Read Online Keep Holding On by Susane Colasanti - Free Book Online Page B

I’m looking forward to zoning out in that groggy daze induced by artificial foliage and the comforting aroma of Auntie Anne’s pretzels. The mall we go to is forty minutes away. It’s massive. The smaller mall closer to town is where Matt and I were supposed to go. Most kids from school go there. Which is why we come here.
    Even though the massive mall is in another suburb, it feels like a city to me. The town has a more urban feel. It has actual things to do. There’s a zing of excitement in the air, like you know things are happening all around you even if you don’t know what they are.
    Sherae turns onto the road that leads to the highway that leads to the suburban city and, eventually, the real city. This is The Road. The Road leads to Not Here. Which is the best place ever. It’s the road to freedom. It’s the road to a better life, to a place where dreams have a chance to become reality.
    The first thing we do at the mall is get ice-cream cones. Sherae gets strawberry dipped in chocolate. I get vanilla with rainbow sprinkles. Rainbow sprinkles make me happy.
    I’m relieved we’re here. I knew I should have gotten another box of tampons the last time we were here, but I couldn’t sneakaway from Sherae long enough. I’d be mortified if she knew that mother didn’t get them for me. There’s no way I could admit how bad things are.
    It’s hard to be surrounded by everything shiny and new and not buy lots of things for myself. There’s so much I want. But I’ve been very strategic about saving ever since mother stole my money. When I get paid for babysitting, I divide the cash and hide it around my room so mother can’t find it. She doesn’t know that I babysit almost every weekend, so it’s not like she’s wondering where all my money is. I told her that I babysit like once a month and that I spend the money on school supplies.
    We sit by the fountain to eat our ice-cream cones.
    “So … what did Hector’s note say?” I ask.
    “Just that I can’t keep ignoring him forever and why won’t I talk to him.”
    “Why is he acting like he didn’t do anything?”
    “He said he doesn’t even know what he did. Just that I expected him to apologize for something.”
    “How can he not know?”
    Sherae licks her ice cream.
    I feel horrible that Sherae has to go through this. If I could switch places with her to take away her pain, I would. She doesn’t deserve any of this.
    I say, “But do you—”
    “I’m fine.” Sherae gets up and throws the rest of her ice cream out. She didn’t even eat the cone. Which I know is her favorite part.
    Hector used to take Sherae out for ice cream all the time. Heonly likes ice cream in the summer, but he’d take her anyway. It was obvious that Hector adored Sherae. Every time I saw them together, he was either holding her hand or he had his arm around her. Or he was kissing her and I was trying not to look. He gave her special gifts that boys wouldn’t normally think of, like the palm tree snow globe she loves. Or loved. She either put it away somewhere or got rid of it after they broke up. They had a pretty good relationship. But Sherae wasn’t ready for what Hector wanted. And once you cross that line, there’s no going back.
    Maybe Sherae is hiding from me just like I’m hiding from her. Maybe she thinks that if she keeps saying she’s okay, her emotions will believe her. Like how if you smile enough times you can trick your brain into thinking you’re happy.
    Next up is the drugstore. Sherae never needs anything here. She gets a lollipop with a long stem and a cute pink watermelon bobbing on top. We’re not splitting up, so I try to play off the whole getting tampons thing like mother just forgot to buy more. I hope I sound convincing without trying too hard.
    “Where to next?” Sherae says.
    “What about the pet store?” I always stop by the pet store when I’m here. They have such tiny, adorable puppies in the window. I love watching them, but I