How to Wash a Cat

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Authors: Rebecca M. Hale
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of his pockets and smoothed it on the counter. “Here’s what we came up with from before.”
    I stood on my tiptoes to look over Monty’s frigid shoulder and Ivan’s firm, muscular one. With one glimpse I understood Monty’s paralysis.
    Ivan’s sheet of sketches was almost identical to the ones Monty had created for me two nights earlier.

Chapter 8

    “PERHAPS,” MONTY SAID painfully, struggling to clear his throat as he turned around to face me. “I should explain.”
    Ivan glanced up from the sheet of sketches he’d spread out on the counter. From the quizzical expression on his face, he seemed unaware that his work had been pirated.
    I sat down in the dental chair, a wave of suspicion surging over me. Monty approached me apprehensively, his face strobing blotchily from an embarrassed violet red to a colorless gray ash. He pulled a trembling hand through the curls on the top of his head.
    “You see,” Monty gulped, beads of sweat glistening on his forehead, “it all started at the last board meeting.” He stuck a finger into the snug space between his neck and bow tie and tugged to loosen it.
    “You know your neighbor, Frank Napis?” Monty tipped his head towards the southeast wall. “He’s the guy who runs the shop next door.”
    I nodded, my expression still stoic, as Monty stepped closer to the dental chair.
    “For the last several months—ever since Frank moved in there—he’s been petitioning the board with complaints against the Green Vase. He brought another one at the board meeting last week.”
    Ivan cut in, his voice solemn. “There’ve been rumors that Frank was building a case to have the Green Vase condemned—so it could be seized by the city and put up for sale.”
    Monty waved a dismissive hand. “Oh, Miranda would never let him get away with that, I’m sure.” He smiled reassuringly at my concerned expression. “Look, once you start work on the renovations, Frank won’t have a leg to stand on.”
    I felt a worried tension winding around my shoulders. “So what happened at the last board meeting?” I asked.
    “Right,” Monty said, slapping his hands together. “This time, Frank was complaining about Oscar’s gutters.”
    Monty began to circle the room, the soles of his shoes clacking softly on the wood floors. “Everyone was there—except Oscar. I’ve never been able to figure out why Miranda let him get away with that.”
    “And Gordon,” Ivan piped in. “The board chairman, Gordon Bosco, wasn’t there, either.”
    “Oh, yes, I forgot about him,” Monty said, tilting his head thoughtfully. “He hasn’t been to a meeting in ages—he’s been too busy. I guess that’s why he’s stepping down.”
    Monty aimed a raised eyebrow towards the dental chair. “Gordon invested in a biotech start-up a while back. I think they made him CEO of the company. I hear they’re about to announce progress on a huge milestone. It’s all very hush, hush, of course.”
    Monty thumped the rubbery cartilage on the end of his nose as his eyes glassed over. “You know, I’ve been wondering who they’re going to pick to take Gordon’s place. I’ve been thinking about tossing my hat into the ring.” His head swung hopefully back and forth between Ivan and me. “I’d make an excellent choice, don’t you think?”
    Ivan averted his eyes from Monty’s questioning look; I stared up at the ceiling, the corners of my mouth curling skeptically.
    Monty cleared his throat and resumed his pacing. “So, Frank claimed he’d suffered water damage in one of the back rooms of his building, because the water wasn’t draining properly from Oscar’s gutters.”
    Monty streamed around a pile of boxes to give a knowing look at Ivan. “Mold. Nasty stuff—especially for old buildings.”
    “Mmm,” Ivan hummed encouragingly, amused at the spectacle unfolding in front of him.
    Monty turned back in towards the center of the room. “It was the same old song and dance—Napis whining that the

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