you’d think you know something about me, right?”
“I knew you were coming to that,” Leonard said.
“Well,” I said. “I think this is really going well. What about you boys?”
Veil and Leonard may not have bonded as well as I had hoped, but they certainly had some things in common. In a way, they were both assholes. I, of course, exist on a higher plane.
“You wearing an Armani suit, must have set you back a thousand dollars—” Leonard said.
“You know a joint where I can get suits like this for a lousy one grand, I’ll stop there on my way back and pick up a couple dozen,” Veil said.
“Yeah, fine,” Leonard said. “Gold Rolex, diamond ring.… How much all that set you back?”
“It was a gift,” Veil said.
“Sure,” Leonard said. “You know what you look like?”
“What’s that?”
“You look like Central Casting for a mob movie.”
“And you look like a candidate for a chain gang. Which is kind of why I’m here.”
“You gonna defend me? How you gonna do that? I may not know exactly what you are, but I can bet the farm on this—you ain’t no Texas lawyer. Hell, you ain’t no Texan, period.”
“No problem. I can just go
pro hac vice
.”
“I hope that isn’t some kind of sexual act,” Leonard said. “Especially if it involves me and you.”
“It just means I get admitted to the bar for one case. For the specific litigation. I’ll need local counsel to handle the pleadings, of course.…”
“Do I look like a goddamned pleader to you? And you best not say yes.”
“ ‘Pleadings’ just means the papers,” Veil said, his voice a model of patience. “Motions, applications … stuff like that. You wanted to cop a plea to this, Hap wouldn’t need me. I don’t do that kind of thing. And by the way, I’m doing this for Hap, not you.”
“What is it makes you so special to Hap?” Leonard asked, studying Veil’s face carefully. “What is it that you
do
do?”
“Fight,” Veil said.
“Yeah,” I said. “He can do that.”
“Yeah, so can you and me, but that and a rubber will get us a jack off without mess.” Leonard sighed. He said to Veil, “You know what my problem is?”
“Besides attitude, sure. Says so right on the indictment. You burned down a crack house. For at least the … what was it, fourth time? That’s first-degree arson, malicious destruction of property, attempted murder—”
“I didn’t—”
“What? Know anyone was home when you firebombed the dump? Doesn’t matter—the charge is still valid.”
“Yeah, well they can valid
this
,” Leonard said, making a gesture appropriate to his speech.
“You’re looking at a flat dime down in Huntsville,” Veil told him. “That a good enough summary of your ‘problem’?”
“No, it ain’t close,” Leonard said. “Here’s my problem. You come in here wearing a few thousand bucks of fancy stuff, tell me you’re a fighter, but your face looks like you lost a lot more fights than you won. You don’t know jack about Texas law, but you’re gonna work a local jury. And that’s still not my big problem. You know what my big problem is?”
“I figure you’re going to tell me sometime before visiting hours are over,” Veil said.
“My problem is this. Why the hell should I trust you?”
“I trust him,” I said.
“I know, brother. And I trust you. What I don’t trust, on the other hand, is your judgment. The two ain’t necessarily the same thing.”
“Try this, then,” Veil told him. “Homicide. A murder. And nobody’s said a word about it. For almost twenty years.”
“You telling me you and Hap—?”
“I’m telling you there was a homicide. No statute of limitations on that, right? It’s still unsolved. And nobody’s talking.”
“I don’t know. Me and Hap been tight a long time. He’d tell me something like that. I mean, he dropped the rock on someone, I’d know.” Leonard turned to me. “Wouldn’t I?”
I didn’t say anything. Veil was
“I knew you were coming to that,” Leonard said.
“Well,” I said. “I think this is really going well. What about you boys?”
Veil and Leonard may not have bonded as well as I had hoped, but they certainly had some things in common. In a way, they were both assholes. I, of course, exist on a higher plane.
“You wearing an Armani suit, must have set you back a thousand dollars—” Leonard said.
“You know a joint where I can get suits like this for a lousy one grand, I’ll stop there on my way back and pick up a couple dozen,” Veil said.
“Yeah, fine,” Leonard said. “Gold Rolex, diamond ring.… How much all that set you back?”
“It was a gift,” Veil said.
“Sure,” Leonard said. “You know what you look like?”
“What’s that?”
“You look like Central Casting for a mob movie.”
“And you look like a candidate for a chain gang. Which is kind of why I’m here.”
“You gonna defend me? How you gonna do that? I may not know exactly what you are, but I can bet the farm on this—you ain’t no Texas lawyer. Hell, you ain’t no Texan, period.”
“No problem. I can just go
pro hac vice
.”
“I hope that isn’t some kind of sexual act,” Leonard said. “Especially if it involves me and you.”
“It just means I get admitted to the bar for one case. For the specific litigation. I’ll need local counsel to handle the pleadings, of course.…”
“Do I look like a goddamned pleader to you? And you best not say yes.”
“ ‘Pleadings’ just means the papers,” Veil said, his voice a model of patience. “Motions, applications … stuff like that. You wanted to cop a plea to this, Hap wouldn’t need me. I don’t do that kind of thing. And by the way, I’m doing this for Hap, not you.”
“What is it makes you so special to Hap?” Leonard asked, studying Veil’s face carefully. “What is it that you
do
do?”
“Fight,” Veil said.
“Yeah,” I said. “He can do that.”
“Yeah, so can you and me, but that and a rubber will get us a jack off without mess.” Leonard sighed. He said to Veil, “You know what my problem is?”
“Besides attitude, sure. Says so right on the indictment. You burned down a crack house. For at least the … what was it, fourth time? That’s first-degree arson, malicious destruction of property, attempted murder—”
“I didn’t—”
“What? Know anyone was home when you firebombed the dump? Doesn’t matter—the charge is still valid.”
“Yeah, well they can valid
this
,” Leonard said, making a gesture appropriate to his speech.
“You’re looking at a flat dime down in Huntsville,” Veil told him. “That a good enough summary of your ‘problem’?”
“No, it ain’t close,” Leonard said. “Here’s my problem. You come in here wearing a few thousand bucks of fancy stuff, tell me you’re a fighter, but your face looks like you lost a lot more fights than you won. You don’t know jack about Texas law, but you’re gonna work a local jury. And that’s still not my big problem. You know what my big problem is?”
“I figure you’re going to tell me sometime before visiting hours are over,” Veil said.
“My problem is this. Why the hell should I trust you?”
“I trust him,” I said.
“I know, brother. And I trust you. What I don’t trust, on the other hand, is your judgment. The two ain’t necessarily the same thing.”
“Try this, then,” Veil told him. “Homicide. A murder. And nobody’s said a word about it. For almost twenty years.”
“You telling me you and Hap—?”
“I’m telling you there was a homicide. No statute of limitations on that, right? It’s still unsolved. And nobody’s talking.”
“I don’t know. Me and Hap been tight a long time. He’d tell me something like that. I mean, he dropped the rock on someone, I’d know.” Leonard turned to me. “Wouldn’t I?”
I didn’t say anything. Veil was
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