careful.”
“Dove, caution and restraint are my
middle names.”
She made an unconvinced sound.
In the years of their relationship,
she had never known him to be either cautious or restrained . Not
that he was usually stupid or reckless, just that he sometimes let his own
gentle nature and tendency towards “ Adventure! ” get the best of him.
But he was a good man.
And the only person on the face of
this earth she trusted entirely.
The man’s deep, overly cheerful,
but somehow still melancholy, voice was the one constant in her life. He was
her strong arm, when she needed it. Her shoulder to cry on, when she needed
that. And everything in between.
He was her companion.
Ransom didn’t really remember much
about herself.
She came into this world somewhere
around five years ago and everything else before that was a total blank. As such,
she had quite literally known Uriah her entire life.
He’d been there every minute.
A protector and a friend and a
partner.
There was something about the man
which just made everything… better. Like, no matter how bad things got
for them, as long as he was there, it was almost amusing. Like she didn’t have
to worry about it, because together, they’d get it done. And in the meanwhile,
she could sit with him and laugh at the crazy stuff which kept happening to
them.
Fatalistic but entertained.
But she depended on him far too
much.
She knew that.
She used him as a crutch, and
Ransom was not the kind of person who liked to be dependent on anyone. At
least, she didn’t think she was, anyway. She actually had no way of knowing
what kind of person she’d been before five years ago.
And she didn’t much care.
Whoever that woman was, Ransom believed
in self-sufficiency now.
And… Uriah was her world. Both
metaphorically and almost entirely literally.
She needed him. She depended on
him for pretty much everything in her life. And she didn’t want to be
someone’s charity case. The woman they pitied.
So, she kept her distance from
him. Because he already had everything else in her life. And he had to
know that.
If she allowed herself to feel
something more for him…
That would be bad.
He’d have all of her.
She’d have no defense.
Not that she really worried about
Uriah betraying her or suddenly deciding to do something utterly reprehensible,
just that… Ransom wasn’t someone who liked feeling exposed. She liked keeping
a nice, safe emotional distance from people and situations. It just made
things easier for her. It was comfortable not having to invest in anything.
It felt like she’d always done that, even before her memory troubles. The idea
of letting someone in was… terrifying.
And the only thing in this world
which could consistently break through her defenses was her partner.
The man was strong, and kind, and
funny. And when he touched her… It sent shockwaves through her system, which
threatened to rip her apart and take down all of the barriers she had carefully
built up around herself. She both feared and desired that sensation. It made
her feel so vulnerable, but… also kind of safe.
Which, again, made her feel
pathetic and dependent on him.
She didn’t want to risk that.
She couldn’t .
The thought of it frightened her.
Cut through the desire she had for him, and burned her down to the bone.
Besides, what if she did one day
get her memory back and somehow forgot the last five years as a result… how could
she do that to Uriah? How could she ask him to invest anything in her, when
she wasn’t even sure who she was?
She could hurt him and she wasn’t
sure she could live with that.
Or she could get him hurt.
How could you handle it if you lost
your best friend and the love of your life in the same day? He’d take your
heart and soul with him and leave you with nothing. You’d be empty, helpless,
and alone.
And worse, what… what if you gave
him everything you
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