Read Online No Regrets by Claire Kent - Free Book Online

my birthday.
    It was a really nice evening. My friends were all fun and entertaining, and I got a number of very thoughtful presents—as well as a few funny ones. There was good food and good wine and good company. I had nothing to complain about for my thirty-ninth birthday.
    But I was leaving the restaurant at nine-thirty and thinking about Josh.
    I hadn’t called him yet.
    I’d thought about it, of course. I thought about it every night. But every time I reached for the phone and started to dial, I’d feel weird and nervous and just didn’t do it.
    It was honestly a little annoying that he’d left it totally in my court. I didn’t like it to be in my court. If a man wanted to get together with me—for sex or anything else—then he should get the balls up to call me himself.
    That wasn’t the situation with Josh, though. He definitely wasn’t sitting around brooding about me, hoping for me to call. I was just casual, and so he could take me or leave me easily.
    Maybe I just wasn’t cut out for casual affairs. I took things too seriously.
    Still, though, I leaned back against the seat of my car and thought about calling him.
    He was the one who’d told me to call him, so it wasn’t like it was out of the blue. And the two nights we’d spent together had been really amazing.
    And, if I didn’t call him, I’d have to go home to an empty apartment.
    Without even Polly waiting for me, wagging her tail with irrepressible joy at greeting me.
    I wasn’t depressed about my birthday. I’d had a good night. But if I went home without even trying to call Josh, I knew I would regret it.
    And I was determined not to regret what I could do something about.
    So I took out my phone and his business card, which had been in my purse all week, and I dialed the number quickly, before I could second-guess myself.
    A cold wash of fear spread out through my arms and legs as I heard the rings. It was a Thursday evening. He might not even be home. He might be out with someone else. He might be tired. He might not want some random woman calling him up and asking for him to pleasure her.
    I was so nervous on the fourth ring I hung up. There was no way in hell I was going to try to leave a message. I sat and stared at my phone, feeling like an idiot.
    What the hell was wrong with me? Why was even something so simple so hard? I should be grown up enough to call up a guy without having a panic attack.
    I started my car, feeling let down for the first time all evening.
    Then my phone rang, startling me so much I almost jumped.
    I glanced down and saw that it was Josh, calling me back.
    My nerves surged back up into my throat, but I made myself connect the call and say, “Hello.”
    “Hey. It’s Josh. Did you just call me?”
    “Yeah. Yeah, I did.”
    “Sorry. I couldn’t find my phone.”
    “You’d lost it?”
    “No. Not really. It was in my pocket when I took off my pants, so it took me a minute to find it when I heard it ring.”
    “You already took your pants off?” The question really did make sense to me. After all, it wasn’t even ten in the evening, and I couldn’t imagine he’d already gotten ready for bed. But, when I heard myself say it, I wanted to cringe.
    “Well, you see, I was hoping you’d call, so I wanted to get my pants off early so I’d be ready.”
    The words were so matter-of-factly spoken that they took me a minute to register. Then I burst into helpless laughter. “Very farsighted of you,” I said at last, when I’d caught my breath. I was smiling like an idiot on the phone, but at least that was better than feeling like an idiot.
    “So why are you calling? Is it what I’m thinking?”
    He didn’t sound surprised, uncomfortable, or reluctant. In fact, he sounded rather pleased. It gave me courage enough to say, “Maybe. It depends on what you’re thinking.”
    “I’m thinking that I hope you don’t want to wait until the weekend, since I’m doing absolutely nothing right