bright-eyed waitress asks. “Sorry… I was just looking for something.” “Uh… you have money to pay for this right?” Asks my waitress, abruptly losing her charm. “Yes I have money!” I reply, my voice as snide as I can make it. “I’m sorry ma’am, I didn’t mean to imply tha-” “Oh yes you did!” I snap as I brush past her and head towards the cash register. I am really pissed now. Mark swiped my photos while I was taking my mega shower. At last he didn’t see the one hundred dollar bill that was hidden in the same place. I really need those pictures though to be really safe. Another thought occurs to me. I should take them back. That’s what I s hould be doing here, planning the snatch and grab of my photos. I’m pretty sure Mark will keep at least one. He probably had to give up all his pictures as well as anything that could link him to the club so I seriously doubt he’ll give up these. I go out to my car and start it up. The sun is about to make an appearance so I may as well look for a place to have coffee; real coffee, not that crap at Denny’s. After a few minutes of driving around I locate a Pete’s coffee but it’s not open yet. I get out and go up to the door. The sign says it opens at six. That’s a forty minute wait. I get back into my car to wait and think but I find it impossible to do just that. I end up getting out of the car and pace about until the door opens. Once inside I snuggle up to a cup of coffee and call Blade. “Who is this?” A groggy voice asks. “Can I come over?” “Jen, is that you?” He asks. “Yes it’s me! There’s been some trouble. Can I come over?” “Uh yeah of course. Come on over. You know how to get here?” “I’m not too familiar with Gold Hill. Gimme the address and I’ll GPS my way there.” He gives me the address and twenty minutes later I’m parking next to his massive Harley. He opens the door on the first knock. “You look terrible, what happened?” He asks sharply. “Fuck you very much. I’ve just been shot at and I shot some dude and got blood and brains in my hair and puked all over the place. Oh and I was nearly raped but Mark bailed me out and almost attacked me before two guys busted in shooting at us. I saved his life by the way.” “Why’d you do that?” He asks. “What? Over everything I just told you and the part you have anything to say something about is to ask why I bothered to save a human being’s life?” “Sorry…so are you hurt?” He asks, properly chastised. “Yes…I mean no, but it was awful.” “I’m so sorry.” He replies, shutting the front door and taking me into his strong arms. The second his arms are surrounding me I start to feel safe. His smell alone takes me back to the best times with him two years ago and it’s no surprise the spell he has over me. I have never felt so safe and cared for. Not even my own parents could give me this kind of peace. “Come into the kitchen, I put a pot of coffee on.” I follow him into the kitchen where he pours me a steaming cup of black coffee. “Tell me what happened Jen and don’t leave out a thing no matter how insignificant it appears to be.” At first the words come slowly and haltingly but as I get going they just start spilling, no spewing out until I’m reduced into an ugly mess of tears. I thought that when I came back my life would be calm and full of love. Instead it’s been nothing but violence. One more time I have this strong desire to return to Belize, Blade or no Blade. I just don’t know how much more of this I can take. Its changed me; this violence. I’ve become hardened, cold, and almost callous. This is not me, I complain to Blade. “No it’s not all of who you are, but the ability and the desire to protect yourself is no small thing. Many people are not able to pick up a weapon even if it is to save themselves or even their family. It’s not a bad thing Jen.” “To me it is. I’m not