eye honed by ten years of motherhood. “I don’t believe that for a second. Did he spent the night?”
“No!” Steph reddened at the emphatic way she answered. “We just had dinner and walked Mickey afterward. Then Finn went back to his hotel.”
“But you had a great time, right?” Beth tried to prime the pump.
“Who is this again?” Laurie asked Beth, who rolled her eyes.
“Finn Hartley. The big, outdoorsy hunk she dated in Phoenix and has mooned over ever since.” Beth turned back to her. “When are you going to see him again?” Annoyed by the way Steph continued eating to avoid talking, she grabbed her sister’s fork. “You are seeing him again, right?”
“I doubt it,” Steph answered, shoving her plate away and taking a deep breath. “I’m not in the market, and I think he got the idea.”
“Not in the market?” Laurie shot Beth a look, then they both turned on her with gathering suspicion. “So, you told him about the big C and he ran screaming for the nearest exit?”
Stephanie’s silence and the sag of her shoulders told more than she would have liked. “Look, I’m not ready for the kind of stuff…for being with a man that way.”
“So, how did he react when you told him why you’re not ready?” “I didn’t.”
That ignited a firestorm of sisterly concern and advice. She had to get over the idea that she was damaged and undesirable, they told her. She was wonderful and fun and beautiful and talented, and if he was worth anything as a man, he’d count himself lucky just to know her, they said. If he had any idea what she’d been through, he’d realize what a brilliant, courageous woman she was. She ought to tell him. She ought to tell everybody—business image be damned! She’d had breast cancer and survived it. That was something to be proud of, just as they were proud of her.
Half an hour later, the tears had dried and a second pot of coffee was brewing, and Steph was trying not to give in to the temptation to dish details like a thirteen-year-old at a slumber party. Brothers-in-law Griff and Rich entered to raid the fridge, and demanded to know the occasion for the estrogen-fest.
“Steph’s got a boyfriend,” Beth declared, beaming.
“Now rea—” Steph started to protest.
“Finn Hartley. A guy she dated in Phoenix.” Laurie talked over her.
“Finn?” Griff brightened and looked at Beth. “Hartley? Isn’t that the guy we met that time we flew out to see her?”
As Beth nodded, Rich snagged a can of soda and looked at Griff. “So, do we like him?” he asked.
“Hell, yeah. He’s a big deal at Damon’s.” Griff held up a hand for a gleeful high five. “We just got us a ticket to sporting man’s heaven!”
* * *
The glow of her family’s support lasted just long enough for Steph to drive home and take Mickey out for a Sunday walk. The sun was high and warm, and the earthy scents of moist ground and new grass lured the dog into every available corner. She let him explore while thinking about what her sisters had said, and feeling a little guilty that she’d misrepresented Finn to them—at least partly. If she had revealed that he’d been volunteering at a breast cancer retreat, they’d have thought she was crazy for not telling him and throwing herself into his saintly arms.
They loved her dearly and were doing their best to help her adjust to her new reality, but they weren’t used to seeing their big sister in anything but a take-charge sort of role. She couldn’t help feeling that they were trying to get her back into their comfort zone as much as hers. They just couldn’t understand how vulnerable breast cancer made a woman feel. A part of her femininity had been cut away. A part of what she had always hoped to give the man she loved was damaged. And while it was true that she was still the same person, she was also different now, and always would be.
Cancer was more than just a passing phase, it was a recurring threat that would be
“No!” Steph reddened at the emphatic way she answered. “We just had dinner and walked Mickey afterward. Then Finn went back to his hotel.”
“But you had a great time, right?” Beth tried to prime the pump.
“Who is this again?” Laurie asked Beth, who rolled her eyes.
“Finn Hartley. The big, outdoorsy hunk she dated in Phoenix and has mooned over ever since.” Beth turned back to her. “When are you going to see him again?” Annoyed by the way Steph continued eating to avoid talking, she grabbed her sister’s fork. “You are seeing him again, right?”
“I doubt it,” Steph answered, shoving her plate away and taking a deep breath. “I’m not in the market, and I think he got the idea.”
“Not in the market?” Laurie shot Beth a look, then they both turned on her with gathering suspicion. “So, you told him about the big C and he ran screaming for the nearest exit?”
Stephanie’s silence and the sag of her shoulders told more than she would have liked. “Look, I’m not ready for the kind of stuff…for being with a man that way.”
“So, how did he react when you told him why you’re not ready?” “I didn’t.”
That ignited a firestorm of sisterly concern and advice. She had to get over the idea that she was damaged and undesirable, they told her. She was wonderful and fun and beautiful and talented, and if he was worth anything as a man, he’d count himself lucky just to know her, they said. If he had any idea what she’d been through, he’d realize what a brilliant, courageous woman she was. She ought to tell him. She ought to tell everybody—business image be damned! She’d had breast cancer and survived it. That was something to be proud of, just as they were proud of her.
Half an hour later, the tears had dried and a second pot of coffee was brewing, and Steph was trying not to give in to the temptation to dish details like a thirteen-year-old at a slumber party. Brothers-in-law Griff and Rich entered to raid the fridge, and demanded to know the occasion for the estrogen-fest.
“Steph’s got a boyfriend,” Beth declared, beaming.
“Now rea—” Steph started to protest.
“Finn Hartley. A guy she dated in Phoenix.” Laurie talked over her.
“Finn?” Griff brightened and looked at Beth. “Hartley? Isn’t that the guy we met that time we flew out to see her?”
As Beth nodded, Rich snagged a can of soda and looked at Griff. “So, do we like him?” he asked.
“Hell, yeah. He’s a big deal at Damon’s.” Griff held up a hand for a gleeful high five. “We just got us a ticket to sporting man’s heaven!”
* * *
The glow of her family’s support lasted just long enough for Steph to drive home and take Mickey out for a Sunday walk. The sun was high and warm, and the earthy scents of moist ground and new grass lured the dog into every available corner. She let him explore while thinking about what her sisters had said, and feeling a little guilty that she’d misrepresented Finn to them—at least partly. If she had revealed that he’d been volunteering at a breast cancer retreat, they’d have thought she was crazy for not telling him and throwing herself into his saintly arms.
They loved her dearly and were doing their best to help her adjust to her new reality, but they weren’t used to seeing their big sister in anything but a take-charge sort of role. She couldn’t help feeling that they were trying to get her back into their comfort zone as much as hers. They just couldn’t understand how vulnerable breast cancer made a woman feel. A part of her femininity had been cut away. A part of what she had always hoped to give the man she loved was damaged. And while it was true that she was still the same person, she was also different now, and always would be.
Cancer was more than just a passing phase, it was a recurring threat that would be
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