Read Online Kiss Me That Way: A Cottonbloom Novel by Laura Trentham - Free Book Online
Authors: Laura Trentham
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for the joy of watching him.
Finally, his laughter subsided, but not his smile. “In a way, Cottonbloom is refreshing. No apologies or hiding its jacked-up social hierarchy and bigotries. They are clearly marked and on display.” The slight disdain in his voice galvanized her pride.
“We have our faults, but this is a good town.” She poked him in the shoulder. “Both sides of the river. And while the rest of the country has drifted further apart with wealth inequality, Cottonbloom has actually closed the gap.”
“You sound like you like it here.”
His green eyes probed. His experience with the town had been tainted with grief and responsibility.
“I wouldn’t have come back here after college if I didn’t.” She dropped her gaze to the speckled linoleum floor. The truth was more complicated and nothing she wished to discuss.
“How’s your mama?” he asked as if reading her mind. His soft voice attempted to strip away the years, but she’d spent most of her life covering for her mother.
“She’s fine.” It wasn’t a lie. At the moment, she was sober and even holding down a job. “Come on; we have a few more stretches to get to before we run out of time.”
They finished up in relative silence except for the heavy breathing involved. As he gathered his things, he said, “For the record, I don’t do all that thrill-seeking stuff to prove something to this place.”
“It’s for the adrenaline rush, then? I’ve heard it can be addictive.” She made a note in his file.
He stepped in front of her, and she looked up, clutching the file to her chest. His warmth drew her closer, her body swaying. His light touch on her arm froze her. Goose bumps rose. She waited, sensing that any prodding from her would silence him. His long, slow breath made her understand how difficult this was for him.
Like that night so long ago, she slipped her hand into his. Even though she’d touched him throughout their session, positioning his body and stretching his limbs, the contact of their hands was more intimate, more important, casting back to long-ago promises.
“Part of why I took risks was the exhilaration of experiencing freedom. But I think a bigger part was trying to eradicate fear.”
“I remember.” Every word of their conversations had been carved into memories.
He tensed. “What do you remember?”
“What you were most afraid of.”
He pulled his bottom lip between his teeth, broke eye contact, and gave a shake of his head. She wanted to cup his cheek and force him to look at her. Instead, she squeezed his hand.
He was quiet for a long moment, and she worried she’d overstepped. Finally, he spoke, his voice scratchy. “Every night I lay awake and schemed to keep my family together. The state would have put them somewhere I couldn’t protect them.”
“Cade.” She breathed his name on a sigh, drawing his gaze to hers.
Even after the years, the success all three siblings had achieved, a torturous fear reflected on his face. That’s what he’d tried to leave behind on the rock face, in the sky, on a mountain, but he couldn’t. It would be like ripping off a piece of his soul.
Hadn’t she done the same in her own way? Black belts in jujitsu and karate, constant training to stamp out her own fears. Had it worked? She trusted her abilities to defend herself, but in her nightmares she was powerless against the creeping terror and doubts.
“You can’t cut those sorts of memories out of your head. If you did, you wouldn’t be … you.” Her words echoed with a hollowness off the sterile floor and walls.
“Some people might say that’s a good thing.” His voice had hardened and the vulnerability and affinity between them vanished. He extricated his hand and opened the door. “I get time off for good behavior, right?”
“You need to continue to stretch and work your leg and hand even on your off days.”
He nodded and walked out, his gait looser and his limp less noticeable. His
Finally, his laughter subsided, but not his smile. “In a way, Cottonbloom is refreshing. No apologies or hiding its jacked-up social hierarchy and bigotries. They are clearly marked and on display.” The slight disdain in his voice galvanized her pride.
“We have our faults, but this is a good town.” She poked him in the shoulder. “Both sides of the river. And while the rest of the country has drifted further apart with wealth inequality, Cottonbloom has actually closed the gap.”
“You sound like you like it here.”
His green eyes probed. His experience with the town had been tainted with grief and responsibility.
“I wouldn’t have come back here after college if I didn’t.” She dropped her gaze to the speckled linoleum floor. The truth was more complicated and nothing she wished to discuss.
“How’s your mama?” he asked as if reading her mind. His soft voice attempted to strip away the years, but she’d spent most of her life covering for her mother.
“She’s fine.” It wasn’t a lie. At the moment, she was sober and even holding down a job. “Come on; we have a few more stretches to get to before we run out of time.”
They finished up in relative silence except for the heavy breathing involved. As he gathered his things, he said, “For the record, I don’t do all that thrill-seeking stuff to prove something to this place.”
“It’s for the adrenaline rush, then? I’ve heard it can be addictive.” She made a note in his file.
He stepped in front of her, and she looked up, clutching the file to her chest. His warmth drew her closer, her body swaying. His light touch on her arm froze her. Goose bumps rose. She waited, sensing that any prodding from her would silence him. His long, slow breath made her understand how difficult this was for him.
Like that night so long ago, she slipped her hand into his. Even though she’d touched him throughout their session, positioning his body and stretching his limbs, the contact of their hands was more intimate, more important, casting back to long-ago promises.
“Part of why I took risks was the exhilaration of experiencing freedom. But I think a bigger part was trying to eradicate fear.”
“I remember.” Every word of their conversations had been carved into memories.
He tensed. “What do you remember?”
“What you were most afraid of.”
He pulled his bottom lip between his teeth, broke eye contact, and gave a shake of his head. She wanted to cup his cheek and force him to look at her. Instead, she squeezed his hand.
He was quiet for a long moment, and she worried she’d overstepped. Finally, he spoke, his voice scratchy. “Every night I lay awake and schemed to keep my family together. The state would have put them somewhere I couldn’t protect them.”
“Cade.” She breathed his name on a sigh, drawing his gaze to hers.
Even after the years, the success all three siblings had achieved, a torturous fear reflected on his face. That’s what he’d tried to leave behind on the rock face, in the sky, on a mountain, but he couldn’t. It would be like ripping off a piece of his soul.
Hadn’t she done the same in her own way? Black belts in jujitsu and karate, constant training to stamp out her own fears. Had it worked? She trusted her abilities to defend herself, but in her nightmares she was powerless against the creeping terror and doubts.
“You can’t cut those sorts of memories out of your head. If you did, you wouldn’t be … you.” Her words echoed with a hollowness off the sterile floor and walls.
“Some people might say that’s a good thing.” His voice had hardened and the vulnerability and affinity between them vanished. He extricated his hand and opened the door. “I get time off for good behavior, right?”
“You need to continue to stretch and work your leg and hand even on your off days.”
He nodded and walked out, his gait looser and his limp less noticeable. His
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