Read Online For the Love of Money by Sam Polk - Free Book Online Page A

smart Ben was. I told him the whole story.
    When Edward and I got off the bus, Ben was waiting. I introduced Edward, and Ben introduced his new girlfriend, Jen. Ben also introduced a skinny, fresh-faced girl from Rochester named Kirsten Thompson. She was all arms and legs, with frizzy hair that exploded out of her head like an Afro, and clearly shy. I liked her immediately.
    The first night, Kirsten and I exchanged looks from opposite sides of the group. The next night, we talked quietly on the perimeter. During a snowball fight, I tackled her. Later that night, I kissed her.
    She had a roommate, so we couldn’t be alone in her room.Instead, I pushed two couches in the lounge together to make a sort of bed. Anyone could walk by, so we didn’t hook up. We talked, then fell asleep in each other’s arms. I slept for fourteen hours. In the morning, Kirsten and I went for breakfast.
    I didn’t want to return to Columbia. I felt safe with Ben. And Kirsten seemed a gift from God. Edward agreed to skip classes for a week to stay at Cornell.
    A few nights later we went out to Ben’s favorite drinking spot, an old Irish pub called Rulloff’s. I stood at the bar with Kirsten and Jen, while Edward and Ben floated off to a table. An hour later, I looked over to see Ben and Edward engaged in intense conversation. As I walked to the bathroom, I wondered what they were talking about.
    When I came out, Ben was gone. Edward’s head was in his hands. I walked to the table and sat down.
    â€œWhere’s Ben?” I asked.
    Edward kept his head in his hands. He seemed very drunk. Suddenly, I knew.
    â€œYou told him about Emma,” I said.
    Edward’s head dropped deeper into his hands. I stared at him, dumbfounded.
    â€œWhat could you possibly have been thinking?” I said. I called Ben from a pay phone. He didn’t pick up. I kept dialing. Ten minutes later his girlfriend answered. “Ben wants you to leave,” she said. “He’s in my room, so you can pick up your stuff from his room and go.”
    It was two in the morning. Edward and I fetched our luggage and stood silently in the Ithaca cold until the 4:00 a.m. Short Line bus arrived. As we settled into our seats, Edward’s eyes continued to seek mine in apology. I ignored him. I looked straight ahead and thought about Kirsten. I hadn’t even said good-bye. I knew I might never see her again. I knew it would be years before Ben forgave me.

CHAPTER 8
    The Boy with the Dragon Tattoo
    Â¤
    A fter freshman year of college, Ben stayed at Cornell, but I went home for the summer. It would be the last time I ever went home.
    During second semester, I’d befriended another freshman wrestler, a heavyweight named Francisco who loved to party. We’d become drinking buddies, then drug buddies. I now smoked weed every day. I was still throwing up, but not as much. I’d used a combination of willpower and sleeping pills to cut back. Hungry at night, instead of eating, I’d take two Valiums to knock me out. But I still yacked from time to time. The second day of the summer, home alone, I ordered an extra-large cheese-in-the-crust pepperoni pizza and two dozen chicken wings, ate them, and then vomited in the toilet.
    One night I was smoking a joint in the backyard when Dad came out. He looked at me, looked at the joint, and then asked if he could have a drag. I looked up at him in surprise.
    â€œYou remember how your friend Nate Robertson used to stop by all the time while you were in high school?” he asked. I nodded.
    â€œHe was selling me pot,” Dad said.
    I felt a dull ache in my chest as I registered that Dad and my friend had kept a secret from me for years. But I didn’tprotest. I didn’t want Dad to get mad, go inside. Sometimes it felt like the price of being with him was getting my feelings hurt.
    Dad didn’t talk to me like a son. More like a fishing buddy. The summer before, when I worked