Read Online Jamie Brown Is NOT Rich by Adam Wallace - Free Book Online Page A
Authors: Adam Wallace
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pack.
5. Shuffle the cards thoroughly, then look through and select any random card. (In this example, the 5 of spades.) Ask ‘Is this your card?’
6. Pretend to be upset when everyone says you suck, then tell your target to check his back pocket.
7. Accept everyone’s compliments!!!
Oooooh, I love this one too.
1. Secretly check the bottom card (in this example, the 3 of clubs).
2. Cut the cards in half (move cards off the top to the side – don’t use a knife).
3. Have your target select a card off either pile, look at it and don’t tell you.
4. Have them replace their card (in this example, the ace of spades) on the pile that doesn’t have your card at the bottom.
5. Place the pile with your card on top of the other pile.
6. Cut the cards a few times. Take cards off the top, place them on the table, then place the other pile on top.
7. One by one place cards off the top of the pack, face up on the table. The card you are looking for will be the one after your card.
8. Accept everyone’s compliments!!!
CHAPTER 2
THERE’S
CHANGE
A-COMIN’
So we live on Hovel Street and we barely get by and we’re always hungry, but we always have heaps of laughs and like I said, it’s all I’ve ever known.
Except then it wasn’t.
I was playing mini-golf with the triplets on the course Dad made for us.
We never play quietly. We yell and make animal noises and put each other off and we swing our putters in the air and yell ‘BUCKITY BUCKITY!’ We don’t even know what that means. Trav just made it up one day and we’ve said it ever since.
It’s a tough course. Only the skilful get through it …
Suddenly, a car beeped its horn. We all spun round. We always hear cars coming, but usually because they’re so old and dodgy – the muffler’ll be busted and the tyres will have no rubber on them and the bumper will be dragging on the ground. Even our car, which Dad has worked on, is super loud because he can’t get good parts. And when I say super loud, I mean if a rocket blasting off met a sonic boom and they got married and had a baby, and that baby grew up and married nails scraping on a blackboard, and they had a baby … that baby screaming would be how loud our car was.
But this car? It was SO quiet! You couldn’t even hear the motor running.
It was shiny, too. Everything in Hovel Street is grey and dirty and dusty. This car made the sun look dull!
We had no idea why it was in Hovel Street, so we ran up to it. It was almost as long as the Grand Hotel, and it glided over the potholes like they weren’t there. We couldn’t see inside because the windows were all dark … but then one slid open.
‘Hello, boys,’ a man said from inside. ‘We’re here to look at your street.’
‘Why?’ asked Trav. ‘It’s like the worst street ever.’
A kid we couldn’t see yelled from in the car. ‘So we can buy the whole street, knock these awful buildings down, build luxury hotels and apartments and shops, and send you rats back to the sewer.’
The man shushed him, the window slid up, and the car drove off … straight over our mini-golf course, smashing the flags.
‘Hey!’ Maxy yelled. ‘Watch it!’
We heard the kid laughing and then the car turned a corner and was gone.
Trav wasn’t happy. He started dancing around.
‘Oooooh, look at me. I’m a dumb rich dorkhead. I’m in a giant car and I can do whatever I want. Watch me headbutt this building. I’m so rich it won’t even hurt.’
He headbutted the building.
He’s not rich.
It hurt.
He knocked himself out.
The others kept talking about the richies, but I was quiet. I know the kid had been mean, but I’d seen the car. I’d seen inside the car. I’d seen the comfy seats without holes and the fridge and the TV and suddenly I didn’t want to be in Hovel Street anymore. I’d seen the light, and the light was fancy and sparkly and rich.
The next day we were throwing sultanas in the air and catching them on our
5. Shuffle the cards thoroughly, then look through and select any random card. (In this example, the 5 of spades.) Ask ‘Is this your card?’
6. Pretend to be upset when everyone says you suck, then tell your target to check his back pocket.
7. Accept everyone’s compliments!!!
Oooooh, I love this one too.
1. Secretly check the bottom card (in this example, the 3 of clubs).
2. Cut the cards in half (move cards off the top to the side – don’t use a knife).
3. Have your target select a card off either pile, look at it and don’t tell you.
4. Have them replace their card (in this example, the ace of spades) on the pile that doesn’t have your card at the bottom.
5. Place the pile with your card on top of the other pile.
6. Cut the cards a few times. Take cards off the top, place them on the table, then place the other pile on top.
7. One by one place cards off the top of the pack, face up on the table. The card you are looking for will be the one after your card.
8. Accept everyone’s compliments!!!
CHAPTER 2
THERE’S
CHANGE
A-COMIN’
So we live on Hovel Street and we barely get by and we’re always hungry, but we always have heaps of laughs and like I said, it’s all I’ve ever known.
Except then it wasn’t.
I was playing mini-golf with the triplets on the course Dad made for us.
We never play quietly. We yell and make animal noises and put each other off and we swing our putters in the air and yell ‘BUCKITY BUCKITY!’ We don’t even know what that means. Trav just made it up one day and we’ve said it ever since.
It’s a tough course. Only the skilful get through it …
Suddenly, a car beeped its horn. We all spun round. We always hear cars coming, but usually because they’re so old and dodgy – the muffler’ll be busted and the tyres will have no rubber on them and the bumper will be dragging on the ground. Even our car, which Dad has worked on, is super loud because he can’t get good parts. And when I say super loud, I mean if a rocket blasting off met a sonic boom and they got married and had a baby, and that baby grew up and married nails scraping on a blackboard, and they had a baby … that baby screaming would be how loud our car was.
But this car? It was SO quiet! You couldn’t even hear the motor running.
It was shiny, too. Everything in Hovel Street is grey and dirty and dusty. This car made the sun look dull!
We had no idea why it was in Hovel Street, so we ran up to it. It was almost as long as the Grand Hotel, and it glided over the potholes like they weren’t there. We couldn’t see inside because the windows were all dark … but then one slid open.
‘Hello, boys,’ a man said from inside. ‘We’re here to look at your street.’
‘Why?’ asked Trav. ‘It’s like the worst street ever.’
A kid we couldn’t see yelled from in the car. ‘So we can buy the whole street, knock these awful buildings down, build luxury hotels and apartments and shops, and send you rats back to the sewer.’
The man shushed him, the window slid up, and the car drove off … straight over our mini-golf course, smashing the flags.
‘Hey!’ Maxy yelled. ‘Watch it!’
We heard the kid laughing and then the car turned a corner and was gone.
Trav wasn’t happy. He started dancing around.
‘Oooooh, look at me. I’m a dumb rich dorkhead. I’m in a giant car and I can do whatever I want. Watch me headbutt this building. I’m so rich it won’t even hurt.’
He headbutted the building.
He’s not rich.
It hurt.
He knocked himself out.
The others kept talking about the richies, but I was quiet. I know the kid had been mean, but I’d seen the car. I’d seen inside the car. I’d seen the comfy seats without holes and the fridge and the TV and suddenly I didn’t want to be in Hovel Street anymore. I’d seen the light, and the light was fancy and sparkly and rich.
The next day we were throwing sultanas in the air and catching them on our
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