down the beach,
hand in hand, smiling, laughing together and seeming utterly happy. No one notices
me, or they choose not to. No one sees the lonely girl on the sand, fighting
back tears, overcome by guilt. I let my sister drown. I let her die.
After a while, I suck back in the pain and
stabilize it there in my heart once more. It’s locked away enough to get me
through the rest of the night. Then I stand, brush sand off my clothes, and
start back up the beach.
Briskly, I walk home. By the time I get back,
Mom’s car is in the driveway. My parents are sitting in the dark, snuggled up
together on the couch when I enter the front door. The black and white lights
of the movie shine on their faces. They look over at me as I start up the
stairs.
“You okay, honey?” Mom calls out.
My throat feels dry and it burns from all the
internal fighting I did back on the beach, trying to suppress my cries. I have
to clear my throat before answering, “I’m fine.”
Then I continue up the stairs to avoid her
coming out of the living room to check on me, to see if I’m really fine. I slip
into my room and shut the door, not even bothering to turn on the light as I
get out of my clothes and hop in the shower, washing off whatever grains of
sand is left on me.
I dry off and crawl into bed naked, pulling the
covers over me. Moments later, I remember I have a cellphone and haven’t spoken
to my best friend all day. That’s odd for us.
When I reach down to my jeans shorts on the
floor that I just took off, I pull my phone out of the pocket. I have two
missed calls and three text messages, all from Nate, telling me to come to
Ryan’s party tomorrow night after work, and that I have to wear a bikini even
if I don’t want to go in the pool. His messages are demanding, but I let it
slide. I want to be a good girlfriend. I want us to have a fun summer. I want
us to work.
ELEVEN
Micah
“WANNA COME with us to a party?” Claudia asks me
the moment I walk out of the restaurant to head home.
Slowing down, I reach my hand behind my neck and
massage it, considering whether or not I should. “I don’t know.” I’m hesitant
about hanging out at a party with a bunch of kids I don’t know. Even if I’m
interested in making friends here, there are certain things I don’t want to
join in on.
Claudia leans her head to one side and does the
puppy-dog face as she pleads, “Please come, it’ll be fun.” She slants and looks
over her shoulder at Reign, standing by the passenger door of the jeep. “Won’t
it?” Claudia asks her.
Reign straightens as she glances across at me,
unsure whether she should help her friend lure me to this party. She chips at
her nail polish and twists her mouth, looking from Claudia to me. “Um…I guess
it’ll be fun.”
There’s something about her demeanor. She’s been
kinda off all day too. I wonder what’s up.
“See?” Claudia perks up, bringing her attention
back to me—her eyes lighting up with excitement. “We both want you to
come.”
Honestly, I’m not ready for the night to end as
yet. Like Wednesday, I want to hang out with Reign a bit more, even if her
friend’s around. And Claudia is all right, I guess.
“Come on, Micah,” she begs. “It’s Friday.”
“Um…okay,” I say.
We pile into the jeep and take off from the
restaurant. Several minutes later, we approach a waterfront property by
Easton’s Beach. Claudia drives inside the black iron gates and parks alongside
a ton of fancy looking cars. She hops out first. I notice Reign sighs before
getting out as well.
I follow the girls down a stoned path that loops
around to the back of the house and to steps that continue down to the beach.
The second I see the crowd, I regret coming. Most of the guys seem to be
wasted, spraying beer all over the girls and pushing them into the pool. I
didn’t know this was going to be a late night pool party.
Claudia quickly hauls off her cover-up and
reveals her dark
hand in hand, smiling, laughing together and seeming utterly happy. No one notices
me, or they choose not to. No one sees the lonely girl on the sand, fighting
back tears, overcome by guilt. I let my sister drown. I let her die.
After a while, I suck back in the pain and
stabilize it there in my heart once more. It’s locked away enough to get me
through the rest of the night. Then I stand, brush sand off my clothes, and
start back up the beach.
Briskly, I walk home. By the time I get back,
Mom’s car is in the driveway. My parents are sitting in the dark, snuggled up
together on the couch when I enter the front door. The black and white lights
of the movie shine on their faces. They look over at me as I start up the
stairs.
“You okay, honey?” Mom calls out.
My throat feels dry and it burns from all the
internal fighting I did back on the beach, trying to suppress my cries. I have
to clear my throat before answering, “I’m fine.”
Then I continue up the stairs to avoid her
coming out of the living room to check on me, to see if I’m really fine. I slip
into my room and shut the door, not even bothering to turn on the light as I
get out of my clothes and hop in the shower, washing off whatever grains of
sand is left on me.
I dry off and crawl into bed naked, pulling the
covers over me. Moments later, I remember I have a cellphone and haven’t spoken
to my best friend all day. That’s odd for us.
When I reach down to my jeans shorts on the
floor that I just took off, I pull my phone out of the pocket. I have two
missed calls and three text messages, all from Nate, telling me to come to
Ryan’s party tomorrow night after work, and that I have to wear a bikini even
if I don’t want to go in the pool. His messages are demanding, but I let it
slide. I want to be a good girlfriend. I want us to have a fun summer. I want
us to work.
ELEVEN
Micah
“WANNA COME with us to a party?” Claudia asks me
the moment I walk out of the restaurant to head home.
Slowing down, I reach my hand behind my neck and
massage it, considering whether or not I should. “I don’t know.” I’m hesitant
about hanging out at a party with a bunch of kids I don’t know. Even if I’m
interested in making friends here, there are certain things I don’t want to
join in on.
Claudia leans her head to one side and does the
puppy-dog face as she pleads, “Please come, it’ll be fun.” She slants and looks
over her shoulder at Reign, standing by the passenger door of the jeep. “Won’t
it?” Claudia asks her.
Reign straightens as she glances across at me,
unsure whether she should help her friend lure me to this party. She chips at
her nail polish and twists her mouth, looking from Claudia to me. “Um…I guess
it’ll be fun.”
There’s something about her demeanor. She’s been
kinda off all day too. I wonder what’s up.
“See?” Claudia perks up, bringing her attention
back to me—her eyes lighting up with excitement. “We both want you to
come.”
Honestly, I’m not ready for the night to end as
yet. Like Wednesday, I want to hang out with Reign a bit more, even if her
friend’s around. And Claudia is all right, I guess.
“Come on, Micah,” she begs. “It’s Friday.”
“Um…okay,” I say.
We pile into the jeep and take off from the
restaurant. Several minutes later, we approach a waterfront property by
Easton’s Beach. Claudia drives inside the black iron gates and parks alongside
a ton of fancy looking cars. She hops out first. I notice Reign sighs before
getting out as well.
I follow the girls down a stoned path that loops
around to the back of the house and to steps that continue down to the beach.
The second I see the crowd, I regret coming. Most of the guys seem to be
wasted, spraying beer all over the girls and pushing them into the pool. I
didn’t know this was going to be a late night pool party.
Claudia quickly hauls off her cover-up and
reveals her dark
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