Read Online Last Christmas (Bound Together) by Marie Coulson - Free Book Online
Authors: Marie Coulson
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taking drugs.
“You already know about the drugs and how Andre introduced me into that lifestyle. I was at rock bottom Ollie. I hated your father and every day I wanted to kill myself just to get away from it all; from him. Andre offered me a way out and I took it. It was awfully selfish and not a day goes by that I don’t regret leaving you there but I was bad for you too. We weren’t perfect.”
I snorted. “Understatement of the fucking year.”
She sighed loudly. “We didn’t know any better.”
I was getting impatient. Her stupid sob story was not making me feel either bad for her or upset that my father was dying. “Was there a point to your little story?”
She hung her head and continued. “I went to see him at the pen. He looked awful Ollie. He was pale, thin; he looked nothing like the man I had left behind all those years ago. He was so frail and when he talked he could hardly stop the tears. He was sorry Ollie. He told me what he did to you and how he treated you and it was killing him.”
“No, the cancer is killing him. What he did to me, he was feeling guilty about because he knows he is finally about to get the ultimate trial. He’s gonna have to answer to God for all the shit he did to me. He wasn’t upset over me; he’s scared of what comes when he croaks.”
I went to get up but she caught my hand. “Please Oliver. Let me finish.”
With an irritated and angry expression on my face, I sat back down. “He asked me to take care of you. I told him you would never want to see me again but he said I was wrong. He said you’re a good man, better than him in every way and that you would somehow find a way to forgive me. And he was right. Here you are, here we are. Our little family. You have one thing to thank him for Oliver.”
“And what the hell would that be?”
She held my hand tighter in hers as tears slid down her face. “He made you who you are today. You’re strong because he made you have to fight and defend yourself. You’re smart because you wanted to get away from that life so bad that you studied hard and became a better man. And you’re heart, Oliver. You have a good heart, a kind and loving heart. I’ve seen the way you are with Patrick. You’re that way because of what we did to you. We screwed it all up and you were so determined not to be like him, that you became a better man than he could ever be. In a sick and twisted way, you have him to thank for that.”
She had to be kidding right? Thank him! After the hell I went through as a kid. No, fucking, way!
“Thank him? You think I should thank him for those things? I blame him and you for those things. I’m strong, because I had to defend myself against a man four times my strength and size. I had to be strong to get through every single day in that hell. I had to be strong just so I could walk back into my home every damn day and fight to survive. I’m smart because I wanted to be better than you and him. I’m smart because I worked damn hard and never stopped trying. Something you know nothing about. And as for my heart, my heart and my ability to forgive what you did had nothing to do with you.”
“ I didn’t have a heart before last year. I fucked every girl that threw herself at me and I didn’t care if I ever saw them again. I didn’t care about anyone. I can love and give my heart, because Layla showed me I had one. She is the reason I was able to meet you. I was in a good place. I was in love. Don’t try and take credit or give him credit for anything I am or anything I’ve done. You don’t deserve it. And for the record, Patrick, is the reason I decided to be a family. No other. I won’t let anyone or anything screw up his life the way mine was. He will always be able to count on me.”
She stared at me, tears streaming down her face, with an expression of horror.
“Are we done here?”
She nodded weakly.
“Good.”
I got up and headed for the front door, rolling my eyes as she
“You already know about the drugs and how Andre introduced me into that lifestyle. I was at rock bottom Ollie. I hated your father and every day I wanted to kill myself just to get away from it all; from him. Andre offered me a way out and I took it. It was awfully selfish and not a day goes by that I don’t regret leaving you there but I was bad for you too. We weren’t perfect.”
I snorted. “Understatement of the fucking year.”
She sighed loudly. “We didn’t know any better.”
I was getting impatient. Her stupid sob story was not making me feel either bad for her or upset that my father was dying. “Was there a point to your little story?”
She hung her head and continued. “I went to see him at the pen. He looked awful Ollie. He was pale, thin; he looked nothing like the man I had left behind all those years ago. He was so frail and when he talked he could hardly stop the tears. He was sorry Ollie. He told me what he did to you and how he treated you and it was killing him.”
“No, the cancer is killing him. What he did to me, he was feeling guilty about because he knows he is finally about to get the ultimate trial. He’s gonna have to answer to God for all the shit he did to me. He wasn’t upset over me; he’s scared of what comes when he croaks.”
I went to get up but she caught my hand. “Please Oliver. Let me finish.”
With an irritated and angry expression on my face, I sat back down. “He asked me to take care of you. I told him you would never want to see me again but he said I was wrong. He said you’re a good man, better than him in every way and that you would somehow find a way to forgive me. And he was right. Here you are, here we are. Our little family. You have one thing to thank him for Oliver.”
“And what the hell would that be?”
She held my hand tighter in hers as tears slid down her face. “He made you who you are today. You’re strong because he made you have to fight and defend yourself. You’re smart because you wanted to get away from that life so bad that you studied hard and became a better man. And you’re heart, Oliver. You have a good heart, a kind and loving heart. I’ve seen the way you are with Patrick. You’re that way because of what we did to you. We screwed it all up and you were so determined not to be like him, that you became a better man than he could ever be. In a sick and twisted way, you have him to thank for that.”
She had to be kidding right? Thank him! After the hell I went through as a kid. No, fucking, way!
“Thank him? You think I should thank him for those things? I blame him and you for those things. I’m strong, because I had to defend myself against a man four times my strength and size. I had to be strong to get through every single day in that hell. I had to be strong just so I could walk back into my home every damn day and fight to survive. I’m smart because I wanted to be better than you and him. I’m smart because I worked damn hard and never stopped trying. Something you know nothing about. And as for my heart, my heart and my ability to forgive what you did had nothing to do with you.”
“ I didn’t have a heart before last year. I fucked every girl that threw herself at me and I didn’t care if I ever saw them again. I didn’t care about anyone. I can love and give my heart, because Layla showed me I had one. She is the reason I was able to meet you. I was in a good place. I was in love. Don’t try and take credit or give him credit for anything I am or anything I’ve done. You don’t deserve it. And for the record, Patrick, is the reason I decided to be a family. No other. I won’t let anyone or anything screw up his life the way mine was. He will always be able to count on me.”
She stared at me, tears streaming down her face, with an expression of horror.
“Are we done here?”
She nodded weakly.
“Good.”
I got up and headed for the front door, rolling my eyes as she
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