Read Online Mother Nature: The Journals of Eleanor O'Kell by Michael Conniff - Free Book Online Page A
Authors: Michael Conniff
Tags: Science-Fiction
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did before. She says the cream has already been licked off the top. She tells me Sister Jane is keeping track of our recruits and the numbers are down for the first time since Nancy and I arrived. “It’s a new world,” Nancy says. “And it’s not pretty.”
March 15, 1967
“Congratulations,” Charles Evans says. “You are free and clear.” Sorry? I say. “The board has unanimously approved your permanent appointment to lead the Order. You are Mother Inferior no more.”
March 16, 1967
Nancy and I go to the city to celebrate and she tries hard to be happy for me. When I ask her what’s wrong she won’t tell me. “This is your day,” she says.
March 17, 1967
My day to think about Will, may he rest in peace.
April 30, 1967
“Defections,” Sister Jane says. We’ve always had them, I say. “Not like this,” Sister Jane says. “We’ve already had fifteen and it’s still April. That’s more than we usually have for the whole year.” How many did we have last year? I ask. “Twelve,” Sister Jane says. “Up from nine the year before.” What’s going on? I ask. Nancy says: “It has nothing to do with the Order. The girls don’t want to miss out on free love.” And what are we supposed to do about it? I say. “I’m praying as hard as I can,” Jane says.
May 12, 1967
Nancy and Sister Jane are in my office and all three of us are staring at the same sheet of paper. Impossible, I say. “I wish,” Nancy says. Jane says: “Recruits are way off compared to my year, Mother Superior.” Nancy says to me: “It’s not your fault, Eleanor.” You keep saying that, I say.
May 15, 1967
I give the order that no one leaves the Order without first speaking to me.
May 17, 1967
A Sister from Michigan calls. I demand that she come to the Convent before she makes any decision. “You can’t demand anything, Mother,” Michigan says. “I don’t belong to you any more.”
May 27, 1967
Defections? “More than double what we had all last year,” Nancy says. I can count, I say. How old are they? “All over the place,” Jane says. “A few, one or two, in their forties, some in their thirties, maybe half in their twenties.” Why are they leaving? I ask. “They’ve got better things to do,” Jane says. Don’t you? I ask Jane.
June 9, 1967
I call Jane and Nancy into my office. “What can we do?” Nancy says. I say I am going to the major cities to stop the bleeding. I am going to meet with Sisters who are in doubt and I am going to meet with recruits. Personally . “Isn’t it too late for that, for this year?” Nancy says. “For the recruits, I mean.” I say it’s never too late, especially not this year. “When do we leave?” Nancy says. I need you to stay here, I say. To stay on top of things.
June 12, 1967
“There is evil in the world,” Nancy says. I wonder if I have heard her right. “ Evil ,” Nancy repeats. It is night, and the only lights in our room come from the spotlight the Order keeps on the Chapel. Are we evil? I ask Nancy. “What else could we be?” she says.
June 15, 1967
“I’ll be praying for you, Mother,” Jane says. Thank you child, I say.
June 16, 1967
New Haven. Hartford. Boston. All in the next three days. I feel like a Broadway show that’s about to close out of town.
June 17, 1967
New Haven. I meet first with all the Sisters in the Order and save the recruits for later. The Sisters seem peeved at me, out of sorts, like they have come to a pep rally without any pep. I tell them the Order has never been stronger, that our building plans are right on track, that all our new hospitals will be in the black. I tell them in a world that is nothing but change the Order has to stand for something. “For what?” one of the Sisters asks. For all the good things in the world, I say, for the belief that nothing is more important than serving your fellow man and woman. A Sister asks: “What does that have to do
March 15, 1967
“Congratulations,” Charles Evans says. “You are free and clear.” Sorry? I say. “The board has unanimously approved your permanent appointment to lead the Order. You are Mother Inferior no more.”
March 16, 1967
Nancy and I go to the city to celebrate and she tries hard to be happy for me. When I ask her what’s wrong she won’t tell me. “This is your day,” she says.
March 17, 1967
My day to think about Will, may he rest in peace.
April 30, 1967
“Defections,” Sister Jane says. We’ve always had them, I say. “Not like this,” Sister Jane says. “We’ve already had fifteen and it’s still April. That’s more than we usually have for the whole year.” How many did we have last year? I ask. “Twelve,” Sister Jane says. “Up from nine the year before.” What’s going on? I ask. Nancy says: “It has nothing to do with the Order. The girls don’t want to miss out on free love.” And what are we supposed to do about it? I say. “I’m praying as hard as I can,” Jane says.
May 12, 1967
Nancy and Sister Jane are in my office and all three of us are staring at the same sheet of paper. Impossible, I say. “I wish,” Nancy says. Jane says: “Recruits are way off compared to my year, Mother Superior.” Nancy says to me: “It’s not your fault, Eleanor.” You keep saying that, I say.
May 15, 1967
I give the order that no one leaves the Order without first speaking to me.
May 17, 1967
A Sister from Michigan calls. I demand that she come to the Convent before she makes any decision. “You can’t demand anything, Mother,” Michigan says. “I don’t belong to you any more.”
May 27, 1967
Defections? “More than double what we had all last year,” Nancy says. I can count, I say. How old are they? “All over the place,” Jane says. “A few, one or two, in their forties, some in their thirties, maybe half in their twenties.” Why are they leaving? I ask. “They’ve got better things to do,” Jane says. Don’t you? I ask Jane.
June 9, 1967
I call Jane and Nancy into my office. “What can we do?” Nancy says. I say I am going to the major cities to stop the bleeding. I am going to meet with Sisters who are in doubt and I am going to meet with recruits. Personally . “Isn’t it too late for that, for this year?” Nancy says. “For the recruits, I mean.” I say it’s never too late, especially not this year. “When do we leave?” Nancy says. I need you to stay here, I say. To stay on top of things.
June 12, 1967
“There is evil in the world,” Nancy says. I wonder if I have heard her right. “ Evil ,” Nancy repeats. It is night, and the only lights in our room come from the spotlight the Order keeps on the Chapel. Are we evil? I ask Nancy. “What else could we be?” she says.
June 15, 1967
“I’ll be praying for you, Mother,” Jane says. Thank you child, I say.
June 16, 1967
New Haven. Hartford. Boston. All in the next three days. I feel like a Broadway show that’s about to close out of town.
June 17, 1967
New Haven. I meet first with all the Sisters in the Order and save the recruits for later. The Sisters seem peeved at me, out of sorts, like they have come to a pep rally without any pep. I tell them the Order has never been stronger, that our building plans are right on track, that all our new hospitals will be in the black. I tell them in a world that is nothing but change the Order has to stand for something. “For what?” one of the Sisters asks. For all the good things in the world, I say, for the belief that nothing is more important than serving your fellow man and woman. A Sister asks: “What does that have to do
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