were starting to play havoc with me. But I didn’t know how I would tell Dylan, let alone Tilly. I was going to have to lie, but I wasn’t sure if I was able to do that.
I was lost in thought, when Dylan came into my room, and sat next to me. He didn’t say anything, just sat there looking off into the distance, he looked like he was searching for the right words to say. The anger that had swelled to boiling point subsided the minute I saw him, and felt his closeness. My heart was breaking into millions of tiny pieces, but I knew I had to do what was right.
“It’s ok Dylan, Dad told me that he rang you. Thank you for coming back, but you belong to Tilly, not me” I said, my voice wavering.
He reached over and took my hand, but I snatched it back. He looked hurt, and I could see his eyes start to tear up, I couldn’t look at him, I couldn’t see him cry, because it would make my tears start again and I didn’t want that, I didn’t want him to see that.
“Mon, I meant what I said. I love you. I just don’t know how to do this, you and me. I want you, I think of you always, you are the girl I want, I just don’t know how to have you” he rubbed his face; I could see how tired he was.
My emotions started to twist like a tornado, and they threatened to take me out. I didn’t know what to say, or how to even begin to respond. Whilst talking to Dad I had resolved that I was going to end it with Dylan, that I would help Dad find a new house and move with him, to leave Dylan as a vacant memory to remember years later. I opened my mouth to tell him that we just couldn’t be, when the movement of Tilly suddenly appearing in my door jolted me and made me slam my mouth closed.
“There you two are”.
Tilly leapt onto the bed, between Dylan and me and put her arm around us both.
“My favourite man and you” she laughed. I smiled weakly, and stared down at the carpet, my mind and emotions were in turmoil.
“God, you’d think Dylan just broke up with you Mon, you’re so fucking mopey” she said, as she grabbed us both on the leg, “and after the fucking you got” she said as she looked over at Dylan “you should be ecstatic”. I could see the pained look on Dylan’s face as she spoke the words; it was the look of how I felt.
Tilly grabbed our hands as she jumped up off the bed, and pulled on our arms.
“Come on mopey and her highness, let’s go somewhere, I’m bored”
I sighed and let Tilly pull me up.
“Let’s go up the mountain” she said excitedly, “I haven’t been up there in ages”
Dylan and I looked over at each other. He nodded and walked to the door, I went to follow, but Tilly stopped me, her grin, spreading across her face.
“Oh Mon, isn’t this great? We made love at least three times last night, I have never had so many orgasms in a row, I guess all the practicing he’s been getting came in handy” she whispered.
I tried to smile, but my heart was seething. Thankfully she was so self-consumed that she didn’t notice the pain that was all over my face, she just grabbed my hand and led me out of the room. As we started off up the mountain, Tilly chattered away about every subject she could think about. The beauty of Tilly is that she could talk the leg off an iron pot, and she didn’t expect anyone to give input into her conversations, so I was able to sit in my anger in the passenger seat. While she sat, leaning against Dylan on the bench seat of the van, her hand on his leg, she looked up at him lovingly every now and then. The times that I did look at Dylan, he had a focused steely stare on the road.
“Oh this is great, like old times, my beautiful man” she cooed.
Dylan gave her a wan smile. I turned back to the passenger
I kept my eyes down at the carpet as he left; he pulled the door quietly closed behind him. Instinctively I felt my stomach, I still hadn’t got my period, and the nerves were starting to play havoc with me. But I didn’t know how I would tell Dylan, let alone Tilly. I was going to have to lie, but I wasn’t sure if I was able to do that.
I was lost in thought, when Dylan came into my room, and sat next to me. He didn’t say anything, just sat there looking off into the distance, he looked like he was searching for the right words to say. The anger that had swelled to boiling point subsided the minute I saw him, and felt his closeness. My heart was breaking into millions of tiny pieces, but I knew I had to do what was right.
“It’s ok Dylan, Dad told me that he rang you. Thank you for coming back, but you belong to Tilly, not me” I said, my voice wavering.
He reached over and took my hand, but I snatched it back. He looked hurt, and I could see his eyes start to tear up, I couldn’t look at him, I couldn’t see him cry, because it would make my tears start again and I didn’t want that, I didn’t want him to see that.
“Mon, I meant what I said. I love you. I just don’t know how to do this, you and me. I want you, I think of you always, you are the girl I want, I just don’t know how to have you” he rubbed his face; I could see how tired he was.
My emotions started to twist like a tornado, and they threatened to take me out. I didn’t know what to say, or how to even begin to respond. Whilst talking to Dad I had resolved that I was going to end it with Dylan, that I would help Dad find a new house and move with him, to leave Dylan as a vacant memory to remember years later. I opened my mouth to tell him that we just couldn’t be, when the movement of Tilly suddenly appearing in my door jolted me and made me slam my mouth closed.
“There you two are”.
Tilly leapt onto the bed, between Dylan and me and put her arm around us both.
“My favourite man and you” she laughed. I smiled weakly, and stared down at the carpet, my mind and emotions were in turmoil.
“God, you’d think Dylan just broke up with you Mon, you’re so fucking mopey” she said, as she grabbed us both on the leg, “and after the fucking you got” she said as she looked over at Dylan “you should be ecstatic”. I could see the pained look on Dylan’s face as she spoke the words; it was the look of how I felt.
Tilly grabbed our hands as she jumped up off the bed, and pulled on our arms.
“Come on mopey and her highness, let’s go somewhere, I’m bored”
I sighed and let Tilly pull me up.
“Let’s go up the mountain” she said excitedly, “I haven’t been up there in ages”
Dylan and I looked over at each other. He nodded and walked to the door, I went to follow, but Tilly stopped me, her grin, spreading across her face.
“Oh Mon, isn’t this great? We made love at least three times last night, I have never had so many orgasms in a row, I guess all the practicing he’s been getting came in handy” she whispered.
I tried to smile, but my heart was seething. Thankfully she was so self-consumed that she didn’t notice the pain that was all over my face, she just grabbed my hand and led me out of the room. As we started off up the mountain, Tilly chattered away about every subject she could think about. The beauty of Tilly is that she could talk the leg off an iron pot, and she didn’t expect anyone to give input into her conversations, so I was able to sit in my anger in the passenger seat. While she sat, leaning against Dylan on the bench seat of the van, her hand on his leg, she looked up at him lovingly every now and then. The times that I did look at Dylan, he had a focused steely stare on the road.
“Oh this is great, like old times, my beautiful man” she cooed.
Dylan gave her a wan smile. I turned back to the passenger
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