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Authors: Michelle Davies
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Sarah gone at Maggie’s behest, it felt like the walls were closing in on her and the air
was being sucked out of the room. She tried to take deep breaths but her chest constricted as though crushed by the weight of her fear and when she spoke all she could manage was a ragged gasp.
‘Why hasn’t Maggie come back? Why is she taking so long?’ she asked Belmar, who stood by the French doors as if he was guarding them.
‘I’m sure she’ll be back soon.’
‘That’s what you said a minute ago.’
Belmar didn’t answer but glanced at the door leading to the hall. He’s doing it again, Lesley thought. Every time she asked him what was going on, he looked to the door. Was
something happening out there, was that why he kept checking?
‘Is there something you’re not telling me?’ she croaked as panic forced the breath from her lungs again. ‘Is that why Maggie hasn’t come back yet? Can you please
find out where she is?’
‘I think I should stay here until she gets back.’
Lesley had never struck another person in her life but Belmar’s refusal to act made her want to slap his face so hard she had to clench her fists to stop herself. As she did, an intense
heat surged through her body and she swayed on the spot.
‘Oh—’
‘Are you okay, Mrs Kinnock?’
‘I think I’m going to faint.’
Belmar darted forward and grabbed her arm. ‘Come and sit down.’
‘Please find out what’s going on,’ she said as he lowered her into a chair.
‘If you’re not well I should stay—’
‘Please,’ she implored him again. ‘I’m going mad not knowing.’
He caved. ‘Okay, but can you stay put until I get back?’
Too weary to argue, she nodded.
As he left the room, Lesley slumped over and put her face in her hands. Her skin felt clammy because it was warm inside the house and she was so exhausted she imagined she could fall asleep just
sitting there like that. But her mind wouldn’t let her rest and she began to cry again as it confronted her with image after image of Rosie looking terrified and calling for help that
wouldn’t come. The idea of someone causing suffering to her child was more than she could bear. For months she’d worried about the attention Rosie received because of their win and that
something like this might happen. She should’ve listened to her instinct and been there to protect her. That was her job as her mum, the only job that mattered, and she’d failed
her.
There was a knock on the door. Belmar entered first, clutching a glass of water. Behind him followed Maggie with a tall, striking man in a black suit who she’d spoken to earlier. He
introduced himself again as Detective Chief Inspector Will Umpire, the officer in charge.
He took a seat at the dining-room table next to hers. Maggie and Belmar also sat.
‘I want to thank you for your cooperation so far,’ he began. ‘I know it can’t be easy—’
Lesley held her hand up to stop him. She didn’t want to hear any more platitudes or apologies. Already she was sick of them skirting around what needed to be said.
‘Just tell me what’s going on. Is it Rosie’s blood?’
Umpire echoed what Maggie had said about more tests needing to be carried out. Lesley nodded but she wasn’t actually listening. The question about the blood wasn’t the one she really
wanted to ask. It was a prelude while she summoned the courage to articulate the question that had been swirling around her head like a maelstrom for the past few hours. The question no parent ever
wanted to ask. But she had to, needed to. This man was in charge of finding Rosie and she had to know what he was thinking.
‘Mr Umpire, do you think Rosie’s dead?’
The room went still and Lesley became aware of two sounds – a pulse pumping wildly in her ears and someone shouting outside, although she couldn’t make out exactly what through the
double-glazing. She saw Umpire exchange a brief glance with Maggie before he cleared his throat
was being sucked out of the room. She tried to take deep breaths but her chest constricted as though crushed by the weight of her fear and when she spoke all she could manage was a ragged gasp.
‘Why hasn’t Maggie come back? Why is she taking so long?’ she asked Belmar, who stood by the French doors as if he was guarding them.
‘I’m sure she’ll be back soon.’
‘That’s what you said a minute ago.’
Belmar didn’t answer but glanced at the door leading to the hall. He’s doing it again, Lesley thought. Every time she asked him what was going on, he looked to the door. Was
something happening out there, was that why he kept checking?
‘Is there something you’re not telling me?’ she croaked as panic forced the breath from her lungs again. ‘Is that why Maggie hasn’t come back yet? Can you please
find out where she is?’
‘I think I should stay here until she gets back.’
Lesley had never struck another person in her life but Belmar’s refusal to act made her want to slap his face so hard she had to clench her fists to stop herself. As she did, an intense
heat surged through her body and she swayed on the spot.
‘Oh—’
‘Are you okay, Mrs Kinnock?’
‘I think I’m going to faint.’
Belmar darted forward and grabbed her arm. ‘Come and sit down.’
‘Please find out what’s going on,’ she said as he lowered her into a chair.
‘If you’re not well I should stay—’
‘Please,’ she implored him again. ‘I’m going mad not knowing.’
He caved. ‘Okay, but can you stay put until I get back?’
Too weary to argue, she nodded.
As he left the room, Lesley slumped over and put her face in her hands. Her skin felt clammy because it was warm inside the house and she was so exhausted she imagined she could fall asleep just
sitting there like that. But her mind wouldn’t let her rest and she began to cry again as it confronted her with image after image of Rosie looking terrified and calling for help that
wouldn’t come. The idea of someone causing suffering to her child was more than she could bear. For months she’d worried about the attention Rosie received because of their win and that
something like this might happen. She should’ve listened to her instinct and been there to protect her. That was her job as her mum, the only job that mattered, and she’d failed
her.
There was a knock on the door. Belmar entered first, clutching a glass of water. Behind him followed Maggie with a tall, striking man in a black suit who she’d spoken to earlier. He
introduced himself again as Detective Chief Inspector Will Umpire, the officer in charge.
He took a seat at the dining-room table next to hers. Maggie and Belmar also sat.
‘I want to thank you for your cooperation so far,’ he began. ‘I know it can’t be easy—’
Lesley held her hand up to stop him. She didn’t want to hear any more platitudes or apologies. Already she was sick of them skirting around what needed to be said.
‘Just tell me what’s going on. Is it Rosie’s blood?’
Umpire echoed what Maggie had said about more tests needing to be carried out. Lesley nodded but she wasn’t actually listening. The question about the blood wasn’t the one she really
wanted to ask. It was a prelude while she summoned the courage to articulate the question that had been swirling around her head like a maelstrom for the past few hours. The question no parent ever
wanted to ask. But she had to, needed to. This man was in charge of finding Rosie and she had to know what he was thinking.
‘Mr Umpire, do you think Rosie’s dead?’
The room went still and Lesley became aware of two sounds – a pulse pumping wildly in her ears and someone shouting outside, although she couldn’t make out exactly what through the
double-glazing. She saw Umpire exchange a brief glance with Maggie before he cleared his throat
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