she said. 'Well, Mia, I think it is commendable that you and your friends have
decided not to chase boys. However, if a boy leaves a nice message on the answering machine like
Michael did, it could hardly be construed as chasing for you to do the polite thing and return his call.'
I thought about this. My mom was probably right. I mean, it isn't as if Michael has a crazy wife in the
attic. The Fifth
Avenue apartment where the Moscovitzes live doesn't even have an attic, so far as I know.
'OK,' I said, setting down the clothes I'd been putting away. 'I guess I could return his call.' My heart
was swelling at the
very idea. In a minute - less than a minute, if I could get my mom out of my room fast enough - I'd be
talking to Michael!
And there wouldn't be that weird swooshing sound there always is when you call from across die ocean.
Because there
was no ocean separating us! Just Washington Square Park. 'Returning calls probably doesn't count as
chasing. That would probably be OK.'
My mom, who was sitting on the end of my bed, just shook her head.
'Really, Mia,' she said. 'You know I don't like to contradict your grandmother ...' This was the biggest lie
I'd heard since the Prince of Liechtenstein told me I waltzed divinely, but I let it slide, on account of
Mom's condition. '. . . but I really don't
think you should be playing mind games with boys. Particularly a boy you care about. Particularly a boy
like Michael.'
'Mom, if I want to spend the rest of my life with him, I have to play games with Michael,' I explained to
her, patiently.
'I certainly can't tell him the truth. If he were ever to learn the depths of my passion for him, he'd run like
a startled fawn.'
My mom looked stunned. A what?'
'A startled fawn,' I explained. 'See, Tina told herboyfriend Dave Farouq El-Abar how she really
feels about him, and he
pulled a total David Caruso on her.'
My mom blinked. A who?'
'David Caruso,' I said. I felt sorry for my mom. Clearly she had only managed to snag Mr. Gianini by the
skin of her teeth.
I couldn't believe she didn't know this stuff. 'You know, he disappeared for a really long time. Dave only
resurfaced when
Tina managed to scrounge Wresdemania tickets for the Garden. And ever since, Tina says things have
been really awkward.' Done unpacking, I shooed Fat Louie out of the suitcase, closed it, and put it on
the floor. Then I sat next to my mom on the bed. 'Mom,' I said. 'I do not want that to happen to me and
Michael. I love Michael more than anything in the entire world, except for you and Dad and Fat Louie.'
I just said the you and Dad part to be polite. I think I love Michael more than I love my mom and dad. It
sounds terrible
to say, but I can't help it, it is just how I feel.
But I will never love anyone or anything as much as I love Fat Louie.
'So don't you see?' I said to her. 'What Michael and I have, I don't want to mess it up. He's my Romeo
in black jeans.' Even though of course I have never seen Michael in black jeans. But I am sure he has
some. It is just that we have a dress code
at our school, so usually when I see him he is in grey flannel pants, as that is part of our uniform.
It seemed to take my mom a minute to digest all this. When she had, all she said was, 'I respect that you
want to take things with Michael slowly, Mia. But I do think that if you haven't seen a boy in a month,
and he leaves a message for you, the
decent thing to do is to call him back. If you don't, I think you can pretty much guarantee he is going to
run. And not like a startled fawn, either.'
I blinked at my mom. She had a point. I saw then that Grandmere's scheme — you know, of always
keeping the man you
love guessing as to whether or not you love him back — had some pitfalls. Such as, he could just decide
you don't like him, and take off, and maybe fall in love with some other girl of whose affection he could
be assured, like Judith Gershner,
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