Read Online Heart of Glass by Lindy Dale - Free Book Online Page B

bit of shit at school. Are you okay?” I couldn’t
understand why he kept asking me that.  He clearly had no real
feelings for me. Why would he care how I felt?
    “ I’ll cope. Lucy said a lot
of stuff…. why did you sleep with her?”
    Ben was silent for a minute,
his eyes lost in thought.
    “ I was drunk and she was
real insistent. I guess I was a bit sick of getting knocked back
all the time.”
    “ I thought you were okay
with me wanting to take it slow.  I’m fifteen Ben. I don’t
exactly have the experience you do. And it hurt me when I found
out. It really hurt. I know you weren’t actually my boyfriend, we
weren’t going together or anything, but it still hurt.”
    I searched his face, trying
to make sense of it.  He looked as if he were going to
cry.
    “ I don’t know why I went
with her. It just happened. I’m sorry. All I wanted was you and you
weren’t there.”
    “ So it was just
sex?”
    “ Yeah.”
    “ Then how do I know you
wont go off and do it with some other girl the next time you get
all hot and bothered?”
    He stared into my eyes,
looking to make the hurt disappear. “Guess you’ll have to trust
me.  Please, Bella.  Just trust me. I want to make it up
to you. This whole thing has made me realise how much you mean to
me. I’ve missed you so much.”
    “ I’m not some girl you can
just have when you feel like it, you know, I won’t be a game to
you.”
    Ben bit his lip.
    “ You’re not a game to me,”
he whispered. “I want to be with you so much it hurts. I tried to
forget you, tried not to think about how we fit together but I
couldn’t. And I wanted to tell you how I felt but I was scared.
I’ve never felt like this before. This is something totally new for
me too.”
    Then he pulled me to him and
kissed me.
    Hardly drawing breath, Ben’s
hands flew up and down the length of my spine. He crushed me to him
as his mouth ravaged mine. I burnt, I quivered, I sighed but I
couldn’t give in. My body was tingling from his words and I felt
giddy and faint. My knees trembled as he pushed me against the
timber railing, his kiss growing deeper and more
demanding.
    “ I’m sorry,” he whispered.
“I’m sorry. Can you forgive me?”
    “ As long as you don’t leave
me,” I answered.
    “ I won’t, I’ll never leave
you. You’re like this missing piece of me. I know that
now.”
    My head was spinning. That
little voice inside was telling me not to trust him, not to listen
to his words of love. If he would go with Lucy, he would go with
anybody but his fingers were tickling my breast through my top and
my body was growing hotter with each touch. He buried his head in
the shallow of my cleavage and kissed me there and then until, when
I could stand it no more; he pulled aside my bra and laid his lips
upon my breast. He was driving me into a frenzy I could not
control. My resolve was slipping with each kiss and I knew I had to
do something before his hands and tongue rendered me utterly
senseless.
    “ No.”
    His hands fell away and he
looked up at me. “What do you mean?”
    “ I said stop, that’s
enough. Somebody might see us.”
    “ Jesus, Bella, nobody can
see. We’re all alone. Come on…”
    I could see the annoyance
sparking in his eyes. This was no time for modesty. I was trying
his patience, no end.
    “ Ben.” I tried to wriggle
but his body had me pinned against the railing.
    “ What? Don’t you like
it?”
    “ It’s not that.”
    “ Then what?”
    “ You’re touching me and
kissing me and suddenly I saw myself and I realised how I must it
must look. Its just not right, out here in public.”
    Ben sighed and stood up. He
adjusted his clothes and ran a ragged hand through his hair. “I
guess so,” he said.  “But if this is going to work between us,
you’re gonna have to loosen up a little. I know you’re only fifteen
but you have to remember I’m eighteen.”
    I was shocked. Hadn’t he
just said he didn’t care about the sex? That it was