Read Online One Year (New & Lengthened Edition) by Charlotte Byrd - Free Book Online Page A

burst in and apologize. At least talk to me. But no one comes in. So instead, I change into my pajamas, take off my bra, and put in my headphones.
    I listen to Adele’s song, “Hello.” I turn up the volume and scream on the inside, lying on my bed and staring at the ceiling.
    What is this feeling that pollutes the soul after a break up? It’s gives you an upset stomach and clogs your ears and makes the whole world hazy and a little dark.
    And then it hits me.
    I’m falling.
    I feel like I’m falling and I’ve been feeling like I have been falling ever since we broke up.
    It’s strange to be in perpetual motion without the end in sight. It’s like I’d fallen off a building (or maybe I jumped) and have been falling ever since. There were a few moments of slowing down; I wasn’t falling at full speed up until now. But now, I’m falling even faster. Perhaps that means that I’m getting closer to Earth? Closer to a collision?
    I close my eyes. Open them. Stare at the ceiling. Flip back on my stomach and look out of the window. Days are getting shorter now. It’s still early, but it’s already twilight. Somewhere in the distance, I hear an ambulance racing down Broadway, its sirens getting closer and closer. I turn up the music.
    Tristan and I haven’t talked much since our kiss. I didn’t expect that we would have, but I kind of wanted him to try. Still, once he had avoided me for a few days, I gave up entirely. That kiss was just a blimp in our otherwise non-existent relationship. But still, I didn’t expect him to start dating so soon. Why couldn’t he just sleep around like a normal single, college guy? And why did he have to date Tea? I like Tea. A lot.

16
    D ear Tea ,
    Thank you for being my friend. I’m so sorry that your new boyfriend is my old boyfriend. Both of us could’ve avoided a lot of heartache and disappointment and anxiety if we had just revealed his name. Tristan. It’s such a small word. And yet, it’s impact on our lives, is quite grand. Isn’t it? Hard to believe, really.
    Well, I’m writing you this thank you letter to let you know that I’m letting go. That kiss Tristan and I had shared two weeks ago might have meant something, but I’m not going to let it. I’m putting him behind me. Once and for all. You can have him. He’s a great guy, but he’s no longer my guy. I know that. I’m trying to move on. No, not trying. Like that cliché line goes, there is no trying. There’s just doing and not doing. So I’m moving on. From this moment on.
    So, to you, Tea, I say thank you. Thank you for being there. Thank you for finally making me realize that this is over. And that I’m going to be okay.

    L ove ,
    Alice

    I put my pen down . I should be writing my Great Gatsby paper. It’s due in three days and it doesn’t even have a thesis statement. But this thank you card was more important. I’ve been thinking about Tea and Tristan ever since I saw them together yesterday. Something about writing this thank you card finally made me feel like everything was going to be all right.
    “Okay, girlie.” Juliet walks in with two Nordstrom bags. “Enough moping. Does he love me? Will he love me? What does that kiss mean? Oh no, now he has a girlfriend. Can he love me again?”
    It’s hard to keep secrets in the dorm, and it’s especially hard to keep secrets from Juliet. I can’t help but smile.
    “I know. I’m pathetic, right?” I say.
    “Maybe just a little. But you’re not a lost cause.”
    “Good. I like the sound of that.”
    “Are you ready then? To prove yourself?”
    “Yeah, sure.” I shrug.
    Juliet doesn’t look convinced. “Dylan’s birthday’s this weekend and he’s throwing a big party at his father’s place on Central Park.”
    “Are you sure? I didn’t think he was allowed there.”
    Juliet stares at me, dumbfounded. “I tell you about our roommate’s birthday party and all you can do is focus on the location and whether or not he’s allowed