the ocean, so this
will be the first time we ever feel the grainy sand under our feet. I heft
myself off the top bunk and land with a loud thud on the wooden
floor.
“Let’s go,” I say motioning for her to lead the way. Mia
skips ahead of me and Jenna follows behind her.
It’s not a long walk to the beach, maybe ten minutes tops.
Mia points out everything we pass. She looks like a tour guide. Big yellow and
pink hibiscus flowers. Proteas growing on an incline. All things that we can
clearly see because it’s kind of hard to miss, but she still points them out
with an “ooh” and an “ah”. A small reptile scurries over the foot path, and Mia
jumps back, knocking Jenna into me. I steady her by grabbing her shoulder. Her
thin white cardigan slips off her shoulder, and my hand moves up towards her
neck. Her skin is smooth, soft, sun-kissed, and slightly moist from the humid
air. She smiles up at me, her lips begging me to just have one taste. I’m very
aware of my sister watching our every move. So I take the coward’s way out. I
break eye contact, clear my throat, and turn her back around. I shove her
lightly in the direction of the beach, keeping her back turned towards me. I
don’t think I can take a repeat of that hurt look I saw in her front yard. Her
shoulders droop slightly, and she walks forward slowly.
Fuck it. The thought forms so fast in my brain I’m left
feeling dizzy. I don’t know why I decide to do it, but I grab hold of Jenna and
spin her around. Her big blue eyes go even wider, making her look even more
innocent. She stares at me with hurt and confusion and something I haven’t seen
in a long, long time. Hope. She wants me to kiss her, to own her, but that I’ve
known for a long time. She’s hoping that this will finally be the time I
realize I feel the same way. The thing is, I’ve known since I was a kid, when
Mia and Jenna made mud cakes in our front yard, that I liked Jenna. The first
time she smiled at me I knew she’d be my girlfriend one day. But I’ve never
been able to convince myself that I’m worthy of her. Not sweet, innocent,
beautiful Jenna. And now I’m even worse off. I’ve sold my life to someone else.
I have a price to pay, and it will leave her heart broken. It will leave
everyone I love scarred.
I lean in and brush my lips over hers. Her breath rushes
over my mouth and into my lungs. She was holding her breath. If only she could
breathe new life into me. Just one more, I promise myself. One more and I will
never touch her again. Jenna tangles her fingers in my hair and pulls me
closer. My arms snake around her waist, and I close the space between us. Her
body is soft and fits into mine like pieces of the same puzzle. My lips find
hers, and she opens her mouth. Just a tiny movement and a spark. A buzzing zap
combusts between us. My tongue sneaks past my teeth and caresses her bottom
lip. A small whimper escapes her throat, and she crushes her mouth against
mine. For a moment, both of us forget where we are. It’s a smashing duel of
lips, teeth, and tongue. I can’t get enough of her taste. I was starving, and
finally I get to taste this forbidden banquet. Jenna is the type of girl you
kiss and never forget. She brands your soul and captures your heart.
We both pull away breathless and shaking. One kiss and I’m
ruined. Now I know. I know I love this girl. And I will never get a chance to
show her.
When sense finally returns to my brain, I realize two
things. One: My annoying sister isn’t around and teasing us mercilessly. Two:
We missed the sunset and little white lights now light the walkway. How long
have we been standing here?
Jenna is still staring at me like she’s been struck by
lightning, and I get it, that was some first kiss. I can still feel her essence
buzzing under my skin. I take her hand and hold it in mine, squeezing it
gently. I lead us down the walkway. When we get to the bottom, Mia is
Celine Roberts
Gavin Deas
Guy Gavriel Kay
Donna Shelton
Joan Kelly
Shelley Pearsall
Susan Fanetti
William W. Johnstone
Tim Washburn
Leah Giarratano