She hit the worldâs worst boss with the WORLDâS BEST BOSS coffee mug. She hit her once, and felt the fragile bones on the side of Vickiâs skull crack. Vicki stared at her in dazed surprise, as if her stapler had learned to talk. Her lip curled into a nasty sneer, but she didnât get a chance to speak. Minfreda hit her again. And again and again. Minfreda kept hitting her until the heavy mug broke and the side of Vickiâs head was soft and squishy.
Blood spattered Vickiâs blonde hair and ran down her cheek. There was an ugly abrasion over her ear. But Minfreda had mostly battered the white bones beneath the pink skin. Vicki was deader than last yearâs vacation schedule. She sat in her executiveâs chair with a deathâs-head grin on her face.
The old mousy Minnie would have panicked when she saw her battered boss. The new Minfreda kept her cool blonde head. She calmly considered what she needed to do.
Vickiâs blood was dripping on her suit and heading for the floor. Minfreda whipped off her neck scarf and wrapped it around the dead blondeâs head. Better, but blood was seeping through it already. Minfreda looked around for something else and saw my typewriter cover. I was the only person in the department who used one. The others didnât care about their machines. The cover was gray plastic. She bundled it around Vickiâs dripping head.
She had to get rid of the body. Vicki was not tall or heavy, but she was a deadweight, no pun intended. Minfreda was strong, but she couldnât move the body without help. She went back to the construction area.
The old sun-faded curtains from the corner office were still in a heap in the back hall. She also saw a lumber cart, like the ones you get at Home Depot nowadays for hauling large purchases.
Minfreda bundled the curtains onto the cart and trundled them back to Vickiâs office. She spread the curtains out on the lumber cart, then tipped Vickiâs chair forward. The exterminated executive landed in the dusty drapes with a deadweight thud.
âItâs curtains for you, boss,â Minfreda said out loud, and tried to suppress a giggle.
The cart was harder to maneuver with the body on it. Minfreda had to shove Vickiâs desk aside to get the cart through the door. The dead blondeâs foot caught in the door frame, and her pink heel was pried off. Minfreda tossed it on top of the body, then cleared a path through the department, carefully moving waste cans and steering around desks until she got to a clear aisle.
Minfreda was sweating like a construction worker. The cart was heavy and awkward. She was worried someone would come back to the office. She kept her ears open for the
ding!
of the elevator doors. But Minfreda was no mouse. Her fear didnât paralyze her. It made her think more clearly.
Once in the dingy back hall, Minfreda pulled the cart near the old torn-up carpet and spread the rug out flat. Then she tugged on the curtains until the body slid off the cart and onto the carpet. She heard the rotted, sun-faded fabric rip, but not before sheâd moved Vicki.
Minfreda had a sneezing fit from the dust, but she rolled up the carpet with Vicki inside. A Vicki taco, if you will. No, a Vicki crepe with a poison pink center.
Minfreda grabbed the carpet roll and dragged it to the construction chute, rejoicing that the opening was close to the floor. She was about to drop Vicki headfirst down the chute when she saw a pink heel on the floor. Minfreda put it on the dead blonde. Vickiâs foot was still warm, and she had pale pink polish on her toes. They looked small and sad.
Minfreda shivered a little. But then she remembered what Vicki had done to her. She straightened her shoulders and walked resolutely back to Vickiâs office.
As she stood in the doorway, she could feel the rage sheâd set loose in the room. But Minfreda had work to do. Fragments of the shattered coffee mug had flown
Blood spattered Vickiâs blonde hair and ran down her cheek. There was an ugly abrasion over her ear. But Minfreda had mostly battered the white bones beneath the pink skin. Vicki was deader than last yearâs vacation schedule. She sat in her executiveâs chair with a deathâs-head grin on her face.
The old mousy Minnie would have panicked when she saw her battered boss. The new Minfreda kept her cool blonde head. She calmly considered what she needed to do.
Vickiâs blood was dripping on her suit and heading for the floor. Minfreda whipped off her neck scarf and wrapped it around the dead blondeâs head. Better, but blood was seeping through it already. Minfreda looked around for something else and saw my typewriter cover. I was the only person in the department who used one. The others didnât care about their machines. The cover was gray plastic. She bundled it around Vickiâs dripping head.
She had to get rid of the body. Vicki was not tall or heavy, but she was a deadweight, no pun intended. Minfreda was strong, but she couldnât move the body without help. She went back to the construction area.
The old sun-faded curtains from the corner office were still in a heap in the back hall. She also saw a lumber cart, like the ones you get at Home Depot nowadays for hauling large purchases.
Minfreda bundled the curtains onto the cart and trundled them back to Vickiâs office. She spread the curtains out on the lumber cart, then tipped Vickiâs chair forward. The exterminated executive landed in the dusty drapes with a deadweight thud.
âItâs curtains for you, boss,â Minfreda said out loud, and tried to suppress a giggle.
The cart was harder to maneuver with the body on it. Minfreda had to shove Vickiâs desk aside to get the cart through the door. The dead blondeâs foot caught in the door frame, and her pink heel was pried off. Minfreda tossed it on top of the body, then cleared a path through the department, carefully moving waste cans and steering around desks until she got to a clear aisle.
Minfreda was sweating like a construction worker. The cart was heavy and awkward. She was worried someone would come back to the office. She kept her ears open for the
ding!
of the elevator doors. But Minfreda was no mouse. Her fear didnât paralyze her. It made her think more clearly.
Once in the dingy back hall, Minfreda pulled the cart near the old torn-up carpet and spread the rug out flat. Then she tugged on the curtains until the body slid off the cart and onto the carpet. She heard the rotted, sun-faded fabric rip, but not before sheâd moved Vicki.
Minfreda had a sneezing fit from the dust, but she rolled up the carpet with Vicki inside. A Vicki taco, if you will. No, a Vicki crepe with a poison pink center.
Minfreda grabbed the carpet roll and dragged it to the construction chute, rejoicing that the opening was close to the floor. She was about to drop Vicki headfirst down the chute when she saw a pink heel on the floor. Minfreda put it on the dead blonde. Vickiâs foot was still warm, and she had pale pink polish on her toes. They looked small and sad.
Minfreda shivered a little. But then she remembered what Vicki had done to her. She straightened her shoulders and walked resolutely back to Vickiâs office.
As she stood in the doorway, she could feel the rage sheâd set loose in the room. But Minfreda had work to do. Fragments of the shattered coffee mug had flown
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