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He never betrayed that love by treating me cruelly after we
married. I can honestly say that the few years I spent with your father were
amongst the happiest of my life.”
    “I am glad. Papa loved you as you
deserve to be loved. No one should have to suffer for one mistake.”
    “Sadly it is not only I who will suffer
if anyone ever finds out. Now you can perhaps understand why Mr. Benedict’s
reappearance in my life was not a good thing. If the truth ever came out,
Blanche might be ruined. All her hopes and dreams of being a duchess
shattered.”
    “How would anyone ever find out?”
    “I do not know, Calista. But even Lady
Bedlington knows that Harry and I were childhood sweethearts, and I am sure
others are also better at arithmetic than I was. And now you know.”
    “I would never betray you.”
    “No, I know that, dearest. That is why I
knew I could tell you. Please promise me that this has not changed the way you
feel about me.”
    “Not at all. I am only sorry that your
life was so sad until you met Papa. Does Mr. Benedict know?”
    “No!” Evelyn looked startled. “No, and
he must never know.”
    “Has he given any explanation as to why
he did not write to you? Because I have seen the way he looks at you, and he
clearly has a high regard for you.”
    “We managed to speak about it only this
morning. I made a joke of it, telling him that his letter writing skills were
not very good. He says that he wrote many times and that he was heartbroken
when he heard that I married another. The funny thing is, I believe him. I now
think that my father hid the letters, as he had found what he thought was a
better match.”
    “I really do not see why you cannot be
together,” said Calista. “If you love each other.”
    “I have been lucky enough to know
happiness twice in my life, Calista. Once with Harry when I was very young, and
once with your father. I do not deceive myself that at my age I can find such happiness
again. Perhaps now I am truly being punished for my youthful behaviour.”
    “Do not say that, Evelyn. Why only the
other day you and I were saying that we should both find happiness again. Have
you forgotten already?”
    “No, I have not forgotten, but that
certainty has been replaced by a fear of something bad happening.”
    “Lady Bedlington said much the same
thing. Now I feel it. A darkness descending over us.” So dark in fact, that for
a moment Calista thought she sensed it lurking just beyond the bedroom door,
waiting to creep in. She shook her head to eradicate the gloom. “And we are all
being silly. It has been a long, stressful day and we are all tired. Tomorrow
will bring a better day and happier feelings. I know it.”
    “I hope so.” Evelyn smiled sadly.
    Calista went to her own room and started
to undress. She had told the maid to go to bed, feeling guilty about keeping
the poor girl up so late. For the first time since she had met her step-sister,
she started thinking of her as ‘poor Blanche’. No child should have to live
with the stigma of being illegitimate, especially in such a hypocritical
society. Calista knew of girls from their town who had to go away, returning
many months later looking older and sadder. Some had been sent away from their
parents’ homes permanently.
    A few months earlier, she admitted to
herself, she might have been shocked at Evelyn’s youthful behaviour, although
she hoped she would always be sympathetic. Now, because she loved the colonel,
she understood how Evelyn must have felt about Mr. Benedict. The colonel only
had to touch her hand, and through her glove at that, for her to long for his
touch to linger and to turn into something more passionate. At night she had
fevered dreams about him, from which she awoke excited, but also blushing
furiously.
     She could easily understand how
such feelings and emotions could overwhelm a woman so that she forgot to behave
properly and just gave into the desire. Evelyn and Mr. Benedict should have
been