Read Online Purpose by Kristie Cook - Free Book Online Page A

and
swiveled my chair around to face her. She squatted in front of me,
her hands on my knees.
    “Honey—” she started.
    “It’s not him,” I repeated, louder now.
    “We don’t know—”
    “I said it’s not him!” I threw my hands to my
face. My body began trembling again. My head shook back and forth.
“It’s not him. I don’t know how I know. I just do. It’s not him, Mom. It can’t be!”
    She rubbed her hands against my thighs. “I
know, honey. I mean…I don’t know. I just know what you’re feeling.
I know it’s hard to believe.”
    “I don’t believe . I know!” I cried
into my hands. “Don’t you? Can’t you feel the truth?”
    She sighed. “You know I haven’t been able to
feel anything at all. And we haven’t been able to find anything.
We’ve tried to send soldiers in, but, if the Daemoni do still have
him, we have no idea where.”
    I stopped shaking as I listened. She’d never
given me so many details.
    “They lie so much, we never know what to
believe. And Rina’s heard nothing from her other sources about any
of this.” She sighed again. “And this video…we’ve never been able
to figure out if it’s him or not. Our people examined every frame
and couldn’t determine if it was even real, let alone who the
hostage was.”
    I dropped my hands from my face. “What do you
mean? You’ve seen this before ? You’ve known about this?”
    She grimaced. “Yes, honey. We’ve had this
video for a few years.”
    “A few years ?” My jaw dropped with
disbelief.
    “When the media did that whole character
bashing about your having Dorian so young and out of wedlock, we
were going to make an official statement. But then the Daemoni sent
this video, threatening to send it to the media worldwide if we
said anything at all. We decided it best for you and Dorian that we
just keep quiet. Ignore the rumors and let them run their course.”
She paused, then added quietly, “No one wanted you to see
this.”
    “Until now.”
    “We don’t know who sent it or why.”
    “It’s obvious why! The council wants me to
move on and they thought this would convince me. Well, they’re
wrong. It doesn’t mean a damn thing to me!”
     
    The next thing I knew, I sat at the head of
my bed, my arms wrapped around our wedding picture and my knees
drawn up in a ball. I didn’t remember if I had walked here
purposely or had fled to the refuge of my room. I didn’t even know
how long I’d been sitting here, rocking back and forth, whispering,
“No, no, no.”
    Before this, I’d already worked through the
first four steps of the grieving process, getting stuck on the
depression part…and sometimes moving backward. I had never reached
acceptance, though. The council—at least one person—thought they
could rush me into it with this video. But the idea back-fired. It
pushed me back. All the way back to denial. Because I absolutely
refused to believe my husband was beheaded in the video. In fact,
with the way the camera cut away from the hostage and then the
angle of the view…I couldn’t be certain there was even a head in
the sack rolling on the floor. The scene really could have been
staged, just theatrics, as Mom seemed to imply. But someone
obviously wanted me to see it…and to believe it.
    How stupid could they be? Did they really
think I would be so easily convinced? Our connection was too
strong. Or is it? I froze at this thought. I’d been losing
him in my memory and now even in my dreams. Our connection had
actually been quite weak lately. Mom knew that. Owen had probably
figured it out. They said they hadn’t told anyone, but now someone
on the council knew and tried to take advantage of my weakness.
Tried to shred my hope, as if slashing that grotesque sabre right
through my thread.
    I squeezed my eyes shut and saw the images in
the video. It could be convincing, actually. Quite convincing.
Especially with the Amadis mark on the hostage’s chest. And his
voice…beautiful and