French kiss
indirectly answering Alexa's question.
    Ugh, Alexa thought furiously. If Diego didn't know these people, why was he chatting them up? He could easily befriend these types back in New Jersey.
    Crossing her arms over her chest, Alexa noticed another couple cuddled together in front of the wire barrier, murmuring in what she guessed was Japanese. They were observing Diego's conversation with White Hat Boy closely, clearly intrigued by the antics of crazy Americans.
    "Florida," the guy replied, adjusting his backwards cap on his small head. "Orlando."
    "Proud home of Disney World," the girl chimed in drily, curling her lip, and Alexa thought that, under different circumstances, she might almost like her.
    "No shit I'm from Miami!" Diego laughed, his eyes dancing, as if this were the happiest coincidence of his life. The couple started laughing, too, loudly commenting on how dope South Beach was.
    "I guess it really is a small world after all," Alexa muttered, eager to put an end to Diego's insta-love affair with the Disney World Duo. She tugged on her boyfriend's arm again, hoping he'd get the hint: She was cold, hungry, and absolutely ready to head back down.
    76
    But, apparently, Diego and his new best friends had other plans.
    "Have you guys seen this freakiness?" Lip Ring Girl was asking, gesturing to the wax models, while her partner in crime dug around in his mammoth backpack. "I don't get the French at all."
    "Nuts," Diego agreed, and then pointed to the view beyond the wire barrier. "But that is something else, huh? It's too bad it's not completely open." Diego made a pouty face, as if, Alexa thought, the people of France had personally betrayed him by not making the Eiffel Tower open-air.
    "You know you can stick your face outside, right?" White Hat Boy exclaimed, still wrestling with his backpack. He finally pulled out what looked like a train schedule. "I'm serious, it's so cool you should try it."
    "Really?" Diego replied, grinning, and Alexa's stomach sank; she could just see Diego and Mr. All-American bonding over silly Eiffel Tower stunts all night. But, fortunately, the next thing White Hat Boy said was that he and his girlfriend had to make a late train to Amsterdam -- "Dude, we can't wait to blow Paris" so they needed to take off.
    After Diego had bid a hearty farewell to his newfound buddies -- Alexa was surprised they all didn't
    77
    exchange e-mail addresses -- he promptly turned around and walked back up to the wire barrier.
    Her irritation mounting, Alexa watched as her boyfriend, acting on the instructions of White Hat Boy, poked his face through one of the diamond-shaped openings. "Bonjour, Paris!" Diego shouted, his atrocious accent echoing through the night sky. The Japanese couple stared at him unabashedly, and the smattering of other people up there -- a sleepy guard, and a few chatty Italian twelve-year-old girls in cashmere capelets -- all glanced Diego's way as well, clearly wondering where this lunatic had come from.
    Alexa went rigid with shock. Forget throwing him off, she decided. Now she was the one who wanted to jump. Plunging onto the Champ de Mars, her filmy golden skirt flying over her head, would put an appropriately dramatic end to her humiliation.
    "Stop ... embarrassing ... me," Alexa said through gritted teeth, marching over to Diego and yanking on his arm. "Everybody's looking."
    Diego pulled his head back inside. Alexa expected him to apologize, but instead he angrily set his jaw. "Alexa, give it a rest," he snapped. "Why are you always so hung up on what other people think?"
    Alexa recoiled, pressing a palm to her bare collarbone. What was Diego babbling about? "That's
    78
    not true --" she began, ready to point out that anyone would have been mortified by his display of dorkiness.
    "Oh, please," Diego cut in. "From the minute we've arrived in Paris, you've been totally paranoid that everything I do might make you look like a fool -- or God forbid -- a foreigner!" He crossed his

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