Read Online Mayne Attraction: In The Spotlight by Ann Mauren - Free Book Online

they would simply appear to be a box of rocks. In their cut
and polished versions, however, they would rival the crowned jewels
of England, or so it was speculated. The true quality and value of
a gem can only be assessed after its cutting.
    So if they were depending on my romantic
conquests to see the light of display some day, well, that might be
an indefinitely long wait, similar to their formative days in the
earth’s crust. Hopefully their storage accommodations in the vault
were comfortable. It seemed most likely that sometime in the
relatively short future happy days would befall the Earth Sciences
department at OSU…and its budget.
    After my paradigm shifting conference with
Dwight Matthews Esquire, things really weren’t as different in my
life as I would have thought. But then I realized that what Grandpa
always said was true: Money doesn’t make you happy…people do.
    No one knew the difference in my prospects
but me, and Dwight, of course. And nothing was really all that
different. Discretionary funds were for people who shopped. I was
still depressed and lonely. I still missed my Grandpa. In fact, I
would trade every last penny and gem to see his smiling face just
one more time, to tell him I loved him and say a proper
goodbye.
    He always did love surprises. Too bad he
couldn’t be here to see my face for the biggest surprise in the
history of blindsides.
     
     

Chapter 8 –
Reticent

    The summer was winding to a close. It seemed
like an eternity. I reflected back on my summer break and realized
with embarrassment that I hadn’t done anything useful or profitable
the entire time. Well, on occasion I had done the laundry and the
dishes. I guess that’s useful. But this had been the year I was
going to get a summer job. Now the only experience I could detail
on my resume was that I had conducted research on the nature and
effects of psychotic and anti-social behavior.
    School would be back in session in less than
a week. I was absolutely dreading it. Though I enjoyed learning and
the classroom environment, I loathed the times in between. The
halls and the lunchroom were crowded and noisy, but still lonely,
somehow. It seemed that everyone had friends and plans…I never had
either.
    Of course, it was my own fault. The year
before my mom had brought home “How to Win Friends and Influence
People” from the library self-help section, and required that I
read it, which I dutifully did. And I did garner some useful
relationship skills there. The hardest part for me was lack of
confidence in a group dynamic. In a one-on-one situation I could
function tolerably. But if ‘people’ were listening, the reticent
side of me would invariably take over. The adrenalin would trigger
my flawed fight or flight instinct, and coward that I am, that
dysfunctional cataplexy (quiet statue) response was involuntary. My
insecurities just couldn’t handle the audience. Also, I found that,
in general, the people who made good friends weren’t sitting alone
waiting for me to make contact. They were already surrounded by
interesting, informed, intelligent companions, and had no need for
anything less, which my addition would certainly be.
    It's amazing how many people you could be
friends with if only they'd make the first approach. But nobody
ever did, so I viewed everyone from afar. I would observe my
schoolmates and form opinions and preferences, identifying the
heroes and villains while perfecting the art of peripheral vision
observation. But it was all in secret and pointless.
    It dawned on me, sort of belatedly, that
because I still didn’t have my license (something else I was going
to do this summer, but never did) that I would have to catch the
bus to school. I’d played the sympathy card the last several months
of my junior year, garnering car rides from one or the other parent
until school had let out, but I knew it was inconvenient for them,
so I considered that gravy train officially derailed. Being a
senior bus