Read Online Restrain (Siren Book 3) by Katie de Long - Free Book Online
Authors: Katie de Long
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could have helped you—”
Fucking hell. I should've known Mil wouldn't be willing to wait and worry in the background. “You're not a delicate little blossom, but you might need that strength a different day. No point risking two of us when one will do.”
My limbs ache with every tiny, automatic movement, but the pain grounds me. It's pain that Milla and Allen won't have to feel. It's not that I don't think either of them could handle it, just—every mark on them wounds me anyways. I'd rather feel the injury once and get it over and done with, rather than feel it over and over again every time I see Allen's burned face, and Milla's scarred leg.
And, for how peaceful I've felt having Milla by my side again, it's only amplified the guilt over George tenfold. If I was half the leader Milla thinks I am, and Allen expects me to be, it would have been me in that ballast tank.
With the drive to act, to lead, comes awareness of my failures. The pain feels like a good penance.
And still, Milla works quietly, focused enough on her task that there's not a breath to spare for a kind word or a gentle touch. I don't know that I'd accept them if she offered them.
Finally, she looks up. “You still hoping to get drunk, Mr. Reckless?”
“You better believe it. You're gonna have to help me with the caps, though.”
“Do I have to do everything for you?” she quips in mock exasperation, and when we both chuckle, the tension in the air fades, taking the worst of my thoughts with it.
Chapter Twelve
Milla
I yell for Allen to help me get Calder to our makeshift bed. His feet are pretty torn up, and if he has to walk on the metal grates, it'll just reopen the scabs. As we settle him with his feet dangling over the edge of the pipe opening, he asks Allen if Allen wants to settle down here for a bit, and drink with us. I stiffen, not liking the idea of being trapped between the two of them with alcohol, even as injured as Calder is.
“No thanks—I've had my chip for ten years.”
An awkward moment passes as Calder wonders whether to say he was only joking, and use the alcohol for something useful. But he stands his ground, and shrugs.
Allen nods, and adds, “But you kids are welcome to. Just—try to keep the noise away from me; I don't want to be around that stuff. ”
Calder nods. “We'll stay out of your hair.”
“I've been thinking—there's that cistern on the other side of the room, and I should be able to dip our clothes into it from the second level. I've been hoping to wash mine. Do you want me to do yours, too?”
An undignified sigh leaves me. “ Hell fucking yes .” Everything itches from all the dirt and grime I caked onto the fabric—it was necessary, since they'd certainly have noticed a change of clothes. But that doesn't mean I have to like it. As much as I don't really want to be naked around them, this could be the only opportunity I have to feel even halfway clean clothes for a while.
Calder laughs. “Such a girly-girl.”
I punch him in the stomach, lightly. “I'll yank your stitches out.”
He laughs again, and Allen turns his back while I wiggle out of my shirt, sports bra, underwear, and pants. Calder raises his eyebrow, and glances from his own shirt to me, and I take the hint, and jerk the hem over his head. When we've gotten his boxers shimmied off him, too, I leave the clothes in his arms, and hide behind him. “You can turn around now,” he tells Allen, and passes him the clothes.
Allen carefully avoids looking at me, and hurries to start cleaning them. Only when I'm sure he's out of eyesight do I step forward, making a beeline for where we left the cooler, and the liquor.
“You're sure you wanna do this?” I ask again—I'd intended the liquor to be more for practical purposes than for relaxation.
“Shut up, and pour 'em, lady.” He grins at me, his eyes tracing my naked body as I unscrew the cap, and step close. “Body shots?”
“Fuck off.” I jerk the bottle
Fucking hell. I should've known Mil wouldn't be willing to wait and worry in the background. “You're not a delicate little blossom, but you might need that strength a different day. No point risking two of us when one will do.”
My limbs ache with every tiny, automatic movement, but the pain grounds me. It's pain that Milla and Allen won't have to feel. It's not that I don't think either of them could handle it, just—every mark on them wounds me anyways. I'd rather feel the injury once and get it over and done with, rather than feel it over and over again every time I see Allen's burned face, and Milla's scarred leg.
And, for how peaceful I've felt having Milla by my side again, it's only amplified the guilt over George tenfold. If I was half the leader Milla thinks I am, and Allen expects me to be, it would have been me in that ballast tank.
With the drive to act, to lead, comes awareness of my failures. The pain feels like a good penance.
And still, Milla works quietly, focused enough on her task that there's not a breath to spare for a kind word or a gentle touch. I don't know that I'd accept them if she offered them.
Finally, she looks up. “You still hoping to get drunk, Mr. Reckless?”
“You better believe it. You're gonna have to help me with the caps, though.”
“Do I have to do everything for you?” she quips in mock exasperation, and when we both chuckle, the tension in the air fades, taking the worst of my thoughts with it.
Chapter Twelve
Milla
I yell for Allen to help me get Calder to our makeshift bed. His feet are pretty torn up, and if he has to walk on the metal grates, it'll just reopen the scabs. As we settle him with his feet dangling over the edge of the pipe opening, he asks Allen if Allen wants to settle down here for a bit, and drink with us. I stiffen, not liking the idea of being trapped between the two of them with alcohol, even as injured as Calder is.
“No thanks—I've had my chip for ten years.”
An awkward moment passes as Calder wonders whether to say he was only joking, and use the alcohol for something useful. But he stands his ground, and shrugs.
Allen nods, and adds, “But you kids are welcome to. Just—try to keep the noise away from me; I don't want to be around that stuff. ”
Calder nods. “We'll stay out of your hair.”
“I've been thinking—there's that cistern on the other side of the room, and I should be able to dip our clothes into it from the second level. I've been hoping to wash mine. Do you want me to do yours, too?”
An undignified sigh leaves me. “ Hell fucking yes .” Everything itches from all the dirt and grime I caked onto the fabric—it was necessary, since they'd certainly have noticed a change of clothes. But that doesn't mean I have to like it. As much as I don't really want to be naked around them, this could be the only opportunity I have to feel even halfway clean clothes for a while.
Calder laughs. “Such a girly-girl.”
I punch him in the stomach, lightly. “I'll yank your stitches out.”
He laughs again, and Allen turns his back while I wiggle out of my shirt, sports bra, underwear, and pants. Calder raises his eyebrow, and glances from his own shirt to me, and I take the hint, and jerk the hem over his head. When we've gotten his boxers shimmied off him, too, I leave the clothes in his arms, and hide behind him. “You can turn around now,” he tells Allen, and passes him the clothes.
Allen carefully avoids looking at me, and hurries to start cleaning them. Only when I'm sure he's out of eyesight do I step forward, making a beeline for where we left the cooler, and the liquor.
“You're sure you wanna do this?” I ask again—I'd intended the liquor to be more for practical purposes than for relaxation.
“Shut up, and pour 'em, lady.” He grins at me, his eyes tracing my naked body as I unscrew the cap, and step close. “Body shots?”
“Fuck off.” I jerk the bottle
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