Read Online No Second Chances by Marissa Farrar - Free Book Online
Authors: Marissa Farrar
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couldn’t stay on the floor, crying. I still needed to pee, badly. The last thing I needed was to have an accident on top of everything else. That would be the ultimate kick in the teeth.
Pushing myself to sitting, I angrily brushed the tears from my cheeks with the back of my hand and reached for my prosthesis. I wished I’d been allowed to take my new pin lock leg home, but for the moment I had to deal with the awkwardness of the rubber sleeve again. I attached the leg to my stump, and then used the side of the bed to pull myself to standing.
Through the drapes filtered the first light of morning, and for that I was relieved. At least I wouldn’t have to try to get back to sleep again.
I hobbled to the bathroom to relieve myself, and then came back into the bedroom to grab my robe. My eyes settled on the small slip of paper on my nightstand.
A couple of days had passed since I’d last seen Cole.
I should have thrown his number away, but instead it sat on my nightstand, drawing my eye every time I walked into the room. When I finally managed to sleep, it was the last thing I stared at before my eyes slipped shut, and it was the first thing I saw when they opened again.
I didn’t want to want to see Cole again. If anything, I wanted to hate him so deeply that nothing would ever break through my hate—not the intense blue eyes, or the full lips, or the stubbled jaw. But more than how he looked now, I found it was my memories I battled with more. The time we’d spent as a couple had been the happiest, most intense time of my life, before it had all crashed and burned. Cole had brought me to life all those years ago, when I’d believed there had been no more to living than reading and trying to manage my dad’s behavior. I’d loved him, and I didn’t think a love like the one I’d had for Cole Devonport when I was seventeen years old ever went away. It faded, sure, especially because of the way it had ended, but any kind of emotion that powerful created who we were as adults. It had shaped and molded me, and at the time I’d believed he and I were going to spend the rest of our lives together. He obviously hadn’t felt the same way, but now here he was as an adult, asking to spend time with me again, and still I was drawn to him.
I needed to remember that the only reason he wanted me around was out of guilt. He felt guilty for what had happened back then, and he felt guilty because he was probably grossed out at the idea of my stump. He certainly didn’t want to be around me out of any kind of romantic notion, and I wouldn’t be able to handle it if he was.
Who the hell wanted to date a girl who only had one leg?
***
Later that morning, my dad took an unexpected trip out to the store, so I had the house to myself. It didn’t happen often, and I was enjoying the peace and quiet. It wasn’t to last, however, as my doorbell sounded. My heart did a stupid little skip and hop. Would Cole come to the house to see me? No, I chided myself. Why did he seem to always be at the front of my mind lately?
“Coming,” I yelled toward the front door, knowing it took me longer than normal to haul myself out of the couch, and then get to the front door. Like an elderly person, I managed to stand, using the edges of the seat to half pull, half push myself up. I did my lurching walk, hoping whoever it was hadn’t given up and left already.
I opened the door and my mouth dropped in surprise.
Two women and a boy of about seven stood on my doorstep. Both women plastered on wide smiles as they saw me.
“Gabi, hi!”
My gaze moved from one to the other in surprise. “Jasmine,” I said. “Taylor. I wasn’t expecting to see you.”
Jasmine gave an apologetic smile. “I know. Sorry for dropping by unannounced. We should have called first, but we heard you were back in town and we just happened to be in the area.” She held her hands out either side of her. “So here we are.”
“Yeah, so here you
Pushing myself to sitting, I angrily brushed the tears from my cheeks with the back of my hand and reached for my prosthesis. I wished I’d been allowed to take my new pin lock leg home, but for the moment I had to deal with the awkwardness of the rubber sleeve again. I attached the leg to my stump, and then used the side of the bed to pull myself to standing.
Through the drapes filtered the first light of morning, and for that I was relieved. At least I wouldn’t have to try to get back to sleep again.
I hobbled to the bathroom to relieve myself, and then came back into the bedroom to grab my robe. My eyes settled on the small slip of paper on my nightstand.
A couple of days had passed since I’d last seen Cole.
I should have thrown his number away, but instead it sat on my nightstand, drawing my eye every time I walked into the room. When I finally managed to sleep, it was the last thing I stared at before my eyes slipped shut, and it was the first thing I saw when they opened again.
I didn’t want to want to see Cole again. If anything, I wanted to hate him so deeply that nothing would ever break through my hate—not the intense blue eyes, or the full lips, or the stubbled jaw. But more than how he looked now, I found it was my memories I battled with more. The time we’d spent as a couple had been the happiest, most intense time of my life, before it had all crashed and burned. Cole had brought me to life all those years ago, when I’d believed there had been no more to living than reading and trying to manage my dad’s behavior. I’d loved him, and I didn’t think a love like the one I’d had for Cole Devonport when I was seventeen years old ever went away. It faded, sure, especially because of the way it had ended, but any kind of emotion that powerful created who we were as adults. It had shaped and molded me, and at the time I’d believed he and I were going to spend the rest of our lives together. He obviously hadn’t felt the same way, but now here he was as an adult, asking to spend time with me again, and still I was drawn to him.
I needed to remember that the only reason he wanted me around was out of guilt. He felt guilty for what had happened back then, and he felt guilty because he was probably grossed out at the idea of my stump. He certainly didn’t want to be around me out of any kind of romantic notion, and I wouldn’t be able to handle it if he was.
Who the hell wanted to date a girl who only had one leg?
***
Later that morning, my dad took an unexpected trip out to the store, so I had the house to myself. It didn’t happen often, and I was enjoying the peace and quiet. It wasn’t to last, however, as my doorbell sounded. My heart did a stupid little skip and hop. Would Cole come to the house to see me? No, I chided myself. Why did he seem to always be at the front of my mind lately?
“Coming,” I yelled toward the front door, knowing it took me longer than normal to haul myself out of the couch, and then get to the front door. Like an elderly person, I managed to stand, using the edges of the seat to half pull, half push myself up. I did my lurching walk, hoping whoever it was hadn’t given up and left already.
I opened the door and my mouth dropped in surprise.
Two women and a boy of about seven stood on my doorstep. Both women plastered on wide smiles as they saw me.
“Gabi, hi!”
My gaze moved from one to the other in surprise. “Jasmine,” I said. “Taylor. I wasn’t expecting to see you.”
Jasmine gave an apologetic smile. “I know. Sorry for dropping by unannounced. We should have called first, but we heard you were back in town and we just happened to be in the area.” She held her hands out either side of her. “So here we are.”
“Yeah, so here you
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