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Authors: N. J. Walters
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Baltimore, had asked at one time or another. Ryan was the only man she’d ever met who threatened all her defenses and good intentions.
“You can,” he countered. He wasn’t touching her, but she could feel his eyes on her like a physical caress. His determination beat at her like a living thing. She could sense him willing her to accept his invitation. She almost caved. But thoughts of her dreams, of her mother’s misery stopped her.
“Don’t…don’t ask me again. Please.” She couldn’t bring herself to look at him, staring at the plain beige wall in front of her instead. “I’ll complain to Abe if you do.”
He stiffened beside her. She couldn’t believe she’d threatened to do such a thing. Ryan loved his job. He was an excellent firefighter. She knew she’d never do anything to jeopardize that, no matter what she’d said. But he couldn’t know that.
Surprisingly, it wasn’t anger she felt emanating from him, but sadness. “If that’s what you want.” He cupped her jaw with his hand and tilted her face upward until she was forced to look at him.
He looked so sad she almost relented, but couldn’t. Fear held her back from reaching out. “It’s what I have to do.”
He nodded again, slowly, as if he understood her reasons. His golden-brown eyes were filled with a longing that almost broke her heart. “I’ll wait.” They were two simple words, but filled with such finality. “If you change your mind, you can ask me.”
“I won’t change my mind,” she whispered. She couldn’t. Still, it took all of her willpower not to melt against his touch and beg him to kiss her again. What was wrong with her?
He traced his thumb over her bottom lip before releasing her. “I think you will.” Turning, he strode away and never looked back. She knew because she couldn’t tear her gaze away from him.
Ryan’s hands were fisted at his sides as he left the room. Frustration twisted his guts into knots and despair picked at his soul. One of the hardest things he’d ever done in his life was to walk away from Esther. He knew she had her reasons, but understanding that still didn’t make it any easier when she pulled away from him at every turn.
He could still taste her on his lips and tongue, an elusive, yet addictive spicy flavor of woman and peppermint. His erection jerked and he groaned. Adjusting himself as best he could, he stalked out of building and headed across the street to the fire station. He needed some time alone to get himself back under control.
Thankfully the rest of the guys were busy when he went inside, and he made his way upstairs to sit on the side of his bunk. Closing his eyes, he could still smell Esther’s unique scent, a combination of floral soap and musky female.
She might deny him, but she’d been just as aroused as he was. Her nipples had stood out in sharp relief against the fabric of the formfitting white blouse she wore. God, he’d wanted to touch her so badly, to trace his finger over the hardened nubs, but he wouldn’t do that. Not at work. It was bad enough he’d kissed her. He was lucky she wasn’t screaming harassment.
Taking a deep breath, he tried to calm his scattered emotions and thoughts. When she’d mentioned she hadn’t been sleeping well, he thought he might have finally found his opening. Maybe this time she’d talk to him.
But it hadn’t happened. She’d tried to close herself off from him even more and that had pissed him off and disappointed him. God, he was going crazy. How do you tell a woman you dream of her, had dreamed of her almost your entire life?
Ryan buried his face in his hands, his entire body tense. From the time he was sixteen, he’d started dreaming of her—pleasant memories of life in a Scottish village many centuries ago. They were both much younger then, little more than children really, and the dreams had been simple. They’d tended to their daily chores and spent hours roaming the countryside together. As
“You can,” he countered. He wasn’t touching her, but she could feel his eyes on her like a physical caress. His determination beat at her like a living thing. She could sense him willing her to accept his invitation. She almost caved. But thoughts of her dreams, of her mother’s misery stopped her.
“Don’t…don’t ask me again. Please.” She couldn’t bring herself to look at him, staring at the plain beige wall in front of her instead. “I’ll complain to Abe if you do.”
He stiffened beside her. She couldn’t believe she’d threatened to do such a thing. Ryan loved his job. He was an excellent firefighter. She knew she’d never do anything to jeopardize that, no matter what she’d said. But he couldn’t know that.
Surprisingly, it wasn’t anger she felt emanating from him, but sadness. “If that’s what you want.” He cupped her jaw with his hand and tilted her face upward until she was forced to look at him.
He looked so sad she almost relented, but couldn’t. Fear held her back from reaching out. “It’s what I have to do.”
He nodded again, slowly, as if he understood her reasons. His golden-brown eyes were filled with a longing that almost broke her heart. “I’ll wait.” They were two simple words, but filled with such finality. “If you change your mind, you can ask me.”
“I won’t change my mind,” she whispered. She couldn’t. Still, it took all of her willpower not to melt against his touch and beg him to kiss her again. What was wrong with her?
He traced his thumb over her bottom lip before releasing her. “I think you will.” Turning, he strode away and never looked back. She knew because she couldn’t tear her gaze away from him.
Ryan’s hands were fisted at his sides as he left the room. Frustration twisted his guts into knots and despair picked at his soul. One of the hardest things he’d ever done in his life was to walk away from Esther. He knew she had her reasons, but understanding that still didn’t make it any easier when she pulled away from him at every turn.
He could still taste her on his lips and tongue, an elusive, yet addictive spicy flavor of woman and peppermint. His erection jerked and he groaned. Adjusting himself as best he could, he stalked out of building and headed across the street to the fire station. He needed some time alone to get himself back under control.
Thankfully the rest of the guys were busy when he went inside, and he made his way upstairs to sit on the side of his bunk. Closing his eyes, he could still smell Esther’s unique scent, a combination of floral soap and musky female.
She might deny him, but she’d been just as aroused as he was. Her nipples had stood out in sharp relief against the fabric of the formfitting white blouse she wore. God, he’d wanted to touch her so badly, to trace his finger over the hardened nubs, but he wouldn’t do that. Not at work. It was bad enough he’d kissed her. He was lucky she wasn’t screaming harassment.
Taking a deep breath, he tried to calm his scattered emotions and thoughts. When she’d mentioned she hadn’t been sleeping well, he thought he might have finally found his opening. Maybe this time she’d talk to him.
But it hadn’t happened. She’d tried to close herself off from him even more and that had pissed him off and disappointed him. God, he was going crazy. How do you tell a woman you dream of her, had dreamed of her almost your entire life?
Ryan buried his face in his hands, his entire body tense. From the time he was sixteen, he’d started dreaming of her—pleasant memories of life in a Scottish village many centuries ago. They were both much younger then, little more than children really, and the dreams had been simple. They’d tended to their daily chores and spent hours roaming the countryside together. As
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