had also come with Everything On It.
“ Hits the spot. Amazed I have any appetite. Who let you in, by the way? ”
“ Posed as a drug snitch, fools ’em every time, all ’em bright new faces, still naive I guess. ”
“ Not enough to stay here any longer than they have to. ” Even though Doc was watching carefully, somehow the rest of the hot dog had disap peared. “ Look at this miserable place. It ’s The Endless Bummer. Everybody else will move on, but guess who, for his sins, will remain stuck out here forever in Gordita, nothin but penny-ante collars, kids under the pier dealing their moms ’ downers, when I should be in West L.A. or Hollywood Division, at least. ”
“ Center of the cop universe for sure, ” Doc nodding sympathetically, “ but we can ’ t all be Bigfoot Bjornsen can we—ups I mean who ’ d want to be him anyway? ” hoping this wasn ’ t pushing things, given Pat ’ s mental health, frail on the best of days.
“ At this point, ” Pat replied grimly, a quiver in his lower lip, “ I ’ d settle for a life swap even with him, yes trade what I ’ ve got for what ’ s behind the door where Carol is standing you might say, even if it turns out to be a zonk—in Bigfoot ’ s bracket how bad of a deal could that be? ”
“ Weird, Pat, ‘ cause what I hear is, is he ’ s scuffling these days. You ’ d know better than me, o ’ course. ”
Pat squinted. “ You ’ re awfully inquisitive today, Sportello. I would have noticed sooner if I wasn ’ t so upset with career issues which are no doubt beyond you. Is Bigfoot giving you problems again? Call the Inter nal Affairs Hot Line, it ’ s toll-free— 800-bentcop. ”
“ Not that I ’ d ever file a complaint or nothin, Lieutenant, understand, but how desperate, man, blood out of a turnip, even the most wasted spare-change artist up on Hollywood Boulevard knows enough to pass me by anymore, but not that Bigfoot, oh no. ”
You could see a struggle going on here in Pat ’ s mind, between two major cop reflexes—envy of another cop ’ s career versus hatred of hip pies. Envy won out. “ He didn ’ t actually quote you a sum 7 . ”
“ He listed some expenses, ” Doc started improvising, and saw Pat ’ s ears definitely change angle. “ Personal, departmental. I told him I always thought he was better connected than that. He got philosophical. ‘ People forget, ’ is how he put it. ‘ No matter what you may have done for them in the past, you can never count on them when you need them. ’”
Pat shook his head. “ And with the risks he ’ s taken ... A lesson to us all. Some real ungrateful fuckers in that business, huh? ” He had this Art Fleming look on his face, like Doc was now supposed to guess which business, exactly.
Doc in turn made with the blank hippie stare that could mean any thing, and which if held long enough was sure to unnerve any quadrilat eral in uniform, till Pat shifted his eyes away, mumbling, “ Ah. Yeah I get you. Groovy. ‘ Course, ” he added after some reflection, “ he ’ s got all them residuals. ”
Doc by now had very little idea what they might be talking about. “ I try to stay awake for those reruns, ” he hazarded, “ but somehow I always crash before Bigfoot ’ s are on. ”
“ Well, Mr. News At Ten ’ s got himself another case of the century now, since Mickey Wolfmann ’ s gorilla got wasted ... Let the others have Benedict Canyon and Sharon Tate and them, for the right chief investigator this one could be a bottomless source of cash. ”
“ You mean ... ”
“ It ’ s bound to be a Movie for TV, ain ’ t it, whatever happens. Bigfoot can end up with script and production credits, even play himself, the ass hole, but ups, eleventh-commandment issues, ignore that I said that. ”
“ Not to mention if he gets Mickey back, he ’ s a big public hero. ”
“ Yeah, if. But what if he ’ s too close t o this? Some point it begins to fuck with your
“ Hits the spot. Amazed I have any appetite. Who let you in, by the way? ”
“ Posed as a drug snitch, fools ’em every time, all ’em bright new faces, still naive I guess. ”
“ Not enough to stay here any longer than they have to. ” Even though Doc was watching carefully, somehow the rest of the hot dog had disap peared. “ Look at this miserable place. It ’s The Endless Bummer. Everybody else will move on, but guess who, for his sins, will remain stuck out here forever in Gordita, nothin but penny-ante collars, kids under the pier dealing their moms ’ downers, when I should be in West L.A. or Hollywood Division, at least. ”
“ Center of the cop universe for sure, ” Doc nodding sympathetically, “ but we can ’ t all be Bigfoot Bjornsen can we—ups I mean who ’ d want to be him anyway? ” hoping this wasn ’ t pushing things, given Pat ’ s mental health, frail on the best of days.
“ At this point, ” Pat replied grimly, a quiver in his lower lip, “ I ’ d settle for a life swap even with him, yes trade what I ’ ve got for what ’ s behind the door where Carol is standing you might say, even if it turns out to be a zonk—in Bigfoot ’ s bracket how bad of a deal could that be? ”
“ Weird, Pat, ‘ cause what I hear is, is he ’ s scuffling these days. You ’ d know better than me, o ’ course. ”
Pat squinted. “ You ’ re awfully inquisitive today, Sportello. I would have noticed sooner if I wasn ’ t so upset with career issues which are no doubt beyond you. Is Bigfoot giving you problems again? Call the Inter nal Affairs Hot Line, it ’ s toll-free— 800-bentcop. ”
“ Not that I ’ d ever file a complaint or nothin, Lieutenant, understand, but how desperate, man, blood out of a turnip, even the most wasted spare-change artist up on Hollywood Boulevard knows enough to pass me by anymore, but not that Bigfoot, oh no. ”
You could see a struggle going on here in Pat ’ s mind, between two major cop reflexes—envy of another cop ’ s career versus hatred of hip pies. Envy won out. “ He didn ’ t actually quote you a sum 7 . ”
“ He listed some expenses, ” Doc started improvising, and saw Pat ’ s ears definitely change angle. “ Personal, departmental. I told him I always thought he was better connected than that. He got philosophical. ‘ People forget, ’ is how he put it. ‘ No matter what you may have done for them in the past, you can never count on them when you need them. ’”
Pat shook his head. “ And with the risks he ’ s taken ... A lesson to us all. Some real ungrateful fuckers in that business, huh? ” He had this Art Fleming look on his face, like Doc was now supposed to guess which business, exactly.
Doc in turn made with the blank hippie stare that could mean any thing, and which if held long enough was sure to unnerve any quadrilat eral in uniform, till Pat shifted his eyes away, mumbling, “ Ah. Yeah I get you. Groovy. ‘ Course, ” he added after some reflection, “ he ’ s got all them residuals. ”
Doc by now had very little idea what they might be talking about. “ I try to stay awake for those reruns, ” he hazarded, “ but somehow I always crash before Bigfoot ’ s are on. ”
“ Well, Mr. News At Ten ’ s got himself another case of the century now, since Mickey Wolfmann ’ s gorilla got wasted ... Let the others have Benedict Canyon and Sharon Tate and them, for the right chief investigator this one could be a bottomless source of cash. ”
“ You mean ... ”
“ It ’ s bound to be a Movie for TV, ain ’ t it, whatever happens. Bigfoot can end up with script and production credits, even play himself, the ass hole, but ups, eleventh-commandment issues, ignore that I said that. ”
“ Not to mention if he gets Mickey back, he ’ s a big public hero. ”
“ Yeah, if. But what if he ’ s too close t o this? Some point it begins to fuck with your
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