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fires.”
    Robbie looks a bit put out.
    â€œI’m going to see if I can find anything else to burn,” he says, standing up.
    As I watch him go, I almost feel guilty. But not quite. Robbie’s getting a taste of his own medicine. He’s done it to me plenty of times.
    Gemma hands me the vodka and I take a swig before passing it on to Steph. Then we get back to talking.
    It’s an unusual conversation. Not because we’re talking about anything weird. It’s just that after the ropey start, I’m finding myself telling her all types of things that I wouldn’t normally come out with. Personal stuff. Stuff that I don’t talk much to the lads about because they’d call me a ponce. Things I enjoy doing. Writing. Sketching. Watching old films.
    It’s not one-way traffic. I’m getting to know all about Steph. She plays the clarinet. She goes to gym classes. She likes old films too. Her dad separated from her mum when Steph was twelve and she isn’t in touch with him any more. It’s all getting pretty deep.
    I decide to take a chance.
    â€œShall I tell you something embarrassing?”
    Steph hooks a tendril of hair behind her ear. I notice her fingernails are painted black.
    â€œWhat’s that?” she asks.
    â€œThis sounds mad,” I say. “But I reckon this is the first time I’ve had a proper conversation with a girl.”
    Steph nods, encouraging me to carry on. If what I’m saying is embarrassing, she’s not going to make me feel bad about it.
    â€œI mean, I’ve got a sister, Beth, who’s two years older than me, and we get on alright. But we never actually talk about anything. We just mess around and try to get each other in trouble.”
    Steph nods again.
    â€œWhat about girlfriends?” she asks.
    â€œWell, you know. I’ve taken girls out to the cinema and for meals and shopping in the Ainsdale Centre in Letchford. And, don’t get me wrong, it was okay. But I didn’t really have a connection with any of them. I didn’t feel like I could open up and be myself.”
    â€œAnd you do with me?”
    My breath sticks in my throat. I’m going red. I’m hoping that, in the flickering light of the fire, it won’t be too obvious.
    â€œEr, yeah,” I say. There’s no going back. I’ve started talking about feeling a connection and opening up . I sound like one of those crappy Self Help books my mum reads. If Steph takes the piss now, that’s the whole weekend ruined.
    But she doesn’t let me down.
    â€œThat’s nice,” she says, looking right at me. “I feel like I can talk to you too.”
    I get a surge of pride. That means something.
    Steph pokes at the stones between her feet. She’s thinking. Eventually she looks up.
    â€œYou told me something you’re not proud of. I should do the same.”
    For a split second I go cold.
    â€œYou don’t have to,” I say.
    There’s an odd look on her face.
    â€œYou’re going to think I’m making this up,” she says. “But I’m not. It’s awful. I don’t know why I’m telling you, to be honest.”
    â€œYou don’t have to,” I say again. I’m worried now. I don’t want to have my illusions shattered. Whatever it is, Steph’s going to get it off her chest.
    â€œNot last summer,” she says, “the summer before, I got a police caution.”
    I’m amazed, but I try not to let it show.
    â€œWhat for?”
    Steph shakes her head in disbelief.
    â€œTwoccing a car. Taking Without Owner’s Consent. A BMW 3 Series. Wedged the door, then used the aerial to undo the locks. After that, I hotwired it. I drove round for a while, then I got pulled over. Don’t know why I did it. Bored I suppose.”
    I let this information filter in. It’s a bit of a surprise, but it’s not as bad as it could have been. Steph looks uncertain.