Read Online From This Moment On by Debbi Rawlins - Free Book Online Page B
Authors: Debbi Rawlins
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have to act tough around me, Nikki. I get it.”
“Act tough?” She scoffed. “I am tough. I’ve had to be. And no, you don’t get it.” She felt badly he’d spent those past few moments reliving his father’s illness. She did. But their situations were different and she didn’t like him thinking she was weak and needy.
“For the sake of argument, how about we agree that you can use me as a sounding board or a shoulder to cry on if the need arises.”
“Look, I’m sorry about your dad. You have such a great family and he was too young, but I’m fine. I am. I—” She totally lost her train of thought when she saw tenderness soften the lines bracketing his mouth. Why did she find it so hard to accept kindness? She didn’t doubt Trace’s sincerity, so why was she always unprepared for it? Looking past him, she stared at the cloudless blue sky, the snowcapped peaks of the Rockies. So much beauty. She should be finding peace inside, not panic, certainly not fear that her legs would give out. Oh, God...
Trace was quick, startling both the mare and her. He reached Nikki, and put his arms around her before she could tell him to stop. She was tempted to sag against his broad chest until the shakiness passed. For that same reason, she struggled to get away from him. Maybe that was the trouble with him. He made her weak. His kindness, the concerned looks and gentle touches chipped away at her defenses. Somehow he seemed to see past her facade and that was dangerous for her. How had he even known about her horse phobia? Matt hadn’t seen it.
“Come on, now. I’m not hurting you.” Trace loosened his hold. “I’m not even gonna kiss you.” He had that damn smile in his voice. “Of course if you want me to...”
She’d quit fighting him when he mentioned the kiss, but realized it only now. And then told herself it was better that she stay where she was so he couldn’t see her face. “Trace, I swear—”
“I’m just teasing you.” His short husky laugh skipped along her nerve endings. He began gently stroking her back, she imagined, much like how he’d been stroking Gypsy’s neck. “I have something to say but not while we’re looking at each other.” He rested his chin on top of her head. His heart pounded against the palm she laid on his chest. “Okay?”
It was probably a trick to spark her curiosity. “I don’t like my hands and arms trapped like this.”
“Put them around my waist. I don’t mind.”
She laughed. “Oh, Trace.”
“What?” He leaned back to look at her. “I’m serious. I have something to tell you.”
“All right. I’m listening.” She couldn’t seem to stay mad at him, which was irritating in itself. Another reason she should stay away from him, not be meeting him in secret. If there was another guy like him on the planet, she sure hadn’t met him.
His chest expanded on a sigh. “I’ve never told anyone this so I’d appreciate you not repeating it.”
“I won’t.” She slipped her arms free and slid them around him, pressing her cheek to his chest, feeling his strong steady heartbeat.
“One day my father and I were mending fences in the north pasture. I was pissed off that I had to work that particular afternoon because we were having a dance at school later, and any one of the hands could’ve been doing the work. But my dad, he had this thing about doing different projects with each son. Cole had had lots of one-on-one time with him when he was in high school and so had Jesse. Dad wanted to make sure we boys knew how to do everything on the ranch and felt it was a good way to spend individual time with us.
“Well, I bitched and moaned that I wouldn’t be ready in time to pick up my date, it was my first dance and I’d be too tired to enjoy it and on and on. Normally he would’ve let me go and we would’ve rescheduled. But I’d done that to him twice before so I could try out for varsity football. Then once he’d had to cancel.” Trace
“Act tough?” She scoffed. “I am tough. I’ve had to be. And no, you don’t get it.” She felt badly he’d spent those past few moments reliving his father’s illness. She did. But their situations were different and she didn’t like him thinking she was weak and needy.
“For the sake of argument, how about we agree that you can use me as a sounding board or a shoulder to cry on if the need arises.”
“Look, I’m sorry about your dad. You have such a great family and he was too young, but I’m fine. I am. I—” She totally lost her train of thought when she saw tenderness soften the lines bracketing his mouth. Why did she find it so hard to accept kindness? She didn’t doubt Trace’s sincerity, so why was she always unprepared for it? Looking past him, she stared at the cloudless blue sky, the snowcapped peaks of the Rockies. So much beauty. She should be finding peace inside, not panic, certainly not fear that her legs would give out. Oh, God...
Trace was quick, startling both the mare and her. He reached Nikki, and put his arms around her before she could tell him to stop. She was tempted to sag against his broad chest until the shakiness passed. For that same reason, she struggled to get away from him. Maybe that was the trouble with him. He made her weak. His kindness, the concerned looks and gentle touches chipped away at her defenses. Somehow he seemed to see past her facade and that was dangerous for her. How had he even known about her horse phobia? Matt hadn’t seen it.
“Come on, now. I’m not hurting you.” Trace loosened his hold. “I’m not even gonna kiss you.” He had that damn smile in his voice. “Of course if you want me to...”
She’d quit fighting him when he mentioned the kiss, but realized it only now. And then told herself it was better that she stay where she was so he couldn’t see her face. “Trace, I swear—”
“I’m just teasing you.” His short husky laugh skipped along her nerve endings. He began gently stroking her back, she imagined, much like how he’d been stroking Gypsy’s neck. “I have something to say but not while we’re looking at each other.” He rested his chin on top of her head. His heart pounded against the palm she laid on his chest. “Okay?”
It was probably a trick to spark her curiosity. “I don’t like my hands and arms trapped like this.”
“Put them around my waist. I don’t mind.”
She laughed. “Oh, Trace.”
“What?” He leaned back to look at her. “I’m serious. I have something to tell you.”
“All right. I’m listening.” She couldn’t seem to stay mad at him, which was irritating in itself. Another reason she should stay away from him, not be meeting him in secret. If there was another guy like him on the planet, she sure hadn’t met him.
His chest expanded on a sigh. “I’ve never told anyone this so I’d appreciate you not repeating it.”
“I won’t.” She slipped her arms free and slid them around him, pressing her cheek to his chest, feeling his strong steady heartbeat.
“One day my father and I were mending fences in the north pasture. I was pissed off that I had to work that particular afternoon because we were having a dance at school later, and any one of the hands could’ve been doing the work. But my dad, he had this thing about doing different projects with each son. Cole had had lots of one-on-one time with him when he was in high school and so had Jesse. Dad wanted to make sure we boys knew how to do everything on the ranch and felt it was a good way to spend individual time with us.
“Well, I bitched and moaned that I wouldn’t be ready in time to pick up my date, it was my first dance and I’d be too tired to enjoy it and on and on. Normally he would’ve let me go and we would’ve rescheduled. But I’d done that to him twice before so I could try out for varsity football. Then once he’d had to cancel.” Trace
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