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demanded.
    â€˜Sir,’ I began, pushing past him before he knew what I was about, ‘we come on an urgent mission, which much concerns your future happiness.’
    By this time, Sophia had also edged her way past him. We now stood in the centre of the small room, while he leaned against the door, which had closed behind us.
    â€˜What nonsense are you talking?’
    I had taken the liberty of rehearsing a speech while we made our way to his domicile, and now, placing my hand over my heart, I opened my lips and intoned: ‘Oh, happy lover of the young and beautiful Janetta.’
    â€˜Who the hell is Janetta?’
    By this time, M’Kenrie’s roommate had roused himself from his semi-comatose condition and added his mite to our little scene.
    â€˜Don’t be daft, lad,’ he chided his friend. ‘You must remember the daughter of old MacDonald?’
    â€˜From the farm?’ M’Kenrie asked, still quite befuddled.
    â€˜From MacDonald Hall, you great loon!’
    M’Kenrie perked up at this, and seemed much more sobre himself.
    â€˜D’you mean the young heiress?’ he asked.
    â€˜The same,’ I answered at once.
    â€˜But I hardly know the girl!’ he protested.
    â€˜According to these two,’ his friend said, ‘you’re her lover!’
    I immediately spied my opportunity to continue my speech.
    â€˜You who possess Janetta’s heart,’ I cried, dabbing at my eyes with a moist handkerchief for full effect, ‘why do you delay so cruelly the confession of your attachment, when her hand is destined to another?’
    â€˜Delay what?’ He seemed more at sea than ever.
    â€˜The confession of your attachment,’ Sophia instructed him. ‘Keep up, sir, for Heaven’s sake!’
    â€˜A few short weeks will put an end to every hope you entertain, by uniting this unfortunate victim of her father’s cruelty to the detestable Graham!’ At this, I hissed dramatically, which startled both men. ‘I beg you to reveal your dark desire and persuade her into a secret union which will secure the happiness of you both.’
    â€˜There you have it!’ the friend declared at the conclusion of my speech. ‘She’s all a-twitter over you, if what they’re saying is true.’
    â€˜I can hardly believe it.’
    â€˜What are you going to do about it?’ Sophia asked, growing impatient.
    â€˜I’m going to MacDonald Hall as fast as I can,’ he replied without hesitation. ‘I’m not such a fool as to let a real, live heiress slip through my fingers!’
    He paused only long enough to shave and wash, and prepared to adorn himself in his dress uniform, which we considered would be most effective. We informed him that we would return to MacDonald Hall ahead of him and have Janetta ready to meet him when he arrived.
    We made sure that Janetta’s father was off hunting before we brought her down, quite unsuspecting, to continue our previously arranged time of reading. I had a volume of Clarissa Harlowe before me, while Sophia perused a worn copy of The Monk and Janetta struggled to make sense of The Sorrows of Young Werther .
    Suddenly M’Kenrie burst into the room. He was quite a spectacle, as even I was forced to admit: wet from head to toe, his white linen shirt clinging to his manly form like a second skin while he held his scarlet coat in his left hand.
    â€˜Captain M’Kenrie!’ Janetta cried, in shocked disbelief. ‘What are you doing here? And why are you all wet?’
    â€˜Clearly he has been swimming in the loch, in order to cool his overwhelming passion for you!’ Sophia cried, quite enraptured.
    â€˜Actually,’ MacDonald said apologetically, ‘I slipped and fell into a horse trough.’
    There was an awkward silence, while I frantically made signs to M’Kenrie behind Janetta’s back. He seemed at length to grasp my meaning, and strode