Read Online If Ever I Loved You by Phyllis Halldorson - Free Book Online
Authors: Phyllis Halldorson
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darling, I'd gladly chuck the manuscript and spend the day
making love to you."
Gina felt her face grow hot with embarrassment and she
groaned inwardly. How could she have been so clumsy as to let him think
even for a minute that… ?
"I—I didn't mean that," she stammered and
realized she'd compounded her blunder as a shadow of pain flittered
across his features before he could bring it under control.
"No," he murmured sadly, "I didn't think you did."
She wrapped her hands around the warm mug and took a deep
breath. "I have something to tell you. I know now that I should have
told you months ago, but I had no idea there would be so
many—so many ramifications."
Stewart looked at her questioningly and she knew that the
only way to start was at the beginning. "When I was eighteen I married
Peter Van Housen," she blurted.
Stewart blanched. "You what?"
She took a swallow of her coffee and set it on the coffee
table. "I was very young and naive and I believed him when he said he
loved me, but that was a long time ago. It won't make any difference to
us. I hate him. He's a cruel, arrogant, son of a—"
Her voice had risen and she knew she sounded a little
hysterical but she couldn't seem to control it. It was Stewart's hands
cupping her shoulders and his cool voice that calmed her. "Take it
easy, honey. Just take a deep breath and tell me what happened."
She did, and as the words poured out her thoughts seemed
to pull together and she told the story much as she had told it to
Twyla. She watched Stewart, wanting to gauge the hurt she was
inflicting so she could ease it as much as possible. But his expression
was closed, impersonal, and she had no idea what he was thinking or
feeling.
Almost an hour later she brought her narration to a close
by recounting Peter's abandonment and Mel's confession that he had
arranged for the photograph and then given it to Veronica who in turn
sent it to Peter. Stewart had been sitting quietly and, except for a
muttered oath now and then, had made no comment. Now as she sat with
her head bowed mutely looking at her hands twisted together in her lap,
he reached for her and she snuggled into the safe protection of his
embrace.
As she rested against his chest she could feel the tension
that ran through him and she knew he wasn't as calm and collected as he
wanted her to think. "You're right, Gina," he said. "You should have
told me before. Now I understand why you've been so reluctant to let
any man close to you, why you were in such a state at the wedding and
reception."
His arms tightened around her. "I'll take care of Peter
Van Housen," he muttered grimly. "When I get through with him he won't
hurt you or bother you ever again. I guarantee it."
Gina wished she could just relax and let Stewart handle
the matter, but she knew that was impossible. She hadn't finished her
story, the most important point was yet to come. She disengaged herself
from him and stood. "You don't understand, Stewart. Peter came to see
me yesterday."
She started to walk restlessly away from the couch, then
turned and looked back at him and clenched her fists as she continued,
"He says that he never filed those annulment papers. He says we're
still married. That I'm still his wife!"
Chapter Five
Gina watched the blood drain from his face as he stared at
her, a look of shocked disbelief etched in his features. "Why would he
keep the marriage intact all these years when it was
he
who walked out on
you
?" Stewart roared.
Gina shook her head. "I don't know, I was as stunned as
you. He said something about an absentee wife giving him protection
from making the same mistake again."
Stewart rose from the couch and swore with an earthiness
Gina had never heard him use before. "Good Lord, you could have married
and had children without ever knowing…"
His large frame filled the small room as he started to
pace. "Well that's an oversight we can take care of in a hurry. Give me
a couple of minutes to shower and change
making love to you."
Gina felt her face grow hot with embarrassment and she
groaned inwardly. How could she have been so clumsy as to let him think
even for a minute that… ?
"I—I didn't mean that," she stammered and
realized she'd compounded her blunder as a shadow of pain flittered
across his features before he could bring it under control.
"No," he murmured sadly, "I didn't think you did."
She wrapped her hands around the warm mug and took a deep
breath. "I have something to tell you. I know now that I should have
told you months ago, but I had no idea there would be so
many—so many ramifications."
Stewart looked at her questioningly and she knew that the
only way to start was at the beginning. "When I was eighteen I married
Peter Van Housen," she blurted.
Stewart blanched. "You what?"
She took a swallow of her coffee and set it on the coffee
table. "I was very young and naive and I believed him when he said he
loved me, but that was a long time ago. It won't make any difference to
us. I hate him. He's a cruel, arrogant, son of a—"
Her voice had risen and she knew she sounded a little
hysterical but she couldn't seem to control it. It was Stewart's hands
cupping her shoulders and his cool voice that calmed her. "Take it
easy, honey. Just take a deep breath and tell me what happened."
She did, and as the words poured out her thoughts seemed
to pull together and she told the story much as she had told it to
Twyla. She watched Stewart, wanting to gauge the hurt she was
inflicting so she could ease it as much as possible. But his expression
was closed, impersonal, and she had no idea what he was thinking or
feeling.
Almost an hour later she brought her narration to a close
by recounting Peter's abandonment and Mel's confession that he had
arranged for the photograph and then given it to Veronica who in turn
sent it to Peter. Stewart had been sitting quietly and, except for a
muttered oath now and then, had made no comment. Now as she sat with
her head bowed mutely looking at her hands twisted together in her lap,
he reached for her and she snuggled into the safe protection of his
embrace.
As she rested against his chest she could feel the tension
that ran through him and she knew he wasn't as calm and collected as he
wanted her to think. "You're right, Gina," he said. "You should have
told me before. Now I understand why you've been so reluctant to let
any man close to you, why you were in such a state at the wedding and
reception."
His arms tightened around her. "I'll take care of Peter
Van Housen," he muttered grimly. "When I get through with him he won't
hurt you or bother you ever again. I guarantee it."
Gina wished she could just relax and let Stewart handle
the matter, but she knew that was impossible. She hadn't finished her
story, the most important point was yet to come. She disengaged herself
from him and stood. "You don't understand, Stewart. Peter came to see
me yesterday."
She started to walk restlessly away from the couch, then
turned and looked back at him and clenched her fists as she continued,
"He says that he never filed those annulment papers. He says we're
still married. That I'm still his wife!"
Chapter Five
Gina watched the blood drain from his face as he stared at
her, a look of shocked disbelief etched in his features. "Why would he
keep the marriage intact all these years when it was
he
who walked out on
you
?" Stewart roared.
Gina shook her head. "I don't know, I was as stunned as
you. He said something about an absentee wife giving him protection
from making the same mistake again."
Stewart rose from the couch and swore with an earthiness
Gina had never heard him use before. "Good Lord, you could have married
and had children without ever knowing…"
His large frame filled the small room as he started to
pace. "Well that's an oversight we can take care of in a hurry. Give me
a couple of minutes to shower and change
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