lightly. He had been expecting Flo to make him suffer an awful lot longer for changing their plans.
What a relief. He could stop worrying now and just get on with planning for the arrival of Reggie the orang-utan.
*
The next day, Felix didn’t see that much of Flo as she had her music lesson at lunchtime, so she went into second lunch while Felix was out playing at the bug base on his
own. Sometimes he was lonely when Flo wasn’t there to do bug base with him, but sometimes he secretly quite liked it. Although she was his best friend, Felix thought that Mum was right when
she said Flo could be a Bit Much. Besides, being on your own when you’ve got Things to Think About, like orang-utans and how to adopt them, was no bad thing.
At the end of the day Flo ran to catch up with Felix as he made his way to the front to look out for Mum.
‘So,’ Flo said, pulling Felix round to face her and fixing him with a determined steely glare. ‘What will it eat?’
‘What will
what
eat?’ said Felix.
‘The orang-utan!’ Flo said exasperatedly. ‘I tried to ask you about it in that lesson on the Romans but you weren’t listening.’
‘Bananas, I s’pose?’ offered Felix, yawning. It had been hard to concentrate on all those Invasions the Romans had done while at the same time worrying about how Mum would
react when Reggie arrived. One of the only interesting facts about the Romans was that they had been used to having Really Wild Animals like lions around the place. It was a shame his mum was not a
Roman, Felix pondered.
‘Hmm,’ Flo was looking thoughtful. ‘But it can’t just be bananas. If you eat too many of them you get a Dire Ear, you know.’
Felix sat up. ‘A Dire Ear? What is that?’
‘It is something very bad which means you cannot go swimming or go to ballet lessons. It happened to Millie Hampton after Sophie Disbry’s birthday party where they had all these
banana-and-honey sandwiches, which Millie ate thirty-six of,’ Flo said, with great authority.
Felix burst out laughing. ‘Well, serves her right for being a great greedy whatsit! Anyway, we are not going to give the orang-utan banana-and-honey sandwiches, just bananas on their own.
And I think that they eat other vegetables too.’
‘A banana is not a vegetable,’ said Flo.
‘I never said it was,’ Felix protested.
‘You said that they eat “
other
vegetables”—’
‘Flo!’ Felix butted in. ‘It doesn’t matter, just listen – they eat vegetables and fruit – and probably peanuts as well. I can check in my book on apes anyway.
So we’d better start collecting vegetables and fruit and peanuts for when the orangutan comes to be adopted. By me,’ he added firmly. Flo was not going to take over
that
part of
the plan.
Flo stared hard into the distance for a moment and then she said, ‘The vegetables are no problem at all. Dad is already starting to grow a load of disgusting things that I will never eat,
so when they are grown I will pick them and give them to the orang-utan. What’s his name? Ronnie?’
‘Reggie. What kind of disgusting things?’ Felix added suspiciously.
‘Brussels sprouts,’ said Flo, curling her top lip disdainfully.
‘Uuuuurrrgh!’ spat Felix. ‘I’m
not
giving Reggie Brussels sprouts! They might poison him!’
Flo put her hands on her hips and said in a low, menacing kind of voice, like those baddies on the telly who are mean but also a bit cool: ‘The orang-utan will eat the Brussels sprouts,
even if we have to wrap them in banana skins to fool it into thinking they are something more tasty than what they really are.’
Felix sighed heavily. He reminded himself that things could be a lot worse, so he swallowed all his words about Flo being a bossy old boot and instead he said, ‘OK.’
Flo smiled. ‘Great. So I’ll be in charge of the Brussels sprouts then.’
Felix had a thought. ‘When do the Brussels sprouts actually sprout?’
‘What?’
‘Well, what I mean
What a relief. He could stop worrying now and just get on with planning for the arrival of Reggie the orang-utan.
*
The next day, Felix didn’t see that much of Flo as she had her music lesson at lunchtime, so she went into second lunch while Felix was out playing at the bug base on his
own. Sometimes he was lonely when Flo wasn’t there to do bug base with him, but sometimes he secretly quite liked it. Although she was his best friend, Felix thought that Mum was right when
she said Flo could be a Bit Much. Besides, being on your own when you’ve got Things to Think About, like orang-utans and how to adopt them, was no bad thing.
At the end of the day Flo ran to catch up with Felix as he made his way to the front to look out for Mum.
‘So,’ Flo said, pulling Felix round to face her and fixing him with a determined steely glare. ‘What will it eat?’
‘What will
what
eat?’ said Felix.
‘The orang-utan!’ Flo said exasperatedly. ‘I tried to ask you about it in that lesson on the Romans but you weren’t listening.’
‘Bananas, I s’pose?’ offered Felix, yawning. It had been hard to concentrate on all those Invasions the Romans had done while at the same time worrying about how Mum would
react when Reggie arrived. One of the only interesting facts about the Romans was that they had been used to having Really Wild Animals like lions around the place. It was a shame his mum was not a
Roman, Felix pondered.
‘Hmm,’ Flo was looking thoughtful. ‘But it can’t just be bananas. If you eat too many of them you get a Dire Ear, you know.’
Felix sat up. ‘A Dire Ear? What is that?’
‘It is something very bad which means you cannot go swimming or go to ballet lessons. It happened to Millie Hampton after Sophie Disbry’s birthday party where they had all these
banana-and-honey sandwiches, which Millie ate thirty-six of,’ Flo said, with great authority.
Felix burst out laughing. ‘Well, serves her right for being a great greedy whatsit! Anyway, we are not going to give the orang-utan banana-and-honey sandwiches, just bananas on their own.
And I think that they eat other vegetables too.’
‘A banana is not a vegetable,’ said Flo.
‘I never said it was,’ Felix protested.
‘You said that they eat “
other
vegetables”—’
‘Flo!’ Felix butted in. ‘It doesn’t matter, just listen – they eat vegetables and fruit – and probably peanuts as well. I can check in my book on apes anyway.
So we’d better start collecting vegetables and fruit and peanuts for when the orangutan comes to be adopted. By me,’ he added firmly. Flo was not going to take over
that
part of
the plan.
Flo stared hard into the distance for a moment and then she said, ‘The vegetables are no problem at all. Dad is already starting to grow a load of disgusting things that I will never eat,
so when they are grown I will pick them and give them to the orang-utan. What’s his name? Ronnie?’
‘Reggie. What kind of disgusting things?’ Felix added suspiciously.
‘Brussels sprouts,’ said Flo, curling her top lip disdainfully.
‘Uuuuurrrgh!’ spat Felix. ‘I’m
not
giving Reggie Brussels sprouts! They might poison him!’
Flo put her hands on her hips and said in a low, menacing kind of voice, like those baddies on the telly who are mean but also a bit cool: ‘The orang-utan will eat the Brussels sprouts,
even if we have to wrap them in banana skins to fool it into thinking they are something more tasty than what they really are.’
Felix sighed heavily. He reminded himself that things could be a lot worse, so he swallowed all his words about Flo being a bossy old boot and instead he said, ‘OK.’
Flo smiled. ‘Great. So I’ll be in charge of the Brussels sprouts then.’
Felix had a thought. ‘When do the Brussels sprouts actually sprout?’
‘What?’
‘Well, what I mean
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