around as she chewed.
Angel had some pieces of carrot and apple in her pocket and held them out. Dorothy, the goat, pushed her saggy middle through the bush and appeared in front of us. She had a plump udder hanging down, bony hips, and dirty, knobbly knees. Her golden eyes were very interested in what we had in our hands.
Angel coaxed her down the hillside, feeding her small pieces of the carrot like they were sweets. Then she let me lure her into the yard with apple chunks. It made me giggle, Dorothy’s soft lips nibbling at my fingers.
“You can go now,” Angel said, tying some rope around the goat’s neck.
“But I said I’d take her back to Mrs. Barker,” I said.
“Not yet.”
“Why are you keeping her?”
Angel’s mouth twitched from side to side.
“For the milk,” she said.
“Oh,” I said, wrinkling my nose. “Have you got that thing where you can’t drink cow’s milk?”
She seemed to think for a whole minute.
“No, I haven’t,” she said, frowning. “Just go now.”
I wished she wouldn’t do that. Angel had a way of making me feel part of her, then as if I had nothing to do with her at all. But then she said, “If you go away now, you can come with me and find the horse later.”
“But—”
I’d thought Angel was keeping Belle in the stable! Had I got it all wrong again, like I had been thinking the goat was in there?
Angel smiled as if she’d known what I had been thinking. She seemed pleased that she was still able to keep things hidden and I couldn’t figure them out. Then I realized she knew I would be scared of the horse and wouldn’t want to go. It hurt thinking she was pushing me away again. But then she said gently, “I’ll come and get you later, and we’ll find Belle, and you’ll see she would never hurt you.”
I went back to Aunt Liv’s, helped her box up some duck and goose eggs. Which was a good way to try to teach Alfie and Gem the six times table. Then we sprawled around the table, and I watched Alfie making moss hedges for their toy farm and listened to Gem make up stories about her magic plastic animals. And then Mom phoned and I told her about Gabriel and she laughed and said, “I’m glad you’ve found some special things there.”
Later I went down to see Maggie with Gem and Alfie. We counted her piglets, all ten of them. We hung over the gate and kicked our legs up and watched the piglets wriggling and guzzling. I saw Gabriel, the tiny one that Angel had saved, pushing her way in. I picked her up and didn’t want to let her go.
I waited all day, but Angel didn’t come. And I still didn’t have the carousel, which was starting to seem like another made-up thing that didn’t really exist.
Twenty-Two
I woke. Something tapped at the half-open window.
I got up and looked down. Angel was standing on the lawn.
“What are you doing?” I whispered.
“Come on,” she whispered back, dropping the stones she had been throwing at the window. “We’re going to find Belle.”
“Now? You said later.”
“It is later.” She laughed.
It was dark, but the moon lightened the inky sky. The garden was full of shadows; nothing stirred, except something buzzing in my brain.
“I can’t,” I said.
“Why not?”
And I was thinking, Don’t you ever listen to what your mom says you have to do?
“Because I’m not allowed and it’s dark and people don’t go out in the night. We’re supposed to be sleeping and—”
“What are you scared of?” she hissed. “Nobody’s going to see us.”
She shrugged and walked away. But there was something alive inside me. I did want to go. I wanted to follow her. Maybe I wanted to be even more like her.
“Wait!” I whispered.
I threw my coat over my pajamas, put on my rubber boots, and ran out to join her. I’d never done anything like that before—gone out in the middle of the night, without even telling anybody.
Suddenly she was standing in front of me, her eyes vivid in the silver light
Angel had some pieces of carrot and apple in her pocket and held them out. Dorothy, the goat, pushed her saggy middle through the bush and appeared in front of us. She had a plump udder hanging down, bony hips, and dirty, knobbly knees. Her golden eyes were very interested in what we had in our hands.
Angel coaxed her down the hillside, feeding her small pieces of the carrot like they were sweets. Then she let me lure her into the yard with apple chunks. It made me giggle, Dorothy’s soft lips nibbling at my fingers.
“You can go now,” Angel said, tying some rope around the goat’s neck.
“But I said I’d take her back to Mrs. Barker,” I said.
“Not yet.”
“Why are you keeping her?”
Angel’s mouth twitched from side to side.
“For the milk,” she said.
“Oh,” I said, wrinkling my nose. “Have you got that thing where you can’t drink cow’s milk?”
She seemed to think for a whole minute.
“No, I haven’t,” she said, frowning. “Just go now.”
I wished she wouldn’t do that. Angel had a way of making me feel part of her, then as if I had nothing to do with her at all. But then she said, “If you go away now, you can come with me and find the horse later.”
“But—”
I’d thought Angel was keeping Belle in the stable! Had I got it all wrong again, like I had been thinking the goat was in there?
Angel smiled as if she’d known what I had been thinking. She seemed pleased that she was still able to keep things hidden and I couldn’t figure them out. Then I realized she knew I would be scared of the horse and wouldn’t want to go. It hurt thinking she was pushing me away again. But then she said gently, “I’ll come and get you later, and we’ll find Belle, and you’ll see she would never hurt you.”
I went back to Aunt Liv’s, helped her box up some duck and goose eggs. Which was a good way to try to teach Alfie and Gem the six times table. Then we sprawled around the table, and I watched Alfie making moss hedges for their toy farm and listened to Gem make up stories about her magic plastic animals. And then Mom phoned and I told her about Gabriel and she laughed and said, “I’m glad you’ve found some special things there.”
Later I went down to see Maggie with Gem and Alfie. We counted her piglets, all ten of them. We hung over the gate and kicked our legs up and watched the piglets wriggling and guzzling. I saw Gabriel, the tiny one that Angel had saved, pushing her way in. I picked her up and didn’t want to let her go.
I waited all day, but Angel didn’t come. And I still didn’t have the carousel, which was starting to seem like another made-up thing that didn’t really exist.
Twenty-Two
I woke. Something tapped at the half-open window.
I got up and looked down. Angel was standing on the lawn.
“What are you doing?” I whispered.
“Come on,” she whispered back, dropping the stones she had been throwing at the window. “We’re going to find Belle.”
“Now? You said later.”
“It is later.” She laughed.
It was dark, but the moon lightened the inky sky. The garden was full of shadows; nothing stirred, except something buzzing in my brain.
“I can’t,” I said.
“Why not?”
And I was thinking, Don’t you ever listen to what your mom says you have to do?
“Because I’m not allowed and it’s dark and people don’t go out in the night. We’re supposed to be sleeping and—”
“What are you scared of?” she hissed. “Nobody’s going to see us.”
She shrugged and walked away. But there was something alive inside me. I did want to go. I wanted to follow her. Maybe I wanted to be even more like her.
“Wait!” I whispered.
I threw my coat over my pajamas, put on my rubber boots, and ran out to join her. I’d never done anything like that before—gone out in the middle of the night, without even telling anybody.
Suddenly she was standing in front of me, her eyes vivid in the silver light
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