Leaving Normal

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Authors: Stef Ann Holm
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the holidays. But in many ways, he knew that wasn't necessarily the truth. The rift in their differences had been widening, slowly and steadily. Now there were obviously signs of strain.
    Two days ago, he'd been helping Rocky tune up his snowmobile and he'd had to drive back home for a minute to get a tool they needed for the gears. He went into the house to say hi to Kim, and his unexpected re-turn had sent her into the laundry room where the hum of the dryer muted the last remnants of her phone conversation. When Tony had asked her who she was talking to, she'd flushed quickly and said Laurie.
    Laurie was Kim's best friend, someone she'd been spending a great deal more time with—both in her company and talking on the cell phone.
    In the pit of his gut Tony knew something was off, but it was just too much to deal with at Christmas. The thought of spending it alone, in discord with his wife, wasn't an option he wanted to get into. Besides, he'd rather keep things neutral because Parker was really looking forward to Christmas and this was no time to rock the boat.
    But he had been expecting Kim and Parker to show tonight.
    Tony went into the captain's office for some quiet to call the house, but there was no answer.
    Sitting in the desk chair, he stared out the window, seeing first only darkness, then his reflection. His eyebrows were knit together, his mouth a taut line. He laid his palms on his thighs, ran them over his pants to his knees and leaned forward.
    "Hey, Cruz, where's the wife?" Captain Palladino walked past the open doorway, pausing briefly, his arms filled with toys.
    "She must have got hung up doing something. I'm sure she'll be here soon."
    "My wife wants to talk to her about a Web site design. Is Kim still doing that?"
    "Yeah, she is."
    After Captain Palladino was nudged down the hallway by Walcroft's twin boys, Tony called Kim's cell phone. It took numerous tries and forty minutes later for her to pick up.
    "Hullo?"
    "Kim, where are you?" Swallowing tightly, Tony tried to curb the resentment in his tone.
    "I'm so sorry, baby." Her voice was level, even. "Parker and I went to Laurie's house and I had too much wine. I fell asleep. I'm on my way home now. Parker's sleeping in the car. We're just too tired to come to the station."
    Deep down, Tony knew that Kim was just as unhappy with their relationship as he was. He'd barely known her four months when they got married. Several months later, he acknowledged to himself that they'd probably made a mistake. But for Parker and the stability the little girl finally had, Tony stayed and hoped he was wrong about everything.
    Tonight's phone call with Kim only added to his suspicions that she was lying to him about where she'd been. More important, with whom. He didn't have any proof she was being unfaithful, just a feeling that held him in its grip long after he disconnected the call.
    The next morning, Kim wasn't home when he got off shift. He went into the house, the thermostat tripping on the furnace as he closed the door, leaving the cold air in the garage. The tree lights were still on; he felt the bulbs and they were warm to the touch. They'd been on all night. He'd told Kim to unplug them before going to bed. Even the new safety ones could be a fire hazzard on a fresh cut tree. Dirty dishes and cups were stacked in the sink. A pile of mail lay unopened by the phone, including a number of holiday cards with red and green envelopes.
    Merry Fucking Christmas.
    Scratching the back of his neck, Tony stood in the kitchen and tried to figure out what he was going to do.
    He'd just started cleaning up the dishes when Kim pulled into the driveway.
    Parker burst into the house, ran to him and squeezed his legs. "Hi, Tony! Can I open my presents now? I've been waiting and waiting."
    He didn't ask her where she'd been waiting; he laid his hand on top of her head, smoothing her hair.
    Kim came trailing in, a poinsettia in her grasp. "I think we got the last one in town."

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