Guys who are worried about making the next car payment and worried about making the rent and worried about
the state of their credit card bills. Guys who wake up in the morning and look in the mirror and find themselves staring straight
into the face of a loser.”
“And Drew is what? One of their own?”
“Sort of.”
“You’d think they’d all be socialists.”
“They aren’t ‘ists.’ They don’t go that far. They just know that they’ve got to put up with being embarrassed every single
day, and it’s always by the local doctor or lawyer or professor at the community college, the guys who went and got the education
they didn’t get and probably couldn’t havegotten because they didn’t have the academic talent, those guys. And they hate them. They truly hate them.”
“So the whole phenomenon runs on hate.”
“The whole phenomenon runs on resentment. Drew makes them feel real. He says what they think and says it’s okay and makes
millions of dollars doing it. They feel like they’re getting their own back. I think of Drew as an addiction. When they can’t
have him, they get depressed. They go into withdrawal.”
“And they haven’t abandoned him because of the, ah, legal trouble?”
“You mean, because it turns out he’s been broadcasting high for the last three years? No, of course not. Half of them think
he’s the victim of some left-wing plot. All of them have or have had alcohol and drug problems of their own. They sympathize.”
“Then I don’t understand. Why are we having a problem with the numbers?”
“Well,” Marla said, “think of it this way. Their addiction is to Drew, not to right-wing politics. Oh, some of them have an
addiction to right-wing politics, and those people will go on listening no matter who’s putting out the message. But most
of these guys want Drew, personally. And Drew isn’t here. Drew is in rehab.”
“And they don’t like his replacement?”
“We’ve had three replacements in three weeks. None of them has gone over, and I don’t think any of the others we’re going
to try will. Drew is a true phenomenon. He’s practically sui generis. Even Limbaugh doesn’t generate the kind of blind loyalty
he does. Our numbers are off by fifty percent since the day Drew announced the drug thing, and that isn’t the worst news.
The worst news is that they’re still falling, and they’re falling fast.”
Frank thought about it. “But it’s temporary, isn’t it? Drew will be out of rehab, in, what, forty days?”
“Forty-two. I’ve got the replacements doing a countdown. But Frank, you’ve got to face some facts. One is that even though
Drew may get out of rehab, he may not be available to work right away. Or if he is, maybe not for long.”
“Meaning what?”
“Meaning that the DA isn’t going to let this go. He can’t let this go. People would scream bloody murder. He’s going to have
to prosecute.”
“But there won’t be a trial,” Frank said. “There never is in cases like this. There’ll be a plea bargain. I know Drew is stupid,
but he’s not stupid enough to go to trial and risk getting sent to a penitentiary.”
“No, he’s not. But the DA still has that problem, and my guess is that he’s going to insist on Drew doing at least some jail
time. The Feds won’t.No matter which side is in power when the time comes to do something about Drew’s case, they’ll back away. The Republicans
will do it because they don’t want to slam one of their own. The Democrats will do it because they don’t want to be accused
of playing politics. But the DA, Frank, the DA is stuck between a rock and a hard place. He’s going to have to insist on something
serious. Especially if he’s going after Sherman Markey. I mean, how would it look—you stick the addled old homeless guy in
jail for delivering the drugs but you let the rich celebrity go free because you think he’s a
the state of their credit card bills. Guys who wake up in the morning and look in the mirror and find themselves staring straight
into the face of a loser.”
“And Drew is what? One of their own?”
“Sort of.”
“You’d think they’d all be socialists.”
“They aren’t ‘ists.’ They don’t go that far. They just know that they’ve got to put up with being embarrassed every single
day, and it’s always by the local doctor or lawyer or professor at the community college, the guys who went and got the education
they didn’t get and probably couldn’t havegotten because they didn’t have the academic talent, those guys. And they hate them. They truly hate them.”
“So the whole phenomenon runs on hate.”
“The whole phenomenon runs on resentment. Drew makes them feel real. He says what they think and says it’s okay and makes
millions of dollars doing it. They feel like they’re getting their own back. I think of Drew as an addiction. When they can’t
have him, they get depressed. They go into withdrawal.”
“And they haven’t abandoned him because of the, ah, legal trouble?”
“You mean, because it turns out he’s been broadcasting high for the last three years? No, of course not. Half of them think
he’s the victim of some left-wing plot. All of them have or have had alcohol and drug problems of their own. They sympathize.”
“Then I don’t understand. Why are we having a problem with the numbers?”
“Well,” Marla said, “think of it this way. Their addiction is to Drew, not to right-wing politics. Oh, some of them have an
addiction to right-wing politics, and those people will go on listening no matter who’s putting out the message. But most
of these guys want Drew, personally. And Drew isn’t here. Drew is in rehab.”
“And they don’t like his replacement?”
“We’ve had three replacements in three weeks. None of them has gone over, and I don’t think any of the others we’re going
to try will. Drew is a true phenomenon. He’s practically sui generis. Even Limbaugh doesn’t generate the kind of blind loyalty
he does. Our numbers are off by fifty percent since the day Drew announced the drug thing, and that isn’t the worst news.
The worst news is that they’re still falling, and they’re falling fast.”
Frank thought about it. “But it’s temporary, isn’t it? Drew will be out of rehab, in, what, forty days?”
“Forty-two. I’ve got the replacements doing a countdown. But Frank, you’ve got to face some facts. One is that even though
Drew may get out of rehab, he may not be available to work right away. Or if he is, maybe not for long.”
“Meaning what?”
“Meaning that the DA isn’t going to let this go. He can’t let this go. People would scream bloody murder. He’s going to have
to prosecute.”
“But there won’t be a trial,” Frank said. “There never is in cases like this. There’ll be a plea bargain. I know Drew is stupid,
but he’s not stupid enough to go to trial and risk getting sent to a penitentiary.”
“No, he’s not. But the DA still has that problem, and my guess is that he’s going to insist on Drew doing at least some jail
time. The Feds won’t.No matter which side is in power when the time comes to do something about Drew’s case, they’ll back away. The Republicans
will do it because they don’t want to slam one of their own. The Democrats will do it because they don’t want to be accused
of playing politics. But the DA, Frank, the DA is stuck between a rock and a hard place. He’s going to have to insist on something
serious. Especially if he’s going after Sherman Markey. I mean, how would it look—you stick the addled old homeless guy in
jail for delivering the drugs but you let the rich celebrity go free because you think he’s a
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