Read Online No Going Back by Lyndon Stacey - Free Book Online

behaviour. If this was a cry for help, Daniel was going to do his damnedest to make sure he got it.
    â€˜Is it something I’ve said or done?’
    Again the headshake.
    â€˜Well, can I help? You know I’ll do anything I can.’
    â€˜Anything?’ Drew looked up with hope in his eyes. His unruly brown fringe flopped across his forehead and he pushed it away with impatient fingers. ‘Do you mean that?’
    â€˜Of course. If I can.’
    â€˜Then can I come and live with you? Please, Dad? Please?’
    Oh God! Anything , he’d said. Yes, anything but that. He’d walked right into that one. But to be fair Drew hadn’t mentioned it since the early days of their separation, and he’d assumed the boy had accepted the idea as impossible.
    â€˜Drew, listen . . .’
    â€˜You said anything! Dad, please!’
    â€˜You know I can’t. It’s not possible.’
    â€˜Why?’
    â€˜Because I haven’t got a proper house, because I’m working six days a week, because you’ve got school, and not least because your mother wouldn’t let you.’
    â€˜She couldn’t stop me if I just went.’
    â€˜Don’t you believe it! She’d take me to court to get you back, and I’m afraid she’d win.’
    â€˜But we could go away somewhere,’ Drew persisted with the easy confidence of an eight-year-old.
    â€˜And live on what? Come on, Drew, you know it’s not that simple.’
    â€˜You could join the police again, or drive lorries. Please, Dad. I hate living with Amanda.’
    â€˜ Amanda? ’ Daniel was momentarily distracted. ‘Who told you to call her that?’
    â€˜She did.’
    â€˜Since when?’
    â€˜A few weeks ago.’
    â€˜And do you like it?’
    â€˜It’s a bit weird,’ Drew admitted. ‘But lots of the kids at school call their parents by their first names. It’s quite cool, really.’
    Daniel didn’t agree, but it wasn’t the issue at that moment.
    â€˜So if she’s so cool, why don’t you like living with her?’
    â€˜She’s always going out or having friends round. She hasn’t got time for me. She never does fun stuff like you and I do.’
    â€˜But you know if you lived with me, we wouldn’t do this sort of thing all the time,’ Daniel pointed out. ‘It’s just a treat because I don’t see you very often.’
    â€˜It wouldn’t matter,’ Drew assured him earnestly. ‘I wouldn’t care.’
    Daniel sighed. ‘You would. You’d soon get bored, miles away from all your friends. But it can’t happen, anyway. I’m sorry, Drew. It just can’t.’
    Drew had sat and stared at him, his dark-lashed brown eyes slowly filling up with tears until one spilled over and ran down his cheek to drop off his chin and into his half-full mug of chocolate.
    â€˜Drew, don’t,’ Daniel pleaded, the sight of those tears a far more compelling persuasion than any spoken word could be. ‘I would if I could, I promise you, but I can’t . . .’
    Remembering the conversation now, as he accelerated on to the M5 and headed for home, he felt like a traitor. He had no worries that Amanda was neglecting the boy – for all her faults, she had always been a good mother – but to have to drop Drew off at the door with their issues unresolved felt like failing him. Daniel knew the memory of his son’s drooping posture and unhappy eyes would stay with him for the whole of the next fortnight.
    He was halfway home when his phone rang. A glance told him it was Amanda and he pulled over to answer it.
    â€˜What have you been saying to Drew?’ she demanded without preamble.
    Daniel groaned inwardly. He could do without an earful from his ex-wife.
    â€˜If this is about him wanting to come and live with me, I haven’t said anything at all to encourage him, I promise