Red Hats

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Authors: Damon Wayans
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doll to play with. She lost Macy on a school trip, and her father wouldn’t buy another because he said she shouldn’t have brought it to school. Alma promised herself that when she grew up, she was going to buy herself every doll she had ever seen. Well, almost every one. She hated her father. The man never had a kind word to say, and she couldn’t remember him ever hugging her or telling Alma he loved her. A card came with the package.
    Dear Alma,
    It was a pleasure meeting you and Angel. All the sisters enjoyed spending a little time with Angel. You certainly named her right. She is an intelligent, sweet, and kind young woman who loves her mother. We know the apple doesn’t fall far from the tree. We noticed you collect antique dolls and thought you would like this one. May God continue to bless you and yours.
    In love,
    Sister Dee and the Red Hats!
    Alma liked the
card, because it had a beautiful red hat embroidered on the front of it. She liked how silky it felt, very classy. There was also an invitation to a book fair in the park that weekend.
    Alma tossed the invitation onto the kitchen table, thinking it and the doll were just a scam to get her to come and spend her hard-earned money at their book fair. She hated anyone who tried to hustle her. Did they think she was born yesterday? She told herself she would be damned if she’d go to that book fair.
    Alma sat at the kitchen table, sipping a hot cup of chamomile tea Angel had turned her on to in Texas. It relaxed her and didn’t make her feel groggy the way the pills did. Although she was drinking the tea, she felt cold. She noticed a breeze billow the curtains above the sink. As she went to close the window, Alma slipped on the multicolored rag rug and slammed back-first to the floor. She lay there unable to get up, moaning and asking God to help her. The moans turned to tears, and she asked God to take her.
    “What did I do to you, God? Why are you doing this to me? Why couldn’t you just let me die? What do you want from me?” she screamed to heaven.
    A strong breeze whisked into the kitchen, blowing the book-fair flyer off the table and onto the floor next to her.

chapter
seven
    Alma limped through Morningside Park
toward the group of Red Hats stationed at the book fair. Her body ached from the fall. She hadn’t felt this kind of full-body soreness since getting hit by a car at fourteen.
    Alma remembered that day clearly, because she was dressed up and skipping her way to Sunday school. Her mother had warned her about running in her good church clothes, so, wanting to be obedient, she’d split the difference between running and walking by skipping real fast. Alma felt she could justify it without technically being a liar. That was mistake number one. The bigger mistake was not going the normal route to church. She had found a nickel and wanted to stop and get some penny candiesto help pass the time at the two-hour sit-down. Back then, a nickel bought a lot of treats. Alma had a difficult time picking which candy she wanted—the shoestring licorice, Kool-Aid stick or the taffy and chocolate cherries—settling on one of each. She’d realized she was running late for service, and that would cost her a spanking, so after sucking down the Kool-Aid stick to give her the energy to skip the six blocks, she took a shortcut past the liquor store that had a German shepherd that was notorious for chasing anyone who ran past the store. The owner used to keep the door open to save on his air-conditioning bill. The mean old dog was kept on a long leash that stopped just short of the door. As Alma skipped past the store, the dog had given chase, barking loudly and almost giving her a heart attack. Alma had forgotten the dog was on its chain and couldn’t get out of the store. She had run into the street to avoid the long fangs coming her way. As soon as she stepped off the curb, a taxi had slammed into her, separating Alma from her candy.
    “So glad you could make

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