Read Online Lead Me Not by A. Meredith Walters - Free Book Online
Authors: A. Meredith Walters
Ads: Link
giving me a wink.
“Well, it’s good to know you’re taking it seriously,” I remarked, watching him as he took another drag from his cigarette before dropping it on the ground and stomping it out.
Maxx shrugged. “It’s just I can think of a lot of other things I’d rather be doing,” he said.
Was I supposed to find a hidden meaning in his seemingly innocent statement? And why was I second-guessing every nuance in our conversation? It wasn’t like me to be so unsure.
“Really,” I muttered dryly.
Maxx chuckled and then sobered, his eyes heated and smoldering.
“Definitely,” he said quietly, raising an eyebrow, a smirk dancing across his lips.
He looked at me in a way that was both warm and intense, the kind of look that stripped you to the bone and left you shivering.
His eyes were piercing in their directness, and I knew he wasn’t fooled by my attempts at sarcasm and nonchalance. My uncomfortable attraction to him, which had begun only a few days before, practically oozed from my pores. It was mortifying.
And I knew I needed to shut this down—for both our sakes. Itwasn’t appropriate. And he was making me feel . . . disconcerted.
“Well, I think the group is going to be really helpful. I’m sure you’ll get a lot out of it,” I said lamely, hoping he got the point. It seemed extremely important to remind us both of who I was and what my role was in his life. I needed to reinforce where I belonged. I was a counselor in training, someone whose role was to guide him on a difficult journey.
Nothing more.
Maxx gave me a look that was hard to decipher. “I hope you’re right,” he said, running a dirty hand across his face, leaving a smudge along the bridge of his nose.
I had to clench my hand into a fist in order to resist the urge to wipe the smudge away. And I knew there was more than my OCD at work here.
His words unsettled me. Was I perceiving a subtext that wasn’t there? Or was he purposefully communicating something that I had yet to figure out?
My guess was the latter.
He suddenly dropped his eyes, and I was surprised by the vulnerability that danced across his face.
“I really hope you’re right,” he said softly, and I didn’t know whether the comment was for him or for me.
I tilted my head at him, looking at him closely. He seemed lost in thought, and I wondered what had him so consumed.
I couldn’t help but be curious about him. He made it impossible not to be. He was obviously a complicated man with a complicated past. I was simultaneously intrigued and annoyed that I was intrigued.
There was a definite line I shouldn’t cross. So why after meeting this man once was that boundary so hard for me to remember?
Maxx frowned and opened his mouth, then closed it again.Then he looked at me, and I watched as his face smoothed over and any sign of openness was lost.
“At least I’ll like the view.” His gaze purposefully raked up and down my body as he raised his eyebrows mockingly. His smile, while trying to be seductive, was hard and brittle. Any softening I had felt was trampled by the overwhelming urge to scream in his face.
His need to fuel my unease seemed forced. As though he were firmly putting us back on ground he was more comfortable with.
“That’s not really appropriate,” I managed, annoyed by how let down I felt. Because I already missed the elusive, unguarded Maxx that I had glimpsed only seconds ago.
Because that Maxx seemed real.
This Maxx was something else entirely.
But who really knew which persona was authentic?
Hell, maybe neither was, and the real Maxx was someone I hadn’t met yet.
But one thing was for sure: I couldn’t allow myself to want to get involved with any side of him. He was in a group I was helping to facilitate. Any relationship we had would need to be strictly professional. I was required to uphold a code of conduct that was as essential as it was required. There wasn’t room for gray areas. There was only black and
“Well, it’s good to know you’re taking it seriously,” I remarked, watching him as he took another drag from his cigarette before dropping it on the ground and stomping it out.
Maxx shrugged. “It’s just I can think of a lot of other things I’d rather be doing,” he said.
Was I supposed to find a hidden meaning in his seemingly innocent statement? And why was I second-guessing every nuance in our conversation? It wasn’t like me to be so unsure.
“Really,” I muttered dryly.
Maxx chuckled and then sobered, his eyes heated and smoldering.
“Definitely,” he said quietly, raising an eyebrow, a smirk dancing across his lips.
He looked at me in a way that was both warm and intense, the kind of look that stripped you to the bone and left you shivering.
His eyes were piercing in their directness, and I knew he wasn’t fooled by my attempts at sarcasm and nonchalance. My uncomfortable attraction to him, which had begun only a few days before, practically oozed from my pores. It was mortifying.
And I knew I needed to shut this down—for both our sakes. Itwasn’t appropriate. And he was making me feel . . . disconcerted.
“Well, I think the group is going to be really helpful. I’m sure you’ll get a lot out of it,” I said lamely, hoping he got the point. It seemed extremely important to remind us both of who I was and what my role was in his life. I needed to reinforce where I belonged. I was a counselor in training, someone whose role was to guide him on a difficult journey.
Nothing more.
Maxx gave me a look that was hard to decipher. “I hope you’re right,” he said, running a dirty hand across his face, leaving a smudge along the bridge of his nose.
I had to clench my hand into a fist in order to resist the urge to wipe the smudge away. And I knew there was more than my OCD at work here.
His words unsettled me. Was I perceiving a subtext that wasn’t there? Or was he purposefully communicating something that I had yet to figure out?
My guess was the latter.
He suddenly dropped his eyes, and I was surprised by the vulnerability that danced across his face.
“I really hope you’re right,” he said softly, and I didn’t know whether the comment was for him or for me.
I tilted my head at him, looking at him closely. He seemed lost in thought, and I wondered what had him so consumed.
I couldn’t help but be curious about him. He made it impossible not to be. He was obviously a complicated man with a complicated past. I was simultaneously intrigued and annoyed that I was intrigued.
There was a definite line I shouldn’t cross. So why after meeting this man once was that boundary so hard for me to remember?
Maxx frowned and opened his mouth, then closed it again.Then he looked at me, and I watched as his face smoothed over and any sign of openness was lost.
“At least I’ll like the view.” His gaze purposefully raked up and down my body as he raised his eyebrows mockingly. His smile, while trying to be seductive, was hard and brittle. Any softening I had felt was trampled by the overwhelming urge to scream in his face.
His need to fuel my unease seemed forced. As though he were firmly putting us back on ground he was more comfortable with.
“That’s not really appropriate,” I managed, annoyed by how let down I felt. Because I already missed the elusive, unguarded Maxx that I had glimpsed only seconds ago.
Because that Maxx seemed real.
This Maxx was something else entirely.
But who really knew which persona was authentic?
Hell, maybe neither was, and the real Maxx was someone I hadn’t met yet.
But one thing was for sure: I couldn’t allow myself to want to get involved with any side of him. He was in a group I was helping to facilitate. Any relationship we had would need to be strictly professional. I was required to uphold a code of conduct that was as essential as it was required. There wasn’t room for gray areas. There was only black and
Similar Books
