Read Online Indigo by Richard Wiley - Free Book Online

would be like without orderly laws. How could men live under the old sets of rules, survival of the fittest, an eye for an eye? Not since he was a child had he thought of himself in terms of whether or not he was physically brave. Not since he was a child had such thoughts had any place in his life.
    As he lay there, exhausted but completely awake, Jerry imagined himself relating the experiences of the last day and a half. When he told this story would he embellish, would he, perhaps, make it humorous, or would he recount accurately the depth and the surprising quality of his fear? Jerry Neal turned in his bed and decided that this was a story that he would not tell. And as sleep came down to take him he understood that not since Charlotte’s death had an event outside himself made him feel so exposed and alone. He was not an introspective man but he did feel uneasy with the idea that should he choose to mine the depths of his heart he was not sure what he would find there, or whether he would like what he found at all.

    Though Jerry had set his alarm for six, a group of teachers found Jules and told him to turn the alarm off, to let the man sleep until he woke. Jules took pleasure in stealing into the darkened bedroom and pushing the alarm’s button down. The slack flesh of his employer’s face drew him, and for a moment he looked at Jerry Neal and felt sorry. He could see the old man who would come in the next few years, the dormant evidence that death waited for us all.
    Jerry’s bedroom had thick curtains, and when he finally awoke he assumed that, as sometimes happened, he would have another moment or two before his alarm sounded. On these occasions he thought of the extra time as a gift from Charlotte, and he used it to remember a pleasant moment that they had shared or merely to picture Charlotte in some contemplative or restful mood. It was Jerry’s practice, during these times, to try to remember an aspect of Charlotte as yet unremembered since its occurrence during her lifetime, and on this morning he remembered Charlotte’s outrage with the city of Tillamook over the upkeep of a memorial for those who died in the famous Tillamook fire. Charlotte’s grandfather had died in the fire and she was furious that the memorial was unkempt. Jerry envied Charlotte’s capacity for outrage and wished he’d found more in himself at yesterday’s fire.
    Long moments passed and when Jerry heard a pounding on his outside door and looked at his clock, he discovered that it was nearly ten. He jumped from his bed and stormed into the living room, ready to scream at Jules, but the board president was there, and Jules was giving him coffee.
    â€œJerry,” said Leonard Holtz, “do you need to see a doctor? God, what an experience that must have been.”
    â€œI overslept,” the principal said.
    Leonard Holtz threw his briefcase onto a chair. “I’ve spoken with Biko and I’ve informed the ambassador. This kind of thing is uncalled for, man. Let them frame another Nigerrian if they’re going to frame somebody.”
    â€œI would have called you last night,” said Jerry, “but I didn’t trust the phones.”
    Leonard said that he’d scheduled a special school board meeting for ten. “Whatever happens,” he said, “I know this time we will be united.”
    Jules brought out orange juice and crepes and put two warmed plates on the dining-room table. Jerry wondered if his steward knew the details of what had happened, but when he looked at Jules he couldn’t tell, and when Jules was gone again Leonard Holtz lowered his voice. “When the ambassador first heard about this he told me to get you out of the country today,” he said. “He’s changed his tune about that but he’s calling the president’s office this morning. When this ambassador gets worked up there’s always hell to pay.”
    Jerry guessed he